What do Kobe Bryant and a toaster have in common? They both rape white women. Except for the toaster.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? He said "Get in the car".

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What is the difference between Sarah Jessica Parker and a horse? Sarah Jessica Parker is a human being who is also a very skilled actress A horse is a animal which is usualy kept in a barn

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Why is six afraid of seven? SE7EN!

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I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? "Dwane!" I don't know any Dwane. Perhaps you have the wrong address. "Oh. Sorry to have bothered you!"

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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What's the worst part about eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheel chair.

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Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because the paint used on their faces makes the extra terrestrials leery of lead poisoning.

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What does the homosexual arab who plays football who has a best friend called Dave enjoy doing? Playing football.

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Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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What did one lawyer say to the other? Hello

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roses are red violets are blue i'm a schizophrenic and so am i

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What's better than your first Hanukkah? Not being a Jew.

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How do you make a person cry? You bury them alive.

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When SCUBA diving, why is it important to fall backward off the side of the boat? Because if you fell forward, you would still be in the boat.

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A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

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What was little Sarah's last Words to johnny before he got hit by the bus??? Can i have your ice cream.

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If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

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Your mother is so large she finds it difficult to fit into regular sized clothing

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Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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A bar walks into Chuck Norris.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops