Why did the redneck leave his wife? To marry his daughter.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

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What does mickee say to other animals. Mouse

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whats the difference between a black man playing basketball and a white man playing basketball? They are different races

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What happened to George's pet rock? It ran away.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill. But it was winter and they froze to death

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What did Stephen Hawking say after he scaled Mount Everest? Yay!

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What's wet and pink? Bubblegum!

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when life givs you lemons you say no thank you i dont take food from strangers

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Youu might be a Jew if you........take part in a weekly service at your local synagogue.

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who has moral fiber? a cerial killer

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ask me what my temperpedic bed is like. ''whats it like?'' i dont know ive never had one actully.

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What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

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Whats the same between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple except for the elephant

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what do you call a white man who appears to be standing on water? a surfer

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'Doctor, doctor, I think I'm a pair of curtains' Doctor prescribes antipsychotics.

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why was 6 afraid of 9? because 7 ate 9 and 6 is afraid of ghosts

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Roses are Red I shit in your Stew When you eat it The joke is on you

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my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

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What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

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Hey

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

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Ubisoft 'Very Impressed' By Pokemon Go, Working on AR game of their own.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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