Why didn't gram-pa give his grandson a Birthday present? Because he had Alzheimer's and forgot about him.

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Wgat did the umpire say to the asian batter? Foul ricebowl!

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What do you say if you wake up and see your television floating around at night? Say,"I should probably get to sleep. This is probably an effect of sleep deprivation."

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What do you call a black man on the moon An astronaut

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cory is gay

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Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama all found a magical lamp. The Genie appeared and said, "I will grant one wish for all of you, and one wish only." Bill wished to become president. The other two thought that would be pretty cool and did the same. (ic3)

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there is a fat ass bitch who lives in littlefield TX, her name...Krista. her facebook.... NannyGrizzly. I hate her!!! with a pasion... she was my neighbor... i can hear her yelling all the time. Please... someone give her a reason to yell. .................Facebook..........Nannygrizzly.......do....something.....about.......her.... thank you. Ima TROLE!!!!! hahahahaahhhahahahahahahaahha. damn it. (: v P PS. she is a bitch

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there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

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Which is funnier: a sack of coal or a sack of old clothes? Neither is particularly funny.

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Whats the worst thing your parents could ever do to a teenager? Take there phone.

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Yo mama so fat! She should be concerned because diabetes is a serious problem that can lead to a heart attack. Also STOP EATING MCDONALDS.

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What did rangler get on anti joke? Thumbs down.

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Your mom is so nce that when you got into college she taught you to be more independent so you could succeed later in life.

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Man: Knock knock Man 2: who's there Alzheimer's patient: to get to the other side!

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Why am i so sexy? Because a dog raised me.

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In 1284, while the town of Hamelin was suffering from a rat infestation, a man dressed in pied clothing appeared, claiming to be a rat-catcher. He loyally promised the townsmen a solution for their problem with the rats. The townsmen in appreciation and glad to get rid of the infestation promised to pay him for the removal of the rats, they were looking forward to being left in peace. The man pleased with their decision accepted, and played a mystical musical pipe to lure the rats with a joyous song into the Weser River, where all but one drowned. Despite his renowned success, the people reneged on their promise and refused to pay the rat-catcher the full amount of money. The man left the town angry and upset the people had betrayed his kindness, he did however vow to return some time later, seeking revenge. On Saint John and Paul's day while the inhabitants were happily sat in church, he played his pipe yet again, dressed in green, like a hunter, this time attracting the young and joyful children of Hamelin. One hundred and thirty boys and girls followed him out of the town, skipping in song as they went, where they were lured into a cave. The events that followed are now known as the 1284 mass child massacrer, in which all 130 children were raped and savagely tortured and killed one by one, each viscously taped and recorded for the pipe pipers satisfaction, where a copy of each tape was sent to their corresponding parents, this was before their bodies turned up dangling from a tree and the bottom of the village, all 130 of them unrecognisable from decomposition and mutilation the pipe piper had inflicted.

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There is a tree. its still there. your still reading this, i dont know why, ok im getting sick of writing something that isnt even funny

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Whats black and gay? Obama

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A dog walks up to a puddle of pee and he starts to smell it

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Why does Garrett have a small penis? He is not old enough to buy extenze.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? A comment saying "I don't think that's an anti-joke"

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Humans are pathetic: What kind of heaven is it when you die, and learn that everybody you love chose the wrong religion and is burning in hell? Moral: Human garbage!

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What do you call 2 lesbians in a canoe? Fur traders

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what do you call a black guy with a nice car? most probably a rapper or professional athlete, however there is also a great chance that he is a doctor of philosophy and well educated.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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