Why does the Green Giant's vegetables taste funny? He stands over his peas and corn.

how do you kill a blond? there are many ways but every one of them is illegal and could be criminally chargeable.

Roses are red, Violets are Blue Last night was amazing, I have Aids

Why did the woman eat her sandwich. She was hungry.

A wise man once told me that friends are like cookies. He was a cannibal.

So a woman walks out of a kitchen, she is instantly mauled by a bear.

why did the child kill his mother because the child gave his mom AIDS

How many Santa Clauses does it take to change a light bulb? Santa Claus isn't real.

Roses are red, lemons are sour, open your legs and give me an hour.

3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? People that make dead baby jokes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? no. He didn't either.

A duck walks into a bar, clearly ignoring the 'No Ducks Allowed' sign that had been placed in the window to prevent comedic scenarios.

roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

Whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? One is blonde and one is brunette.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

So a man and his wife were in a horrible car accident. The man died, so why isn't the wife mourning his death? Because she is also dead. But, do you know who did mourn and cry over this horrible tragedy? Their children, other family members, and friends.

What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

whats the difference between a ladybug and a jew? there is none

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzhiemers Wait, who are you

Where did Jonathon go after he died? - Burger King, he died from diabetes

An obese man walked into McDonalds and ordered 6 Big Macs. He proceeded to walk to a booth in the back corner and eat them all. Turns out he was white.

Yo momma's so fat, that she got baptised in Sea World.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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