Q: Are their Jews in Hell? A: No, because Hitlers there

How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

in a car crash an entire family is killed from death until they all die

What did the old person find on the internet? Porn.

Sammy bought 48 donuts. He ate 36. What was Sammy left with? Diabetes. Sammy was left with diabetes.

Hey i just raped you and this is crazy so delete my number and keep the baby

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

Why did Winston Churchill cross the road? Grave robbery has become a huge problem lately in the United Kingdom.

Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

How do you scare a little boy? You tell him everyone he loves was shot to death by you and then kick his guardian .

Why did Kim Kardashian's and Kris Humphries marriage last so long? It didn't

A man starts acting weird in a resturant, the waiter says "whats the problem sir?" The man says "I'm choking and I just died."

do yo know what's funnier than getting on a hidden camera show? Nope! it's just chuck testa

A shark ate your mom

Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

Q: How many elephants can fit inside a Volkswagen Beetle? A: Four.

Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

What does the kitty say to his owner? you've CAT to KITTEN right MEOW

What happened when the old man fell off the roof? He died....

A man walks into a pizza place and orders a pizza. When he got the pizza, he saw it had pepporonis on it. He liked that, so he ate the pizza.

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

What walks on the three legs? Martin, he was born with a tragic birth defect and struggles to make a living.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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