Did you go swimming in the Carribean Ocean? Yes, a shark ate my body, and killed me! Thank God I'm still alive!

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What do you call an awesome bucket? An epic pail.

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What do u call 2 black people in the front of a car 3 in the back and 2 on top of the car going off a clif? A waste u can fit 2 more in the trunk

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Q: What do you call a drunk man driving a Corvette with no arms, no legs and a missing eye? A: A severely impaired driver

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whats worse then a truck full of babies? if it went off a cliff into a canyon full of knives.

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What's the difference between a goat and a cherry? You can't put a goat on top of your ice cream.

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Geography Teacher: What caused the earthquake of Japan? Me: Godzilla constipated too hard, and it caused an earthquake. Tsunami was the result of his poo. Geography Teacher: then how do you explain the after shocks...? Me: Godzilla shat his pants after the toilet

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Did you know that Hellen Keller had an amusement park in her backyard? Neither did she.

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What do an onion and a hamster have in common? They are both in my Grandma's omelette.

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what's the best way to remove leaves from a tree? take them off

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but smell this towel, you won't remember a thing.

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why am I a hobo? because I lost my job.

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What do you get when you write your own anti-joke? Herpes.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swings? Because she didn't have arms or legs. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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One day a duck was swimming on the lake and sees an alligator. The alligator says "You will be my next victim." The duck says "Quack."

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Why doesn't Lucinda have a penis? Because she's Mexican.

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what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercourse? I have aids

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RACIST JOKE Why did the racist cross the road? He wanted to get to the other side.

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roses are red, violets are blue... thats what they tell me because im blind

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Well Here Goes Nothing And nothing happened

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Why are humans and squirrels the same? They both live in trees except for the human

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whats worse than drinking bad milk? tea bagging a bear trap

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What's worse than having AIDS? A piano falling on your left middle finger.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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