What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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An obese man walked into McDonalds and ordered 6 Big Macs. He proceeded to walk to a booth in the back corner and eat them all. Turns out he was white.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

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What do you call a red ballon? It depends on its color duh!

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Why did the balck man sit at the back of the bus? Because all the other seats were taken.

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How do you eat an Elephant? Elephant meat is most palatable after roasting in a 450 degree oven for 2 hours. Garnish with carrots and broccoli.

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Equal rights!

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Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? He's dead.

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How do you get a one-armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

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Why did the girl make a sandwich for her boyfriend? Because she offered to make lunch in order to save money by not going to a restaurant.

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What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

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I've got some good news an some bad news. The good new is that you just won 10 million dollars! The bad news is I'm just kidding.

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what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a school bus and died.

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what is green and has weels? grass i was kidding about the weels.

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Jacob Mckeand licks his gooch everynight. Some nights he even covers it in maple syrup. 'mmmmm' he thinks to himself as he licks his 7 inch gooch up and down.

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Why was Joe afraid of Steve? Because Steve raped and killed all of Joe's three children two weeks ago.

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-Knock knok who's there? -Orange Orange who? -Orange you glad im an orange? ...I believe you have confused the noun "Orange" with the conjunction "aren't".

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What's worse than hitting your funny bone on a chair............... Hearing one person say "its friday" then realizing that you are now singing

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How can you get a hot girl to notice you? Set her baby on fire.

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Q: How pregnancy test is performed in Somalia?! A: Shove a piece of bread between the legs of the women and if the bread is bitten when you take it out, she is pregnant!

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why did the chicken cross the road? He saw his family getting murdered and tried to stop it but got hit in the process

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when nothing goes right go left because if you go straight you will fall off the cliff

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What does a sock, pillow and a lamp have in common? -they all live underwater expect for the sock, pillow and lamp -Matt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops