Whoever is reading this, I love you and I hope you have a great day.

What's worse than getting raped by a bear? Getting raped by two bears.

A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

If anything is possible try to staple water to a tree.

Q. What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? A. An ambulance due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.

Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

Showcasing you? Really? I am tired too, yeah its daytime here as well, sleep well then. Hey, by the way, when you where like posting a lot of weird comments, where you trying to impress me?

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

what do you get when you cross a puma and a turkey? A horrible abomination of life that begs to be killed.

do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

knock knock go away

what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

Why did the young boy drop his bus. He was hit by an ice cream.

Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

Q: What do you get when a black man dates a white lady? A: A perfectly acceptable relationship.

I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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