A black man, a jew and a muslim walk into a bar. ... I forgot what happens next, so let's just say they have a good time and get back home safely.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What can be said about a high school drop out who is 30, lives with his mom, and plays WoW all day? He is probably a very high level mage

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the kid get on the bus. Because he had to go home

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

thumb_up thumb_down +26

So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

thumb_up thumb_down +24

I was hungrey then i saw a man puke. Im still very hungrey. Then i threw up. Im not so hungrey

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's worse than a work in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Seeing the same joke repeated thousands of times on anti-joke.com.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

thumb_up thumb_down +24

what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How did the clown crash his car? A horrible tornado chrashed through the town.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q why did the girl scream A she got hit with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops