Help me I need to know how to cook a human fetus by tomorrow does anyone know any good recipes?

I tried to play soccer a long time ago. I didn't score and managed to get red card... Then I realized it was not my thing

What's better than a $75 000 salary? 80 000 sticks of celery.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Nazi Nazi who? I am the mailman. I nazi your mailbox. Can I leave the letters on the front porch?

What do you call postman pat without a job? Pat.

Ding dong Who's there Electricity

why did tyler detweiler walk across the street? he didnt he has ceribral palsey

Q. What do you call a gay bar with no bar stools? A. A gay bar

I sas Ratzinger a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

Yo Mama's so fat Everyone is very concerned for her Health.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

Knock knock? Who's there? You have cancer.

What did the mouse say to the elephant that sat on him? Nothing, he died on impact.

your mom was so fat that she died.

Your momma's so stupid, she has a lower than average IQ!

Q:What's the difference between a lake? A: a tree, because motorcycles dont have doors... :) crf

Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

What do Michael Jackson and a throbbing, greasy, overcooked Shitake Mushroom have in common? Nothing. Just nothing at all.

What do you call a bunch of whiteguys running down a hill? An Avalanche What do you call a bunch of black guys running down a hill? A Mudslide What do you call a bunch of mexicans running down a hill? A Jailbreak

Run, Run, As fast as you can, You can't catch me, I'm in a car.

Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. -Are u a grapefruit? NO!

Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's dead.

what did the boy say to the alien? ET i will protect you. The alien slaps him for being stupid

A teen walks in on his parents having sex. He then vomits in his mouth and shuts the door.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...