What is the difference between a baleen whale and a black guy? One speaks and one says EEEEEEERRRROOOOOWWOWOWOWOOWRR!

What do you call a man in a wall? Stuck.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Holy guacamole Pineapples

Why did the shrimp refuse to share? Because he was a little shellfish.

Luck is not real. But the dismembered body in my basement is.

Why was Charles bleeding, because he was stabbed in the head with a needle

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

What did the wall say to the floor? Nothing.

What do you do when your dish washer breaks? divorce her.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Fire extinguisher? One puts out a fire the other one fuels it.

Q: What do you call a black person who got hit by a truck? A: Dead

What has four legs but can't walk? A tranquilized bear

Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. "Where's my tractor?"

What state is high in the middle and round on both ends? Onorth Chiarolinao

How did Billy tip the cow? He didn't, cows are animals and that would be wrong.

What do you call a chair in the middle of the road? A danger to drivers.

How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

They usually say "fuck" the police! But no one wants to fuck the police...

What did the blonde say to the brunette? I just ate a chicken panini.

How do you make a dog hate you for the rest of its life? Steal its bone and beheaded it.

Knock Knock. Who's There? I have cancer.

why did the little boy drop his icecream? he was hit by a train

What do gamers call an abortion on quintuplets? PENTAKILL!!!

why did Susay fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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