What's funnier than 100 dead babies? Everything.

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Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

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In Soviet Russia, blonde is smart

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What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

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Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

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Theres a blonde and a brunette at a party. The redhead is left out because she has no soul.

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knock knock WHO'S THERE?! ARE YOU A SEX CRIMINAL?! NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT TO YOU MUM!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Scientists are still unable to fully understand the brain functioning of chickens enough to comprehend their motives for doing such a thing.

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What is blue and has blue shoes? A blue shoe box

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Why did the sailor fall off the boat? Because vampires arent real.

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Why Was the straight man in love ? because he was an intelligent human being who had the formula of understanding woman .

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That was totally mean! I mean I was in no way going to say any of that to you! Especially not the last part, sorry that must have been part of the suggestion or something, I barely ever tell myself stuff like that, I mean stop it okay? I mean I totally read it and all but I was all like "I am notnot typing that" please stop it, its humiliating.

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What did Stevie Wonders wife do when they got into fights? Re-Arrange the furniture

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What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

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why was the boy mad? He had a lot of homework that evening

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Matters the size of the bathtub and the size of the babies.

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A: Knock Knock (waits for an answer) oh there's no one in.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? like most animals that wander onto the road, it was completely unaware that the road can be very dangerous. It didn't go onto the road on purpose, it simply treated the road as if it was just like the rest of the ground.

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Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

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What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? Boyscouts came back from camp

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Llega San Pedro le dice a dios y se va.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops