What's the difference between a Jew and a Fire extinguisher? One puts out a fire the other one fuels it.

They usually say "fuck" the police! But no one wants to fuck the police...

What do you call a chair in the middle of the road? A danger to drivers.

How do you make a dog hate you for the rest of its life? Steal its bone and beheaded it.

why did Susay fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms

What do gamers call an abortion on quintuplets? PENTAKILL!!!

Why did the shrimp refuse to share? Because he was a little shellfish.

How did Billy tip the cow? He didn't, cows are animals and that would be wrong.

Do you want to hear some bad news? My wife just died Do you want to hear some good news? I'm single

You are so ugly that for Halloween you had to trick or treat by phone.

Which of the following is the reason the Titanic sunk. Select all that apply. A. Iceberg B. No radar C. Late warning D. Put your hands on me Jack E. This ship can't sink F. Over by the bed, the couch G. God himself can't sink this ship Z. All the above X. None of the above Q. Why are you still reading

What do you call an armless, legless man hanging on a wall? Art.

I'd love to submit an anti joke, but unfortunatley I don't own a computer.

What do a grape and an elephant have in common? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

Whats the difference of how a hot blonde and an ugly red head got in to the same collage with a sex addicted dean? Nothing they were both very smart inteligent women with respectables GPA

I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

Why did the chicken cross the road? ...because chickens love to confound people.

What happenend after the chicken tried to cross the road? a KFC opend

Where is aodhan's ma? Jail, she was cought with a bag full of the white powder.

What happened to the mentaly challenged person is walking down the street? He pooped on the sidewalk and got escorted to his house

What did the father give to his daughter? AIDS.

Thank you very much for being so kind to me throughout the years. I have never known a better man. Rest in peace.

How do you make a person laugh? Tell a good joke How do you make them cry? Tell a sad story How do you make them cry and laugh at the same time? Tell a bad joke

Yo momma is so stupid people make fun of her for her learning disability

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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