Your mum's so fat that she's incredibly lucky she has a loving and supportive husband who values her personality over her appearance.

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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why has kallum just changed clothes to speak to a counsellor because he's socially awkward and has no peers

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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Whats a movie? A moving picture.

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How can humans fly? Well if you run and jump of a cliff...nevermind you would just smash your face on the ground. I guess that isn't technically flying.

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Who's the best player in Madden 07 on the PS2? Michael Vick.

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Why could'nt Susie talk? The mafia cut out her tounge

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How many times do you have to make an ass of yourself before you look like a retard and thinking ''random'' means funny? Fuck yourself HAHAHAHAHA seriously stahp

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How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With a blindfold.

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Q:Why did Sara fall off the swing? A: Because she has no arms. ..... Knock knock! who's there? Not Sara, she has no arms and doesn't have the abitlity to knock.

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ewrg

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What do chicken and babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

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What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

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why was Michael Jackson at K-Mart? They offer high quality items at a reasonable price and lay-away during the holidays.

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Why was the Africanan boy hungry? Because food is hard to come by in Africa.

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I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

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What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

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what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

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what did michael jackson do when i swore at him? nothing he's dead

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Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

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What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops