joe: guess what. Bob: what. Joe: nothing I just wanted to talk

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

What do you call a black man? Rob

What's worse than a black guy? Two black guys....and a dead white man.

What do you call someone who thinks they're funny but in reality isn't? Adam chapali Knock knock Who's there? NOT adam chapali

A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are on the run from the police. They see a barn, and decide to hide inside it. They find three burlap sacks, and each hide in one. The police enter the barn, arrest each of the girls, and sentence them to life imprisonment for murder.

there was a turkey sandwhich..... a ham sandwhich.... and a bologna sandwhich..... they had a short conversation before they were eatin by a fat kid

roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

what does the monster eat after going to the dentist? the dentist

Why did the retarded guy follow the 7 year old? Because he's a stalker.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms. Why doesnt she have arms? they got bit off by a shark. Knock knock. Who's there? Not the girl.

A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

So a man walks into a bar... ouch

Yesterday, upon the stair, I met a man who wasn't there. I saw him there again today; I've been sectioned. [L]

Why couldn't the pirate watch the violent movie? Because pirates died along time ago

was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

Q: What is the difference between a moose and a cow? A: How they're spelled.

What's the difference between dead babies and punching bag? No one makes jokes about punching bags.

why did the black man shoot himself? because he commited a crime and was sorry for what he had done

A bar walking into a mans house, then the blonde says stupid words like why did the chicken of the sea cross the road and pigeons go moo moo like a cow.

Knock Knock. Who's there? An Alzheimers's patient. An Alzheimers's patient who? To get to the other side!

How can you tell if a duck is behind you? Turn around

If god himself had a religion he would be a self centered bastard.

I am black. And i will beat your children. At checkers. They can be the red .

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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