What did one cow say to the other cow? Moo

What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

Why did the frog die? Because I stapled it onto a boy's face.

Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

a man was shot.... he died

have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower? No? well it must have been hiding pretty well.

Why did the black man buy fried chicken? Because it wasn't free.

Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I didn't use protection So here's your baby

What's worse than a bug in your soup? Getting shot in the stomach.

One time, as a dare, John was forced to eat 5 king size chocolate bars, 3 cakes, 8 Oreo Milkshakes, and 7 packages of Krispy Kreme Donuts. As a result, John has diabetes.

How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

What type of jobs do black people have? That depends entirely on their qualifications and suitability to the relevant role.

How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: 7 is a registered sex offender.

why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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