Why are they the "living" daylights?

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Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo. The prior sentence is a grammatically correct sentence in American English.

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What's worse than farting in front of your boyfriend? Farting on your boyfriends pillow and giving him pink eye.

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What's worse than finding out your husbands gay...........finding out he's gay with your brother"

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Why couldn't the married couple have sex? They were lesbians who were saving up a sex change.

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A amazing I idiots D discover S sex

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michaelangelo.

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what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

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Wife: "I suggest you check properly next time you lose your keys so that you find them quicker" Husband: "I suggest that next time I sit down and have a beer while I wait for Doc Martin and his time machine to give my keys back.

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Their was three black men that walked into a bar. They then ordered three drinks and had sex... I lied about walking into a bar

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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A lost young boy walks into a bar to ask for a map. The Bartender takes him into a room and rapes him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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what happened to the man who fell off the boat? He died!

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What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

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How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

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How do you get a clown to stop laughing? You throw an awe at it. Why did Sally fall off the swing? .....I missed the clown

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Sosiopath vs How I met your mother: BABABABABA BABABA RARARA LALALA ETC YOU GOT THE DRILL Kids, this is how I met your mother. I saw her at some store, I said "Hey sexy" She told me to fuck off, so I raped her, got out of prison years later, and kids, that is how I met your mother. ...Why I am leaving? Did I ever fucking say I was your father? I Just came here to tell you I raped and killed her after serving my time which was about 2 minutes, so kids, that is how I killed your mother. YOU ARE WELCOME BY THE WAY!Ungrateful kids. Moral of the story: If they are your kids, just say no and get away, and kill Robin for better television. Sociopath vs Grounded for life Moral: Shot the little kid, nobody will notice, not even his own family.Heck if you look at episode 34 you can see a tall handsome dude choking the life of a little boy in the background, and then letting him go just before he passes out and chokes him again? FUN FOR HOURS!

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People who find just saying 69 is the funniest thing ever.

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why was the 6 afraid of the 7? because 7 was a registered 6 offender.

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I scream, you scream, we all scream when we're chased by bears.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? A tragic drowning victim. And later, food for sharks, probably.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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