How do you help someone stop drowning You take your foot off the back their head.

What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

A white man is running away from a black man. Because they are Playing tag. A gaming involving to touch the other person

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

What did the 12 year old boy get for Christmas? Herpes

There are fewer coppers on sundays. As well as criminality.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the sidewalk he was on does not.

Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He had a stroke.

Roses are red Violets are blue I love you a lot But you're dead and I have unhealthy necrophiliac tendencies

Me and a pig had sex, beastieality.

What do you call a Mexican policeman? Officer.

Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

Hey what did you do on The weekend??? I got hit by a bus!

What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

You ask your friend if they want to hear a joke when they say yes tell them that thought you had a joke

"bluar blah blah blarRR/ the stupid pointless part" dead people/ animals/ objects can't talk/ drive/ operate compueter, lol I'm so focken funni

Ben Corbishley

What happened to Johnny when he tripped over his shoelace? He was shot by the man who was following him.

whats then difference between a jew and a pizza ? A pizza doesnt scream when its put in the oven .

What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

whose a bitch? ian doyle's a bitch

What's worse than getting your dog neutered? You being the dog.

What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock eater,

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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