Why was the girl's clitoris cut off? Her country practiced Sharia Law.

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Friends are just like trees. They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Whats funny about a guinea pig water skiing? The part where he explodes.

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roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme others don't.

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I run, but I have no legs. I see, but I have no eyes. What am I? A prospective result of future medical advancements that allow the disabled to live normal, healthy and fulfilling lives.

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What do you call it when you have sex with a black man? Sex

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What is black, can fly and sing? R. Kelly.. "I believe I can fly"

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WHAT DO U CALL GINGERS GABRIELLA

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There's this Priest, a Rabbi and a Preacher talking about how similar they are.

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among liedbtt is my Captcha code

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What do Kurt Cobain and a whale have in common? Both have holes in the back of their heads

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A blonde woman, a brunette woman and a redhaired woman walk into a bar. They can be considered fiscally responsible because it was two for one Ladie's Night.

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Two attractive women were getting ready to visit the gym. On the way there, they stopped at a local sports store to purchase some new shorts, and they got it at a good discount price

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Answer: because he had no guts

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A white man, hispanic man, and a black man walk into a bar together. They order cokes.

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What's black and white all over and has a mouth? A Zebra

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How many women does it take to change a lightbulb. None, Thomas Edison was a man.

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Why are women such horrible drivers? Their hair gets in the way.

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A gay man goes out with a butch lesbian and develops a loving relationship, years later they get married and have kids, adopting them from the local orphanage and lives happily ever after.

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Mommy how come daddy went to the doctors today? Well sweetie, honestly daddy wanted me to shove things up his ass And I refused to so he went to the doctors so they can do it...

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How can you tell your not italian? You aint no Guito!

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How can you treble the value of any Skoda car? Ensure its paintwork, upholstary, floor, lights, wipers, steering wheel, brake, horn, CD player, radio and clutch are clean and/or sound; fill its petrol tank, oil, brake and winscreen wiper fluid reserves; fit a roof rack; include a red triangle, a fire extinguisher, a blanket and a first aid kit in the sale; take out comprehensive insurance and pay a year's road tax and MOT before selling it.

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Little Johnny is sleeping overnight at a school camping trip. The teacher goes around to check tents to make sure everybody is falling asleep fine. Little Johnny, however, says, "Miss, I am scared of the dark. Can I sleep in your tent instead?" The teacher reluctantly agrees, finishes checking around and brings Little Johnny to her tent. "Miss, can I play with your belly button with my finger? My mommy lets me", asks little Johnny. The teacher reluctantly agrees. Suddenly, the teacher jumps up. "THAT WASN'T MY BELLY BUTTON!", she shouts. "Yeah," says Little Johnny. "Well that wasn't my finger, either."

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops