How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

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Why didn't Suzie answer her mother? Suzie has a serious condition where she is mute and also severely deaf.

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A man walks into a chiropractor. The chiropractor asked whats wrong with you? The man replies My boner has scoliosis.

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A black man walks into a store and buys a gun based upon the increasing crime rate in his area. He stops for lunch and heads home.

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Why are some people so barbaric? Because some people are German.

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Friends are a lot like trees I just thought you should know.

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How did the mexican cross the border? He went through border patroll, and then later became a legal citizen of North America

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A man was shot. He died.

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why do you kill people in call of duty you don't you kill computer made figures

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Why does the man have mayonaise in his pants? A: I don't know, I was hoping you could tell me.

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why do chairs recline Because they were built that way!!!!

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Democracy.

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What do you call a duck playing a trombone? Hallucinations

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What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

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A dog walks into a bar. He's a service animal, so this is allowed.

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My dog has no nose, how does it smell? Using its anus.

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Sammy bought 48 donuts. He ate 36. What was Sammy left with? Diabetes. Sammy was left with diabetes.

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Why did the doctor not make it to his appointment in time? Because he died in 9/11!

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What did the Mexican shoe salesman say to the man? Excuse me, do you whih way to main street?

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will you like this joke my sources say no

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What did the dog say to the tree? Bark.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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a young boy once lost his mind and then his parents weeped because their son had been decapatated in a horrible motorcycle accident caused by a drunk who had just killed his wife and children and was running from the cops....

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. The stewardess calls secret service and has the man arrested.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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