"bus driver pressed the horn at my mum and she stuck a finger up at him " Not the first time she's got the horn and shoved a finger up

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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Why did the black man vote for Obama in the presidential election? Every person over the age of 21 has an open opinion to vote for the person of their choice to run as president for a 4-year term.

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Why did the chicken rape your...wait, that's not how it goes!

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas?? - Cancer

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why is the earth mad at the moon? cause the moon mooned the earth

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How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

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So a guy says to his dog "hey man when you piss in the toilet can you please flush, just because I don't like to look at your pee." then the dog sits back and says "...woof !!"

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Why didn't Katie cross the road? Because she's dead.

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Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

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Benny: Hi, my name is Benny, what's your name? A potato: ...

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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What did the red fish say to the blue fish? Nothing fish can't talk.

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On a tusday night, three guys walk into a bar After realising they have to work they proceed to exit

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor Wheres my tractor?

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What do you call a man with no eyes? A hero for going to war and surviving being tortured by the Vietnamese.

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Hey I just met you I'm on bathsalts your face looks tasty

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So a horse walks into a bar.. and breaks both its front legs. The owner has to shoot it because it can't race anymore

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What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

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Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

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In the movie "Sherlock Holmes". Why is Sherlock Holmes gay???? Because he was chasing "Blackwood".

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how did the cat call 9-1-1? very carefully as cats do not have opposable thumbs, making the whole situation rare, and semi-improbable.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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