Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

Yo Mama is so fat that she should probably make an appointment with a bariatric surgeon.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Chris. Chris who? Wow, I thought we were better friends than that.

Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

So two people have conversation Luke: Hi Logan: Hi Snake eyes: ALHSKjagjdaoggj;jdjg;aj;kaj'dgajd Luke: You are so smart! (you retarted piece of poo) Logan: GAAAAAAAAAABBBBBBEEEEEEN

What did hitler get for christmas??? Roughly 3 million dead jews in the ashtray

Did you hear about the new XBOX releasing in Mexico. It's called the XBOX JUAN!!!

hi michael

What does two plus two equal? 4

What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

What did the dog say to the mailman? Woof.

What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

Whats the difference between a phone and a mexican? You can't dial a mexican.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it got hit by a truck before it got to the other side.

Yo mammas so fat she wears big clothes!

my egg roll

What's Rupert bear's middle name? the

Did you hear about the kidnapping in Milwaukee? They woke him up.

rarw

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...