"Knock-knock." "Come in, sorry that the doorbell is broken."

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Why was Sally in a wheelchair? Her abusive father beat her repeatedly with a rake.. Then as she crawled out the door to try and get help, the abusive father took his Dodge Ram and ran over her legs reapeatedly. Then began to slap her. Luckily, a vigilante saw the whole thing and slaughtered the father with an axe and carefully escorted Sally to the hospital. After a couple of weeks of beautiful and extraordinary care, Sally made a full recovery and was able to leave.. and all patients have to leave in a wheelchair

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Why didn't the jew eat pork? He was vegetarian.

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What happens when you cut a body in half? An erection.

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Q: If you are debating whether to smoke marijuana, consider: what will your mother say when she finds your corpse? A: As a relatively harmless and non-addictive substance, Marijuana was most likely not the cause of my child’s death. It was probably AIDS.

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what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

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what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

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What's a Gigawat? I made it up.

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How do you unload a truck full of dead babies? With a pitch fork.

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Your dad is so gay, he lovingly marries another man and selflessly adopts you.

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Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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What's Brown and Sticky? A Stick

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Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

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A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

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Why did thomas make a big mess on the ground? Beacuse he fell of a cliff

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

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Roses are red violets are blue this poem makes no sense refrigerator.

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cats, swimming, northpole ,sky, park , tree , bench, anti joke. shut up you have a skin disease!

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Someone just commented on my joke! ... oh wait it was myself

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Why did Billy kill Joey? Joey had sex with Billy's wife... and Billy wanted revenge.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Don't matter what you call him he ain't gonna come.

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What is Rebecca Blacks favorite resurant? T.G.I Fridays...

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In a tangential universe Crispin Glover is the head of scientology

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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