what cuts the grass on christmas eve and lives in mexico? JP I lied about Mexico jackin it in san diego

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I'm pretty sure you can't throw a fridge...

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? You apparently are not a fan of lemons what so ever, so you then throw them away, not knowing what to expect.

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A black man and a white man walk into a job interview. Neither of them get the job due to lack of skill in the field.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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What do you get when you mix a turtle and a dog An animal

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what does the doctor do when he tells you you have aids? he laughs and says "hahahahahhaha sucks for you, i dont!"

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NO I AM NEROCHAN LEFT!

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yo mama so dumb... because she was not properly educated

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Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

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What do you call someone who thinks they're funny but in reality isn't? Adam chapali Knock knock Who's there? NOT adam chapali

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Roses are red and so is venus now kneel down and suck my penis:)

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Q Why did the feminist cross the road? A To suck my dick

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If I could rearrange the letters of the alphabet.... dklaujeo bnvalue doiandkluq!!

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what do you call a mexican with a rubber blanket cold

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How Many Chickens does it take to make an egg? NOrmally 2

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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Knock knock. Whose there? No one, I'm trying to tell a knock knock joke.

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What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

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What's the best part of the 1980s? They're over.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She is a woman ... Who is blind, deaf and mute Therefore considered a danger to herself And those around her.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

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Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was in the oven because the farmer was cooking it for dinner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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