Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he's CHICKEN.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

like if your cool

thumb_up thumb_down -31

There was an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman. Now there's millions of them. And women too.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken is now getting flowers for her dead children that got hit buy multiple cars, also the chicken is a human mother.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

why was the boy sad his whole family just died in a plane crash

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why was the drunk man in jail? He had lost touch with himself because his wife cheated on him the previous night and to add to the fact she took his clothes so public nudity would be a problem.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What do you call Chuck Norris being killed? This is impossible so we are not give it a name.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

learn. advance!

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A man is standing on the street corner waiting for the bus. As it pulls up he steps on and pays his fare while he whistles to his iPod.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

what are the best kind of bees none they sting and hurt like hell

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What do you call a half man half manatee? A manatee

thumb_up thumb_down -33

The teacher asks Timmy "why is your cat at school today?" Timmy says, crying, "Because I heard my daddy say to my mommy, 'I'm going to eat that pussy when the kids leave.' so I'm saving him!"

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why was the man sad? Cause his dog fell off a cliff

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Nice ass. Too bad it's cracked in the middle, though.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Here's a riddle... A cowboy rides into town on saturday, stays for three days, and leaves on saturday... How does he do it? Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... OH... I'M DONE NOW...

thumb_up thumb_down -33

in·fun·dib·u·lum? 1. a funnel-shaped organ or part. 2. a funnel-shaped extension of the hypothalamus connecting the pituitary gland to the base of the brain. 3. a space in the right ventricle at the base of the pulmonary artery.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Your mama's so fat, she can't even find clothes that fit her well.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What's worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What's black and white and in the desert? Tourists being held hostage by a tribe.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Whats the difference between a muslim and a christian? They believe in different things.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Q.How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb? A.1

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops