Why did the man turn up at his friend's funeral dressed as Mickey Mouse? Because it would have been disrespectful not to attend.

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How did the Jew escape the concentration camp?

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm Schizophrenic And so am I.

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

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What do you call a black man with a gun? Officer.

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An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

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what this: b a dead one of these: p

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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I got stopped for speeding the other day. The policeman said I had to pay a £50 fine. I was gutted. However, later that night I had amazing sex with my wife, which helped me to take my mind off things a bit.

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how do yopu punish helen keller? Ground her, just like you would with any other child.

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roses are red violets are blue the thing in the toilet reminds me of you :)

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Why was Samuel L. Jackson so tired of those motherf***ing snakes on that motherf***ing plane? Because if snakes are loose on a plane, they might bite you.

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A child wasn't wearing knee pads when he was skateboarding. He proceeded to fall of his board and break his arm

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Why didn't the black man understand an anti-joke? Because like any other member of the human race, he expected a typical joke structure to occur, starting with a misleading introduction which then using surrealism or misguidance trails into a humorous punchline.

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a dog.

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what do you get when you combine sodium and hydroxide? sodium-hydroxide

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What's grey and can't swim? A castle.

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If I was in a room with Osama bin laden and george bush, and my friend. And I had a gun with two bullets, I'd shoot my friend twice.

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How did little Tommy die? i pushed him into the deep end of the pool

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Q. There were 2 Mexicans in a car, who was driving it? A. The police officer.

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What's more fun than nailing a baby to a wall? Pulling it off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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