VITAMIN C!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

KCLTLMBAIMWSSHTCAWGAHW

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Albino African Americans

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the homeless man get for his 34th birthday? 34 years of regret.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the floor. How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail the other one to the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

your momma's so fat that she weighs a lot

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's red and a cow? Red cow

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: Why did Suzie fall out the swings? A: She had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.....

thumb_up thumb_down +11

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis. -Rivrawr

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because women have the same rights as men thanks to the 19th amendment and sexism needs to die.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the muffin not eat the other muffin. Because muffins do not have a digestive system.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's long and black The unemployment line

thumb_up thumb_down +11

whats the difference between a thousand dead babies and a porshe? i dont have a porshe in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a Jew picking up a quarter on the street? A very nice man because a homeless man just dropped that and he was trying to return it. Rob W

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was the boy crying? Because him and his sister were sent to an orphanage.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Knock Knock Who's there? You know you really should have a safer way of finding out who is really on the other side. Now a days it's just not safe to ask, "who's there". I mean it could have been, Milkman, Plummer, or worst a Land Shark!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops