Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

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What happened after Will Ferrell took a dump? He wiped his ass and flushed.

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What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "cum" on your face.

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what's worse than me fucking your mom she enjoyed it

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Why was the blonde on the train tracks? Because she was tied up by a madman on crack.

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What's worse then ten dead babies in a barrel? The one at the bottom is still alive.

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you will like this because i am black.

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whats worse than being out in the cold? Being on the sun.

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Why did the muffin not eat the other muffin. Because muffins do not have a digestive system.

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What's long and black The unemployment line

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Caner.

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Why did the smoker die at a petrol station? He had lung cancer.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

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a man was beating his wife his wife asks him to stop he says no and continues beating her

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Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

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Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

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Your mom is so fat she probably has a body mass index of between 25 and 30 which is considered to be "overweight" but paradoxically is associated with fewer health risks by medical professionals.

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what did the white man call a black man that was awarded the job he applied for? He stated the man was a hard worker and deserved the job. Then he walked up to the man with a smile and congraduated him. Then he went home and commited suicide after he concluded he didnt deserve to live.

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What did the doctor say to the morbidly obese man? "You should get on a diet. It's a surprise you're even alive for so long with such a bad heart" The next day the man dies while eating celery.

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Your mom is so nerdy that she probably went to college, got her degree, then found a very successful job in a field that she finds interesting.

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A man walks into a bar and sees that the pianist is just twelve inches tall. He asks the bartender, ''How come you have a 12-inch pianist?'' The bartender replies, ''We have a genie in the back room. He'll answer all your wishes, but be careful, because he has a little trouble hearing.'' The man walks into the back room and asks the genie for a million bucks. The genie then gives him a million ducks. The man comes out and tells the bartender that the genie misheard his wish. The bartender says, ''Come on, now! Do you really think I asked for a 12-inch pianist?!''

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knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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