How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

Why did the black man cross the road? he just wanted to cross the road, racist. ... after he had robbed a bank

Why was the old man lying on the floor? He had a heart attack and died

whats black and hangs from my tree my neighbor

Knock knock Who's there? It's me It's me who? It's me who is knocking the door

50 gay man and a homophobe are in a nightclub in Florida ...you know how the rest goes.

How do you make a person dissapear? You can't that would break the laws of physics, so therefore rendered impossibe.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

What did the fork say to the spoon? I have tongs and you don't. Ha.

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

why was the girl unhappy? because she was stapled to a shark.

Why did the mokey board the westbound train? I said gray umbrella noodle head!

A man falls out of a boat. What happens next? Well, you would think he'd know how to swim, but due to his alzheimer's he didn't, so he drowned.

How often does the lesbian vampire group meet up? Never. Lesbians don't exist.

How do you know when a blonde has been using your computer? If you're lucky some of his or hair will have fallen out and be left on the keyboard as evidence.

american idol

why was the fork in the wall? Why would a fork be in a wall?

A plane filled with English tourists is on it's way from Holland to Spain. It crashes in France. Where are the surviors buried? Survivors aren't buried.

What's just not right? Left

What do you call a jew without a nose? A most likely kind and interesting anti- steriotypical person

why did amelia earhart get lost? because she was a woman

One time, as a dare, John was forced to eat 5 king size chocolate bars, 3 cakes, 8 Oreo Milkshakes, and 7 packages of Krispy Kreme Donuts. As a result, John has diabetes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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