Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

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How did the clown get the baby to stop crying? He hit it with an axe.

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Jack Stevens

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1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

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What's the cure of cancer? Death.

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Your mum is so fat that she finds trouble fitting through thinner doorways

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

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What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

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can people thumb up the evil dead statment below please... its important to me. (and the cup joke below) thanks people , ur great.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? I dont know lets go play on our bikes.

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Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

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Why did the boy cry after baseball practice? He was molested by his coach.

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What did the doctor say to the man on the nice day? You have cancer. How nice the day was is irrelevant

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What did the lactose intolerant boy say when he accidentally drank some milk? Nothing, he went into anaphylactic shock and couldn't breathe.

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero? Because it is impossible, the answer is undefined.

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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Where do you8 find a dog with no legs? right where you left it

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Why did Justin Bieber cross the road? Because the chicken chose him as a decoy.

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This is an anti-joke. It is not funny because "anti" means the opposite of something.

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"hey bro" "WHATS UP" "nothin..... I heard you had your first bj yesterday." "YEAH!!" "how'd it taste?" ........

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What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

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What's white and looks like paper? Paper

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why did your mom leave your dad because he was a drunk :l

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A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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