What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

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Why should you never shower with a pokemon? Pokemon is a game for children. In doing so you would greatly disturb your child who is quite fond of pokemon

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

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why did the pancake eat a spanish holiday? Because a plane crashed into his condominium

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't know either.

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why did the child kill his mother because the child gave his mom AIDS

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

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What's worse than a dog peeing on your new flower garden? A terrorist attack.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

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What's big or small, can come in different colors, and would kill you if it was forced inside you? A refrigerator.

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What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

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What do you call a horny horse? A unicorn.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Hitler, time to shower!

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Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

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What's worse than dying in a car wreck with your family? You being the only one that dies.

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why did the owner of Google decide to name the company "Google"? google it..

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Why did the boy throw his alarm clock out of the window? Because he was angry at the alarm going off

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the boy fell, because he hit a bump.

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whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

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what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

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A white kid, a black kid, and an Asian kid all try out for the basketball team. Which one makes the team? All of them, because they are all very good.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops