Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas?? - Cancer

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Yo mama's so fat she got baptized in Sea World.

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What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? You don't have to cook an onion to eat it.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Doctor! Doctor! There's a fly in my soup! Gross.

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Knock knock. Whos there Time to get a watch

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape his burning car wreck.

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What has nine arms and sucks? Four children with two arms snacking on a lollipop, and one child with one arm snacking on a lollipop.

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steven hawking walks into a bar just kidding he has a horrable disiese preventing him from walking

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What do Lincoln, JFK, and Barack Obama all have in common? They were all president of the United States of America and are relatively good people.

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff.

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What's big or small, can come in different colors, and would kill you if it was forced inside you? A refrigerator.

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hey jimmy! hey bob -.- jimmy, pls pls explain how to do this.. ): see your mom? yea... do it like we did her (OOOHHHH!)

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Yo momma so fat she saw a yellow bus full of white kids and said, "STOP THAT TWINKIE!!"

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

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Wait a moment, I will see what I can do.

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Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

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What kind of Mexican makes no money? A Mexican without a job.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall?? A: It depends on how hard you throw them!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because i was on the other side and we were going to catch a movie

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops