When life gives you a hamburger, you know you're at Mr. Life's Hamburger Stand on 8th Avenue.

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Two Mexicans are at the border and want to cross it. How do they cross it? Illegally

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Q. What do you get when you cross a bird with a human? A. Arrested.

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Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. There is a frog in his beer.

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whats the difference between a fat person and a skinny person ? there weight.

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How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

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Why was the orphan's christmas sad? He got a violent chest infection and died.

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

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What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

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what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

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Okay so there was a turtle, a pig, and a donkey. They were out fishing when suddenly they spot a man in boat. The man said he hasn't eaten in 5 days and he is very hungry. He looked at the turtle and said "no, too much shell." The turtle was happy and left. He looked at the pig and said "no, too much fat." The pig ran away and was very happy. He looked at the donkey and said "I think I'll have donkey today." The donkey ran away because he was scared. The man died from hunger.

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Rick Ross is so fat, that he is fatter than someone who isn't as fat as he is.

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I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

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WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

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Why do i love this website? Because it is funny.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

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Why did george washington not make it to the prom? because george washington is dead

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are you MC Donald's because I'm lovin' it!

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How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

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What did the hand say to the face? Nothing because body parts cannot speak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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