Knock knock! Who's there? F*ck. F*ck who? F*ck you.

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What's Brown and Sticky? A Stick

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roses are red violets are blue i have shit in my mouth so screw you

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Potassium? K.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

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A jewish man walks into a bar, has a drink, and goes home to his wife.

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Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

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Don't wake me up. If you wake me up then I will give you a puppy. Just wait until you fall in love with the puppy, because then i will kill it in front of you.

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Why did the gay guy walk into a straight bar To find the better looking guys

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What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

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“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

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jeanna:fu** jack:did u just say fu** jeanna:jew? jack:fu** u jew

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for his birthday? A bike

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when life givs you lemons you say no thank you i dont take food from strangers

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What's scarier than a ghost? Practically anything as ghosts aren't real.

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What do you say when your hot chocolate is to hot? This hot chocolate is too hot.

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what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? He was dead.

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty eight year olds? They've reached sexual peak but aren't yet past it. Plus, they still aren't in their 30's.

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My friends a Jehovahs Witness. He got all pissed at me because he tried to tell me a knock knock joke and I ignored him.......i totally stole this joke lol.

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Q: What kind of file do you need to turn a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole? A: A pedophile.

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A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

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what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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