An old asian woman is driving down the freeway a drunk driver merges into her lane. Everyone is ok because she keeps a safe distance behind.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the Hungarian say before he went to bed? "I'm going to bed," but he said it in Hungarian.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call someone who thinks they're funny but in reality isn't? Adam chapali Knock knock Who's there? NOT adam chapali

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

on a scale from voldemort to nigel thornberry, how big is your penis?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was the man sent to the hospital? He got crushed by a flying refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Immaculate Misconception - Motionless In White \m/

thumb_up thumb_down +3

bite me

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Yo' mamma's so poor she's homeless and dying of starvation.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve you kind here." The black man says, "Is it because I'm black?" The bartender replies, "Yes."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a man who's a gynecologist, painter and respected martial arts champion? Talented.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

thumb_up thumb_down +3

i punched my mother in the face once she cried

thumb_up thumb_down +3

q: why won't the asian girl do anything? a: it's pretty hard to move or speak being gagged and tied up in my basement

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are crimson. Violets are purple. I don't understand why this poem is so popular.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know what? SCREW YOU!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Three Kids dressed as a bear, a chicken, and a penguin walk into a bar. The bartender asks the to leave as they are all under the legal drinking age.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? *Pulls out finger gun* *Screams BOOM!*

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What sits on a shelf and says hey im a book? A person who thinks hes a book.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops