1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

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A few people were put in a room with 5 doors and 4 were a certain death one was freedom and they had to choose a door to go in not knowing which was freedom the first person went in the door on the far left. He got raped by Michael Jackson. The second guy opened the door on the far right. He got in a room entirely made of ice cream. He ate all of it and got such a brain freeze his brain froze. The third and final guy turned around and noticed a door labeled exit. He exited the room and continued his life as a normal person

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who else is on here?

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What did the two homosexual dolphins do when nobody was around? They continued on their way because neither of them had met.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he died.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because its rayseans favorite number

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Why are stand up comedians called stand up comedians? Because they are standing up while telling jokes, dumby.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had very recentley made his escape from a nearby farm, of which was owned by a man close to dying of a Rhabdoid Tumor. His family was in mourn.

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What's worse than eating a baby? Eating two babies filled with maggots.

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why didn't Lebron James give me a fourth quarter?...he forgot his wallet at home and didn't have any spare change.

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In an effort to bond, the American president and North Korean Supreme Leader place a bet on a football game. If the President was correct, the Supreme Leader would have to buy them a drink, and vice versa. The game is close but in the end the President's bet wins. He asks for the drink, but the Supreme Leader refuses. An argument breaks out, and lasts for several hours. Eventually the Supreme Leader becomes too infuriated, and leaves. So the next day, North Korea declares war on America and launches nuclear missiles towards them, millions of lives are lost, and the world descends into anarchy.

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What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

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A young black man walks into a KFC. He takes a quick stop in the bathroom and continues on the road to his ivy league college.

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How long does it take for light to travel a light-year ? A year.

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whats the difference between a black and a bunk bed? a bunk bed can support 2 kids.

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whats the difference between boyscouts and a jew? boyscouts come back from camp.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

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Your mamas so stupid, her IQ is lower than the average person of her age group.

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

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whats worst then geting a used condom put in your mouth geting wraped by mario then lugi

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Just want to know where I will be dipping my... MANFLESH!

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How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

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Old Mother Hubbard Went to the cupboard, To give the poor dog a bone: When she came there, The cupboard was bare, And so the poor dog had none. So Old Mother Hubbard was reported for animal cruelty

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Why did the man walk instead of taking the bus? Because he felt like getting a heathy workout.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops