So yesterday i walked into a bar, so what?

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How do you kill a hobo? Throw a penny off a clif.. How do you kill another hobo? Tell him the penny's still down there

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Your mother is so fat; I love fat fat people.

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How do you make a white girl commit suicide? Bully her.

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What would have happend if martin Luther king was white? I don't know he wasn't so it's irrelevant

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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How do you get a Jew to jump off a cliff? You kidnap his family and threaten to kill them if he doesn’t.

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

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What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

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A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

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A Muslim walks into a bar. No-one survived the blast.

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What's red, white, and black, and spins around and around? A penguin in a blender

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Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? ... A boy played in mud.

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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Did I tell you about when I hit a cat with my car? No, what happened? I hit a cat.

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What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

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whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

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What did the slutty blonde get her boyfriend for Valentine's Day? Nothing because she had died of AIDS months ago.

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why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

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Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

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Q: What's black, white, and red all over? A: A horribly maimed zebra.

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DO U KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD BIRD BIRD, BIRD IS THE WORD? DON'T U KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD? EVERYOBODY KNOWS THAT THE BIRD IS THE WORD! Oh, no i did not know that the bird was the word.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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