Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did Tyrone Jenkins say when Obama was elected? Nothing. He is not a real person, but merely a hypothetically existent man used only for the portrayal of a lacking punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

ALCATRAZ IS REOPENED!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: why wasn't the fan spinning? A: because it wasn't on. Duh....

thumb_up thumb_down -25

why didn't the unicorn have a horn? It was a horse. Why didn't the horse have a horn? it was not a unicorn.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q:What's brown and tastes like shit? A:Shit

thumb_up thumb_down -25

There is no "i" in "team," but there are two in "indigo."

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How do you confuse a blond? Nordic mytholigi. That is, if shes american

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Shut up max im not fucking demented u dickhead

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's the difference between a duck? They are mostly the same, only one leg is shorter.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a successful black man who owns millions? Either a criminal or a fictional character.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's big, grey, and can't climb a tree? A car park.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call the offspring of an elephant? A baby elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? TO GET TO THE SAME SIDE!!!BAZZINGA!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Girl 1- why was 6 afraid of 7? dog- ..................................(doesn't say anything because dogs can't ruff)

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Roses are red Violets are blue And so avatars And so is blue paint

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A horse walks into a bar the bartender says "Why the long face?" and the horse said "My wife died of terminal cancer"

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

thumb_up thumb_down -25

oooooooooooooo yeah write there thats the spot what i was talking about my car

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops