Why was six afraid of seven? Because chad makes babies cry.

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? You apparently are not a fan of lemons what so ever, so you then throw them away, not knowing what to expect.

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Q: What did the boy say to the girl? A: Wanna go to homecoming?

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what cuts the grass on christmas eve and lives in mexico? JP I lied about Mexico jackin it in san diego

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A black guy, a white guy, and a mexican are on a boat, stranded in the middle of the ocean. Feeling a bit hot due to the above average temperature of an early april afternoon, the white guy and the mexican strip down to enjoy a refreshing dip in the water a few feet from the boat. The black guy, feeling a bit left-out and perhaps even envious at the apparent fun of the other two, speaks up "Hey fellas, do you think one of you could come sit in the boat so it doesn't float away so that maybe I can enjoy the water too?" Hearing this, the white guy and the mexican look at each other utterly astonished. Grasping for a rebuttal, the white guy gathers some courage and says "Do you really think that's a good idea?... You JUST finished your sandwich."

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what did the left eye say to the right eye? "eye" see you

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Knock Knock whose there your parents your parents who your parents just got malled by a hobo with an axe.

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Knock Knock, Who's There? Not Ann Frank because she died in the Holocaust along with 6 million other innocent people.

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it smells like up dog in here. whats that?

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-Knock Knock? -Who's There? -David Baxter. -David Baxter Who? -Wha- What? What do you mean "David Baxter who?" We were best friends in high school. YOU WERE THE BEST MAN AT MY WEDDING!! *David Baxter proceeds to cry, as he doesn't know of his dear friend's Alzheimer's disease*

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Why did the sperm cross the road? It didn't, as sperm cells have tails not legs, and are therefore incapable of crossing roads.

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roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, some dont

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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Why is the chicken afraid of the tiger? Chickens are inferrior to tigers and could easily be eaten.

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What do you call an elephant mixed with a rhino? A freak.

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How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

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what is worse than the holocaust. interracial relationship, cough..... oli

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In space, no one can hear you scream. Which means Xenomorphs are deaf.

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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So this squirrel is walking across the road when a HUGE truck comes and smashes him beneath the tire.

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why was allison crying? because her mom's dead.

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"You just went and made a new dinosaur?" "And due to its well-developed core muscles the staff behind Jurassic World has called it - 'ABDOMINUS PEX'." "That's a stupid name."

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A hindu and a muslim walk into a bar. They start arguing over their different fundamental religious beliefs and then considering it is an american bar, an american christian extremist quickly shoots them both for being " from that part of the world"

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why did Dayrl win the wheelchair race? Because he had working legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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