Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

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Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

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friend' Knock Knock! you; no one home go away

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What did the mouse say to the elephant that sat on him? Nothing, he died on impact.

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I don't usually drink beer, but when I do it usually doesn't take much for me to feel the effects of intoxication.

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How do you kill batman? you stab him through the heart

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How do you make your children nice? You dont have any.

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Why do I exist? Because my mom gave birth to me.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Sandwich.

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Q:what do you call someone who spends 7 hours a day playing video games? A: Someone who takes pride and joy from gaming

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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every cloud has a silver lining

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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what's gray, rectangular, and provides a good time? your mother's sex tape.

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why did the koala fall out of the tree? it was dead

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why couldnt the baby walk through the door? because it had a javeline through its head.

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How do you make a snake blink? You can't

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What do you do to a brain dead man to get his money? Pull the plug.

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that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

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What's worse than a spilled ice cream cone? 2 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 2 spilled ice cream cones? 3 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 3 spilled I've cream cones? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? 4 spilled ice cream cones.

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How do you get a ninja to do a backflip? Ask him nicely.

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I'm 23, just like most people my age.

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A sixty Year old man walks into a bank to rob it. He tells the bank teller, "Take the money and put it into a bag!" The teller told him, "Sir I don't have a bag." So the old man turns around and walks out.

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How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops