What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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why are black people always so funny because they think of funny jokes

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Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? It had no legs.

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What do you say to a homeless man sat in a train station? That there is a homeless shelter around the corner.

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Whats better than giving birth to a disabled son? A Blowjob

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Roses are red violets are blue I don't know you so get away from me.

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Twelve people are in a plane. One of them says: "Man, we really are not so many in this plane" Another one replies: "It's because it's a 12 seats plane." Another says: "Do 12 seats planes even exist?" Another one answers: "Of course they do." Another person says: "Guys, are we even flying?" Someone says: "I don't know" Another says: "Yes, we're flying, look out the window." Another says: "I have cancer." Someone reacts: "Oh, I'm really sorry for you" Another: "Yes, me too" Someone adds: "It's really terrible" Another says: "Has science made any progress recently?" The plane crashes.

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What is the difference between a car accident and being on your period? A period is less bloody.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

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What happens when you drop a glass of milk? It hits the ground and breaks, depending on what material the glass is made of, acrylic glass or plastic, and the softness of the floor you drop it on,

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What do Michael Jackson and most Catholic priests have in common? They're dead.

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Why couldn't the blond get into the library? Because the library was closed therefore the door was locked.

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What did the lady say after she returned home from the grocery store? "Oh no! I forgot the milk!"

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Why did the asian driver crash his car? Because he was driving while intoxicated.

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three mexicans walk into a bar... the bartender says get the fuck out!

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How can you get a handicap black man to walk again? You don't...... Unless you motivate him with fried chicken. Anti-anti-joke!

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What's got two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

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What do you call a joke that isnt funny? This one.

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What's worse than eating half a worm? Eating somebody's brain.

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How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Your face Godammit!!!

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What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

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Smoke Day, Every Weed.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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