Why was the man like a chimp? Because they are 96% genetically identical.

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why was the baby crying? cause his abusive father broke his arm.

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What did the Orange say to the Apple? Hi

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What does a blond do when she stops at a red light? She gets arrested.

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What do you call a girl who has recently been raped? Dead.

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How do you get through a locked door? Unlock it.

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What did the teacher do? He taught.

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Why was the black man carrying the television away from the store? He bought it

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Knock knock. Who's there? Imaj. Imaj who? Haha, you're a Jew.

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer

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what are you your not a human? are you an other?

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How do you stop the neighbors from calling the police when you play your music too loud? Kill them and use their bodies as noise insulation

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What is white and hard to catch? A refrigerator

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How come Helen Keller didn’t scream when she fell off the cliff? Because at 19 months she contracted an illness that left her blind and deaf and therefore never learned to properly use her vocal cords

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Your mom is so stupid that she failed out of high school and now has two jobs to support her family.

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What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot n' spicy and the other analyzes urine. -Emo Phillips

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Did you ever hear about that rich Mexican?? No. Yeah, me neither.

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I tried to play soccer a long time ago. I didn't score and managed to get red card... Then I realized it was not my thing

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Why couldn't Ariel talk in the Little Mermaid? Someone slit her throat.

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God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

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what's gray, rectangular, and provides a good time? your mother's sex tape.

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Q:what do you call someone who spends 7 hours a day playing video games? A: Someone who takes pride and joy from gaming

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Why are lawers are so scared of Jerry bryant? Because he bites

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How did the Mexican cross the border without getting caught? He didn't; he was executed immediately.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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