Ha ha. You've wasted your life, sucker!

Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that just got shot

Once upon a time, there were a lot of Jews......

Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, Retinal Hemorrhage.

Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

Two blonds walk into a bar, the brunette ducked

a pope and a catholic priest walk into a bar... the priest orders... then the pope says to the bartender "I'll have what hes having." so the bartender takes out a small child and says ...."are you sure?"

A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

Whats big black and hairy? A large black dog.

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

what's worse than me fucking your mom she enjoyed it

Knock knock Who's there? No one ever mentioned someone named "there" it's me, Jim

Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

What is rainbow-colored, makes no sounds, and smells like a banana? A rainbow-colored banana

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.

roses are red, violets are blue, poems are stupid, refridgerator

What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

What time is it? If I hadn't poked your eyes out, you might know.

Whats worse than driving a Ford Taurus? Driving two Ford Taurus'

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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