What's the difference between me and an animal? I'm human

Where did Sarah go during the bombing? Everywhere.

Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

Only people of high intelligence can laugh at anti jokes.

whats the best kind of chocolate bar? a larsbar

You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

A man walks into a bar and sees that the pianist is just twelve inches tall. He asks the bartender, ''How come you have a 12-inch pianist?'' The bartender replies, ''We have a genie in the back room. He'll answer all your wishes, but be careful, because he has a little trouble hearing.'' The man walks into the back room and asks the genie for a million bucks. The genie then gives him a million ducks. The man comes out and tells the bartender that the genie misheard his wish. The bartender says, ''Come on, now! Do you really think I asked for a 12-inch pianist?!''

Why did the chicken cross the road? Scientists are still unable to fully understand the brain functioning of chickens enough to comprehend their motives for doing such a thing.

Hi, how are you doing? Good, yourself? Fine, thanks. Have a nice day. You too, bye.

How did the blonde trip the brunette? She stuck out her foot

What do you call a horse with bread on its ears? Boris, because that's his name.

There was once a really smart Hufflepuff.

Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

i like punching orphans in the face, you wanna know why? what are they gonna do? tell their parents???

What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? Boyscouts came back from camp

What do you call a mailman who doesn't deliver mail? Unemployed

Pianos.

Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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