Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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what is green and red and goes 100 miles per hour? frog in a blender

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What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Cancer. What did he get for his birthday? He didn't make it that far...

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how do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The fridge is on its side, the door is torn off, and the ruined food scattered all over the floor. Not to mention there is an elephant in your kitchen.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

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Roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers the middle one is for you.

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You know why no ones tried to kill Obama ? Picture him in an escalade!

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Why couldnt the pirate get into the movies? Because it was rated pg-13 and his parents didnr likw him watching that

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Click here for free sandwich.

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What do you call a man who never farts in public? A private tooter!

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Where does Charlie Sheen buy his clothes? Winners

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Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

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What sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler.

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The Piglodocus has been featured in films such as "Jurassic Pork" and "Land before Swine".

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1/= |_| (4|\| /234|) 7|-|15 (411 */0|_|/2531/= 4 1337 |-|4><0/2!!!1!

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What happened to the black guy that rammed his ankle against the bed frame? Yelled profusely until it stopped hurting.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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My friend thinks he's smart, He said that onions are the only food that make you cry. So I threw a coconut at his face.

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Q: What is the difference between a smart blonde and a UFO? A: One is a human while the other is an unidentified flying object.

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why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

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A praying mantis is very graceful

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Sidney Crosby walks into a bar. Except its a metal bar like a pole so he gets another concussion.

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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