Q:Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? A:He slipped and fell. Q2:Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A2:He was stapled to the first monkey. Q3:Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A3:Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the boy get nothing from Santa on Christmas? His parents died the night before!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Whats dark, has an opening, and guys like to go into it? A Vagina

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb? NONE A YO F******G BUSINESS!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do an asian, a black man, and a Mexican all have in common? They all belong minorites that at one time have been outcast by society

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why are asians such bad drivers? Cause they constantly have their eyes closed.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q) What is black, white, and red all over? A) A zebra that just became the kill of a hungry carnivore

thumb_up thumb_down -14

So a guy walked into the doctors and said, "It hurts when I poke my leg like this." The doctor said, "Well don't poke your leg like that."

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the chicken cross the road? He actually planned to visit his family on the other side, but unfortunately he did not look both ways so was involved in a terrible car accident. His family now mourns their loss.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are red violets are blue next thing you know my D*** is in you

thumb_up thumb_down -14

69 cents for a rainbow donut shaped as a 69....

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Will I be watching The Voice tonight? no.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Bala: Brid why don't you drink? Brid: When I was in college I was in students council. Whenever my friends called me during night, I used to go pick them up. Once we were working late in college and in the morning my hair was all ruined...

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a feminist that believes that all women have just as many rights as men? Stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did your mom get for christmas ? A stairstepper.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the boy have pink skin at night? Because he did not put on a sufficient amount of sunscreen that morning. This is also known as sunburn.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What is E.T. short For? So he can fit on ship

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What is worse then your car getting hijacked? A 900 pound man eating a Donut.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Did you hear about the kid from Oklahoma? Yeah, he died.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I read a haiku. It was honestly quite good. That's basically it.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops