What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

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When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

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And then Jesus turned the water into wine. Some did not approve of this miracle "masta, whut is da reezon you did aint make this into tha coolaid? Bible files: Directors cut.

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What's worse than cancer? Nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know you have to ask the chicken if you speak chicken

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Why couldn't the woman give her sister a present? Because she just got eaten by zombies.

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how do u make a snooker table laugh? TICKLE ITS BALLS HAHA

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A mormon walks into a bar.

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Why was the Jewish man celebrating cinco de mayo? Because he likes other cultures and Mexican food Except pork

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Insert joke that isn't even an anti joke = The new jokes on anti joke now.

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yo mama is so fat, she's obeise

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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

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Why did Johnny play piano with one hand? Because he lost his other one in a mining accident when he was 10. Johnny lives in rural Perú so he had to support his 6 younger brothers and sisters by working in a child factory.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Q. What is the worlds biggest lie A. I have read and agree to the terms of service ?

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What is black and hangs on a rope next to a rebel flag in my back yard? A tire swing for my redneck kids to swing on.

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What do you call a really bad band? One with a poor guitar player, a bad bass player, sloppy drums, obnoxious vocals, and all of the songs sound the same. Or Nickelback.

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if you press the thumbs up button nyan cat is going to visit you tonight

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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you know whats better than lemonade? sex

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Yo Momma so fat, that she need the atlantic to take a bath!

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what did the dog say to the cat nothing because dogs can`t talk and if they could talk the cat wouldn`t understand him because cats can`t talk

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What's the difference between a horse and a gorilla? Their penis size. Horses have relatively large penises, while gorillas are known to have the smallest penises proportional to their body size.

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A man walked into a bar. He left in a body bag.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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