Your mother is so fat, that somebody should inform her of the risks of eating unhealthy foods because she could obtain life threatening diseases.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He was perfectly happy where he was.

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Hey! I just met you. And this may seem crazy. So here's my number: Now Get in the van.

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Your mom is so fat she's overweight

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what's black and white and red all over? a zebra in a blender

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How did the black guy survive from drowning? Years of Swimming lessons at his local YMCA

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Q: Did you hear about the fire at the circus? A: It was in tents!

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless your father is a doctor and you live with him.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he is quite wealthy.

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My spelling is horrible

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Because the light was green.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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What do you call a green dog? A green dog.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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your mom is so ugly that she was made fun of in highschool so much that she now has social issues and a fear of close relationships which is why she left you and your father at age 5

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Why couldn't the boy in the wheelchair sue the man making fun of him? Because he couldn't get up the stairs to court.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? "Get in the car."

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A Mexican and an African American are in a car, who is driving? The Mexican, while the African American rides in the passenger seat.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a jam sandwich

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You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

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mirror mirror on the wall who has the most desire of them all? Matt Daly!

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Chuck Norris and Bane recently had a fight on a bet. The result was Bane won easily as he is the much bigger and stronger man, and Chuck Norris lacks the skills he once possessed as a younger man as he is now 72 years old.

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what did i do after u pinched me? i killed everyone

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This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops