Have you heard the one of the two headed man an the horse? Neither have I

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Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

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What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

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What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

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people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

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A blonde was taking a Math exam, so she brought her Asian boyfriend with her. It turns out they were going to his father's retirement party afterwards.

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What's worse then failing a math test? Your mom getting shot

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh..wait...that's actually an anti-joke already...

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What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

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Your mom is so fat she probably has a body mass index of between 25 and 30 which is considered to be "overweight" but paradoxically is associated with fewer health risks by medical professionals.

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If life throws you lemons, you might be dislexic

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What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

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What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

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What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? They both can't ride a bike

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Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

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Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

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There was a boy named Johnson. He was a happy boy who had a mother and father who loved. One day he didn't do his homework

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wanna hear a clean joke? bob took a bath with bubbles. wanna hear a dirty joke? bubbles was a man :) i heard this somewhere and it made me laugh :)

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What's worse then ten dead babies in a barrel? The one at the bottom is still alive.

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A man in a state penitentiary drops his soap. He then picks it up and continues his shower.

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how do you make holy water? you burn the hell out of it

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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mary had a little lamb its fleece was white as snow and everywhere that mary went this joke has no punchline

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A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "You know, you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate says, "I know, I was just raped by a group of men who thought it would be funny to humiliate me as much as possible. The bartender then called 911 seeing that a horrible crime had just been committed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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