Ask me if I'm a human. Are you a human? Yes.

Why was six afraid of seven You would be scared to if your name was six and you knew someone named seven

Q. What goes 100 mph and is green? A. A frog in a blender

How many cows does it take to screw in a light bulb? Either one super cow or none because cows don't even have apposable thumbs

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

Your mom is so fat her daily calorie intake is dangerously above the recommended 2000 per day.

a potato a chicken and a rooster ate a cat and you just wasted your time

what do you call an anoying ginger? jimmy overby

How come the kid couldn't go to college Because he was black and couldn't afford it

what did the teacher say to the students when she was talking about the solar system The sun is very hot. At the core it is 15 million degrees Celsius or 27 million degrees Farenheit. Using a magnifying glass, we can see the very hot heat and the light of the sun. Please do not do that because it can hurt your eyes. This makes the light very bright and the heat is so hot it could start a fire.

Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

Why do all asians all look alike? Because they do.

What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

what has wheels and runs on gas? a car with feet

Hi welcome to yack in da box, can i hell you? Yes, could i have a jumbo jack? Jew wanna yumbo yack? Yes.

Q: Why didn't the bunny eat the carrot? A: The bunny didn't have any carrots. Poor bunny.

Why was the mohel touching the little boy's penis? Because that's his job!

How do you get a clown off a swing? Get a giant scorpion to rape him.

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what's black and white and red all over? nothing... it's red

What do you call a Jew with 20 Pounds of Pennies? A rich man

What is worse than throwing your baby in the river? Letting Moses out of Egypt

What do you call an armless, legless man hanging on a wall? Art.

Why was the giant centipede full? Because it just ate half a dozen purebred golden retriever puppies by hiding all day in the poopy newspapers and emerging at night to eat the defenseless baby dogs in their sleep. BUM BUM BUM KSSSH!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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