Knock knock. Who's there? Conscience. Conscience who? Oh, sorry about that Hitler, you wouldn't know who I am.

What do you call potato salad in Iceland? Edible. The fact that it happens to be in Iceland doesn't make a difference

The blonde, brunette and,the red headed girls were at a store. When the blonde says......... im tired let's leave.

knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

yo Dawg I heard you like dogs... So I sent yo ass to prison and got an NFL contract

How many Dead Babies does it take fill a phone booth? There is an obvious epidemic going around causing millions of babies to die. This is no laughing matter and the mothers of these babies are probably going through therapy to get over their lost.

What did the convicted pedophile do to the ten year old boy? He molested him.

Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? No, we can't.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

How can you help Sally who is casually gets beaten by her farther every day? Just give £3 a month to the NSPCC

So coool! How did you do that dinosaur!?

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? "Get in the car Robin."

What's fat and ugly? Your face ... But only if its fat and ugly

Me: Ask me if I'm an orange. You: Are you an orange? Me: No

Whats green, furry and it stole christmas? A Robber with a Christmas tree on his back

So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

Roses are blue, Violets are purple, I like chicken. Do you like chicken?

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally raped and murder six's parents whilst six hid in the closet and watched.

How do you get a black guy down from your tree? You can't, because there aint any.

Why was the blonde so stupid? She suffers a severe case of retardation.

Your mom is so fat that she has to wear larger clothes than the average person.

Lil Wayne

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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