Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

thumb_up thumb_down +25

AAAnd that did not totally send a rush of sweet endorphin's up my spine, I think myself of as really really blunt, I value individualism rather than complete assimilation, I think that, if people want to hear my opinion, they ask me, and if they want to hear what they want to hear, they can ask... Pff, anybody else. I end up insulting a lot of people literally asking for it, but moments like these make it all worth it. I am also extremely superstitious, the catchphra states "Grain of salt" so I wont take your comment completely... I am just screwing around...

thumb_up thumb_down +23

knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

thumb_up thumb_down +23

"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Whats worst than reading the 8th anti joke that ends with the Holocaust? The one where it ends with someone getting hit by a fridge for the 9th time.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why can't Michel Jackson play chess? He's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Do you want to hear a joke?!?!?!?!?!?! A happy orphan

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the really unfunny man buy AntiJoke The Book??? It was a good deal and only $9.99.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Knock knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave was beginning to get very scared of his best friend at this time, so he ran away panicking.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Whoever is reading this, I love you and I hope you have a great day.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Q: Why are Cats called Lolcat? A: They forgot to put "i" between l & c

thumb_up thumb_down +23

if you are reading this your wasting your time

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A kid walks into a bar, everyone fled the bar because they were all afraid of goats

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops