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A man walks into a bar with a giant banana as a head and the bartender asks why he has a giant banana as a head and the man says get me a drink and i will explain, the bartender got the man a drink and he started to explain why, so i found this real nice golden lamp and i rubbed it next thing you know this genie pops out and he said i get three wishes the first one he wishes for unlimited wealth with a snap of the genies fingers the wish came true next he wished to be the most handsome man ever with a spin and a snap the wish came true but this is where it went wrong, I said to the genie and i cant believe he got me with this one (because genies always put a twist on things) i said: i wish for my head to be a banana

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Roses are rose, violets are violet, that's just a fact, I've got aspergers.

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"Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave."

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Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

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There's a tray of muffins in the oven. One muffin says, "man it's hot in here!" Another muffin says, "holy shit! A talking muffin!"

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A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

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What did the lady say after she returned home from the grocery store? "Oh no! I forgot the milk!"

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Im black and want attention. I also love fried chicken and love Africa call for a good, African-American time..... Im black 4025406623

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why did the fat woman die? ... because she tried to commit suicide and the ceiling collapsed on her.

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I have a toaster. I have two subway coupons and a handful of pubic hair equal trade baby

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What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

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I have read and agreed to the terms of service

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Q: Why did the little girl fall from the swing? A: Because she didn't have arms. Q2: And why did she fall from the swing again? A2: Because she tried to get on it again.

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What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a wall? Ripping them off.

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What did the little black boy get for Christmas? Hopefully something nice.

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A: How do you piss off a female pilot? Q: Kill her family

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how many dicks can you fit into mia khalifa's ass

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"Doctor, Doctor, Help I feel like a pair of curtains" "I've got some cream for that".

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Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

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My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. I guess I make a good milkshake.

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A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

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What's worse than a bruise in your knee? A bruise in your other knee. And what is worse than that? The Holocaust. And what is worse than that? A second Holocaust, much bigger, with much more casualties.

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No, I had no idea, nor did I know that Nero means Black or Darkness until I searched it up some weeks ago. No, I would never photoshop anything, I mean sure I am the girl/woman thing with the big tits, but that`s like all I got going... Oh and yeah I use glasses sometimes because these contact lenses become itchy after a while and stuff.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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