I like my women like bacon. Greasy and full of wrinkels

'Doctor, doctor, I think I'm a pair of curtains' Doctor prescribes antipsychotics.

Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Certainly not Jimmy.

Roses are red, My name is Dave, This poem makes no sense, Microwave.

99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer, take one down pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall. 10 minutes into the song one man succumbs to alcohol poisoning.

A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because its a horse. It then poops on the floor and leaves

why did the chicken cross the road? because yo mama so fat and the pig ate my poop

What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked: "Why the long face?" The horse said: "My wife just died."

How do you find your way out of the impossible maze? You don't.

Why did the man cross the road? Because he couldn't get his dick out of the chicken

Yo momma was so ugly that everybody died.

What have you got there? Hitler's gas bill... Oh.. don't show him that, he'll be furious Whys that? He can't read.

What happened when a Black man ran into a white supremacist? They exchanged insurance information

Knock Knock? Whos there? Not Madeleine McCann.

How do you make a unicorn? Jab a stick through a pink horse and name it Liam

What worse than a baby nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

Blacks

MRLSIXBWBSOVODKSHAIFKQJXIGJNRMWKSJDIVIVKEBWBEBKGKBODJWBEBJRRKFOBPBPDJWVECTNYLLNNIFUDJEBWKSOXOVOFJSBSBDKCKFKTKEBEJDLDOFIDKDJDHDBENSMSKSKSKSKSJDJDJSNRNTNTKDPQPWJSHCHCJDNEBBSJSKC

How many pancakes can you fit into a gopher hole? Red - because ice cream doesn't have any bones.

Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

I went out back to bury my hoe.. with a hoe..

What did the frat guy drink after he lifted? A various assortment of beverages that were chilled at a cool 66 degrees.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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