What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

Why can't Larry drive? Larry's a rock.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

Why did the guy in the ferrari stop? -He hit the median at 100mph.

A Jew, a Muslim, and a black guy board a plane. Who gets kicked off first? The jew for his unruly behavior towards the flight attendant.

Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

Jerry Rice is walking down the streets of San Francisco when all of a sudden he hears sirens coming from the next street down. He hurries down the road to see what's happening and sees a huge fire engulfing a 10 story building. And on the top floor, a lady is leaning out the window shouting to the firemen below. FIREMAN: Come on, lady, jump. We have the tarp here, we'll be able to catch you. LADY: No....I can't. My baby, my baby is up here. FIREMAN: Throw the baby down, we'll catch him. LADY: No, you'll miss. I can't leave my baby. Jerry sees this and steps forward. "Hey, I think I can help. Let me have the bullhorn." JERRY: Hey lady, I'm Jerry Rice, the wide receiver for the San Francisco 49er's. I'm the best wide receiver in the game, throw your baby down and I'll catch him, this is what I do for a living. Being a 49er fan herself, the lady recognizes Jerry and throws her baby down to him. Just as she throws it though, a huge gust of wind comes and takes the baby and starts to blow him off course. Jerry sees this and takes off after the baby. He hurdles the line closing off the area, fights through the crowd, dodges a couple of fire fighters, jumps over the car, and dives forward, just making a fingertip catch of the baby. The crowd around him goes wild and starts cheering his amazing catch. So Jerry jumps to his feet, raises his finger into the air, does a two step and then spikes the baby. If you have any dead baby jokes that are not here, I want to hear from you. Email me your dead baby jokes at skitzopathik@hotmail.com and I'll add them to this page.

I hate it when people dont finish there sen

What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

What happens when you cross a Mexican and a Chinese man? A multiracial man.

Many people dont know this about me, but I'm not very famous.

CALLER: Is your refrigerator running? OWNER: Yes, it's working just fine.

What is the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The word anti before anti-joke.

Three Jews walked into a bar. I lied... it was a gas chamber.

What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

Why'd the black man smell awful... Because he hadn't showered in multiple days

"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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