When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

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What do you call someone trying to be funny? An anti-comedian.

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Why was the dog sweating? It was locked in a car on a hot day.

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Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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How can you outsmart Stephen Hawking? Steal the wheels of his chair and replace them with a dolphin.

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how many mexicas does it take to.... on wait there done

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Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

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What do you call a alcaholic walking down the street..... Roadkill

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what is the best invention ever created ? ............ PORN !!!!

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Why was the teenage girl pregnant? She got raped by her dad.

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A man was shot. He died.

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Why was the little girl crying Someone therew a dump truck at her

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What do you get if you cross a bomb expert, and a homophobe a blow job

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Why did the boy fall off the swing?

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How do you know when it is a Mexican's birthday? They are walking around with "happy birthday" balloons.

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What's the difference between black guy and a bucket of shit? The bucket

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Why not zoidburg? Because Zoidburg is a alien from another planet and the human population is probally afraid to talk to him do to the potential danger of alien contact.

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Why did the boy let the falling brick hit him in the head? He had no legs, so he could not move

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I've got a dig bick. You that read wrong. You also read the second sentence wrong.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It passed away in its sleep.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. One of them was white.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a Triceratops.

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What's round, has two hands, and tells time? Some fat guy I know, with a watch.

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Q. What is ginger and ginger? A. a ginger

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops