A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

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What did one pig say to the other pig while sitting in the bathtub? No thanks I already have a typewriter.

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In retrospect, I was wrong to microwave all those cats.

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-What do you call a dog with no legs? -Call it whatever you want, it's not coming!

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THAT AWKWARD MOMENT... nuff said

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A man entered ten puns into a pun contest, hoping that one of them would win. Unfortunately, he came in third place and was discouraged by his loss.

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he's working out.

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What did the little boy say when he was asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

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Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

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Wanna know my life in a nutshell? Well you can't. Life is an inanimate object an will therefore not fit inside anything, let alone a nutshell.

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What did the white man say to the black man? Did you see the game yesterday?

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what do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? run

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What's worse than getting raped? getting raped by a horse in car while listening to nickelback

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why couldn't the girl sit down? she didn't have a butt.

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What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

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NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

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once upon a time there was a cripple little girls who lived in an orfanage were she got raped then beat .

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A kid asks his mom: "Mom, what would I be when I grow up?" And so his mother answers: "You won't grow up, you have cancer"

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How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

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Your mamas so stupid, her IQ is lower than the average person of her age group.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

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Why do girls swim naked in lakes and oceans? so they have an excuse why their pussies smell like either tuna or cat fish.

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What do you call a cow who can't produce milk? Utter failure.

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Why did Maggie shit herself? Because she saw her son.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops