Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. okay? Why did the chicken cross the road? why? because its motor skills allowed it to cross. dude, seriously? What did Jimmy's grandmother get him for Christmas? What?. Nothing she died two years ago. that's horrible. When did she die? On his birthday. Dude, stop! Wait how did she die? Fine, How? She was driving down the road and swerved to miss a chicken. oh. And what did she hit? UGGG What? Thankfully not me. because I wasn't the tree. :0 oooooooooooooh

Why did the chicken cross the playground. He didn't. chickens are unsanitary to have in schools

Why is the sky blue? You like men.

What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers. -Del Primm

Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

How many black people does it take to solve a complex physics equation? Trick question

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

What do you call three Asian people eating a cat? A tragic last resort for a starving family.

what is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 11 dead babies in a trash can

Justin Beiber walks into a bar. The bartender does not serve him because he is not the legal drinking age yet.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.... I hate your guts.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

How do you make a tree angry Overall trees have no sense of emotion therefore it is impossible to anger a tree.

Q: what did the man say to the woman? A: hi

Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

What's funny about your mom? Nothing, she died three weeks ago.

whats worse than a 6 dead babies in a dumpster? You were babysitting them.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

hmm, thinking, thinking, SNAPPLE!

How much does a dead baby weight? the same amount when it was alive!

the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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