Why are pigs smelly ? Because a cucumber can't walk.

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Where did the paralytic go for a vacation? No where he can't move.

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Why did the white woman press charges against the black guy? Because he raped her

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What do you get when you cross a blonde with a dinosaur? Beastiality

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair... Fuzzy Wuzzy has cancer

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Why did the man with no arms fall of his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him

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What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

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How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

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What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

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Why was lady crying? Because her ten yer old son died of cancer..

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Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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Knock, Knock? Who's there? Its Gilly.

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You know what's funny? You got AIDs

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Some people are like Slinkies: they don't work as well as they say they will and you'll get bored of them quickly.

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

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A: What's that on your shoulder? B: A birthmark. A: How long have you had it? B: Don't know.

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What's the best example of an anti-joke? This one.

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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Three Jews walked into a bar. I lied... it was a gas chamber.

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I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. But it wasn't actually getting bigger, it was just getting closer. So I got hit in the face.

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Knock Knock Who's there? My foot. My foot who? My foot in your ass.

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What is grey and transparent? An elephant in a zip-lock bag.

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Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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