Id like to apologize for the one below (near the end yeah at the very end yeah that near you fuck!) When I said I give candy to etc etc I did mean I do not give candy to... Well... Nothing male, and I do not apologize, thank you. Shortie: Me as a Sociopath vs Sociopath with faster gunplay: So A Sociopath moved into my neighborhood, he arrived at my place and said hey you? You the sociopa... "BOOM" Moral: Shoot first, listen later... And if you hear something keep shooting... Anyway that was not the Sociopath but I got him eventually.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse stares eats an apple and trots out... Horses can't speak therefore do not understand the question and cannot reply

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What do u call a man who sells hot dogs on the street? A Mexican

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A ninja is walking down the street then he...finds a puppy a names him rex

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What's 8 foot tall and can't breathe? Ryan Eisenhour

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A man wakes up in his bed and looks at the clock. He realises he is gonna be late for work. He quickly gets out of bed, into the bathroom, has a shower, puts his deodorant on and brushes his teeth, gets dressed, and goes in his car. He drives out of his garage and drives to his work but gets stuck in traffic. He then gets to the car park of his work and parks his car. He gets out, goes up the elevator to his floor, when the elevator door opens to his floor, he quickly says hello to Terrance and goes to his bosses office. And guess what the boss says? You're late.

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy. But I have Alzheimer's... Hey, I just met you...

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flashback 2010 bears vs. packers vs. bears- why did'nt the packers want to go to soldier field? because they didnt want to pass another 6 flags!

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How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Impossible, non-living organisms are incapable of moving and babies lack the brain capacity to understand how to screw in a light bulb.

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Q: whats the difference between 3 asain people 3 black people and 3 mexican prople?? A: there all different nationality

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A morbidly overweight baby eats horse poop and dies a slow horrible death

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What's worse than finding 16 dead babies in a tree? Finding 1 dead baby in 16 trees.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says: "I forgot to store nuts for winter, now i am dead."

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Q: How many Jews can u fit in a bathtub? A: Well it depends if you use their ashes.

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Q: Why were there four married men in one room without their pants on? A: because it was the mens bathroom.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

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What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

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An Asian man walked to P.F. Changs, and asked where the bathroom is.

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What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

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why did the boy fall over? because he was hit by a fridge that fell out of the tree.

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What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

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Roses are blu Violets are red Im colored blind

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What is the hottest day of the week? Wednesday

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Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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