roses are red violets are blue they really are

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Hey! I just met you. And this may seem crazy. So here's my number: Now Get in the van.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A muslim man takes a flight to New York. He lands safely at JFK airport.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red, The grass is greener, Every time i'm with you, I touch my wiener.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A hooded black man walks into a Convenience store. He orders a cup of hot chocolate as it is very cold outside.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple?  Getting raped by a 10 foot scorpion.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the fork say to the spoon? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you make a professional wrestler cry? You don't

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do mermaids wear? Nothing. Mermaids don't exist

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse than discovering a hornet's nest next to your house? Being raped.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a chicken with three eyes? One that flew over the cuckoo's nest.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q. How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A. Who knows? It's dark!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you make a clown sad? You kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A man was caught cross dressing by his wife. She divorced him.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you piss off a blind person? Tell him to piss in a round room.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

The holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Jehovah's Witness. Have you heard the word of God?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A Jewish man walks into an ice-cream shop. Using the money he ha eared from his full time job, he orders a chocolate ice-cream in a waffle cone.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why did the little girl fell off the bed? because she saw his father rape her sister after killing his mother years ago, and every time she goes to sleep, she remembers that and the images come back to haunt her

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

If you have 12 apples and I have 12 ice cubes how many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops