why didn't Lebron James give me a fourth quarter?...he forgot his wallet at home and didn't have any spare change.

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why was the woman crying? her son killed 5 people.

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Me: Ask me if I'm an orange. You: Are you an orange? Me: No

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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Why didn't the man get into Harvard? Because he had bad grades

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Harry Potter: Hey voldemort, you wanna go get our noses pierced?? Voldemort: I killed your parents.

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Q: Why did the Asian fail his driving test? A: Lack of concentration on the road and low knowledge of functioning a car.

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Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

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- Pete and Repeat are in a boat. Repeat falls off, who's left? - Pete? - F**k yes.

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A child wasn't wearing knee pads when he was skateboarding. He proceeded to fall of his board and break his arm

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What did the piano say to the guitar? "G, it's not A nice day. B careful, Dee." What did the guitar say to the piano? "F you!" What did the piano reply? "Eek! C you later!"

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What did the physicist say when he got his penis stuck in a test tube? Ah jeesh! I got my penis stuck in a test tube.

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In soviet Russia, your dead because it doesn't exist anymore

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why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

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how do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? it doesn't matter. she can't climb up a tree with only one arm.

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What do you call a black man holding a stone with bloody hands A hard working stone mason

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? I don't know, he couldn't open it.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and mentally retarded; you sexist fiend.

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What's grey and can't swim? A castle.

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what do you call a gay guy? kevin

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What is the Pirates favorite letter? C

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Roses are blue, Violets are purple, I like chicken. Do you like chicken?

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Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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