Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? He likes bungie jumping, and wanted to cheer himself up by doing one of his favorite hobbies

Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

Why did grandpa fall asleep naked on a bench? Because his mental condition is slowly deteriorating which is causing him to not be able to properly determine what is and isn't ok to do in public.

karn chevalier

why did the girl stop laughing? there was nothing to laugh about.

Why did the KFC worker dislike his job? He was paid lower than minumum wage due to the plummeting economy.

My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

A car with four Mexicans drives off of a cliff. What's the bad news? They were my friends.

how much swag could a swagchuck chuck, if a swagchuck could chuck swag?

Why did the fish fly It didn't

Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

So yesterday i walked into a bar, so what?

What happens when you rub two penises together? Gay sex.

what happened to those kids sandusky raped? who cares

Why couldnt the girl braid her hair? She had cancer

Q: What do you call a gay man in a... A: Keith.

knock knock Dave's not here.

Did you know Helen Keller had a playground in her backyard? Neither did she

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

A mormon walks into a bar. The Bartender says "What can I get you" The Mormon says "Sparkling Water please. In my religion we don't drink alcohol."

Why did the bear turn red? Because he was emBEARessed. Nah just kidding, a hunter shot him.

A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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