Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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what did the man with Alzheimer's say to his son? who are you!?

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was in a chicken pen.

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What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

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Hey man. what? squidbillies.

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So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

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Why does Michael J. Fox always have his martinis shaken? He thinks they taste better that way.

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Women deserve equal rights.

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How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

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An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

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Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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Horse.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

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Why did the car's airbag go off? He hit a boy eating his ice cream

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

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Who are the faster readers? New Yorkers, they through 110 stories in 5 seconds

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An Irishman, Englishman and Scotsman come across a magic slide. They each decide to take a turn. The Irishman goes first, sliding down and shouting "GOLD!", and finding himself in a pile of gold as he reaches the bottom. The Englishman slides down screaming "SILVER!", and lands in a heap of silver at the bottom. The Scotsman takes his turn, and shouts "WEEEE!" as he slides down. He gets up and realises what a needless waste of a wish his enjoyment cost him.

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Holocaust jokes are in bad taste, Anne Frankly I won't have any of it.

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whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

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Jon waits in his driveway for a bit then rides off to a lemonade stand but doesn't stop because the stand is surrounded by police who have arrested the kids at the stand for selling spiked lemonade. He continues past the stand and goes somewhere else (probably Subway).

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My granddad fell down the stairs the other day... Yeh, we didn't find it very funny either.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops