Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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What's as hard as a rock? A rock

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A white guy, a black guy, an Asian guy, and a Hispanic guy walks into a bar. The white guy orders a beer, the black guy orders a shot of vodka, the Asian guy orders a sake, and the Hispanic guy orders a shot of tequila. They were drinking and having a great time.

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What happens when the hydro goes out for 1 second? 1 minute? 1 hour? 1 day? 1 month? 1 year? -1.8 people die. 105 people die. 6,306 people die. 151,338 people die. 4,603,198 people die. 55,238,376 people die. Aw shit, then you have to take account for how many people die of starvation :\, and the ones who froze to death, and the ones who died from heat stroke, And the ones who died of Alzheimers.

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what do you call a white man who appears to be standing on water? a surfer

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Q: Why were there four married men in one room without their pants on? A: because it was the mens bathroom.

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Drew Knowles is gay

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Why did you cross the road. You didn't your looking at this joke

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Who is stupid and no one likes him. Me. :(

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'Doctor, doctor, I think I'm a pair of curtains' Doctor prescribes antipsychotics.

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What's the difference between a black person and cancer? If you don't know already, you should really question your countries education system and your parents upbringing.

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flashback 2010 bears vs. packers vs. bears- why did'nt the packers want to go to soldier field? because they didnt want to pass another 6 flags!

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A man walks off a bus. How did he get on top of it in the first place?

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why was 6 afraid of 9? because 7 ate 9 and 6 is afraid of ghosts

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your a vagina says you, your a booby

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what do all elephants have in common? they are all monkeys

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Why dont you greet your friend Jack on a plane? because you will say "hi Jack"

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

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Ubisoft 'Very Impressed' By Pokemon Go, Working on AR game of their own.

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when life givs you lemons you say no thank you i dont take food from strangers

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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roses are red, violets are red, ive been shot in the eye with a pelet gun, please ,please help

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops