HOw do u DEFeat thE hatErsz shitted on em

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knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

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Why did the old lady cross the road? Why not.

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What would have happend if martin Luther king was white? I don't know he wasn't so it's irrelevant

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What's green fury has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you. A pool-table

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

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Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

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why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Q: If you are debating whether to smoke marijuana, consider: what will your mother say when she finds your corpse? A: As a relatively harmless and non-addictive substance, Marijuana was most likely not the cause of my child’s death. It was probably AIDS.

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A thought for the day: Life is like a game of chess. In the constant struggle for power, control and safe positions it makes no difference whether one plays white or black. As long as everything is planned and one stays a few moves ahead, everything will work out. Just don't annoy the queen, or she may send some very irate knights to fork you or a bishop to flank you. [L]

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Why aren't there any black flesh-colored bandages? Good question.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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What's big fat and ugly? A monster

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Pianos.

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hmm, thinking, thinking, SNAPPLE!

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a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

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What is red and has two legs? Half a cat.

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Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

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Q: How do you confuse a blond A: You don't they are born that way

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. -Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Not Sally.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops