Me: Ask me if I'm an orange. You: Are you an orange? Me: No

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What did the convicted pedophile do to the ten year old boy? He molested him.

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What do you call potato salad in Iceland? Edible. The fact that it happens to be in Iceland doesn't make a difference

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what did the monitor say to the boy? Im a Monitor

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How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

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Yo mumma so poor that she dosent have any money

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The blonde, brunette and,the red headed girls were at a store. When the blonde says......... im tired let's leave.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? "Get in the car Robin."

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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Whats green, furry and it stole christmas? A Robber with a Christmas tree on his back

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knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

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Who looks like Bill Cosby, Smells like Bill Cosby, But isn't Bill Cosby? An imposter who should be sent to jail.

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What is said about the man who is addicted to online gaming? He plays more than 5 hours per day and doesn't have any social contacts or whatsoever.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

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Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? No, we can't.

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If I was a backstabber, you would have been dead already, without me having anything to do with it in the first place, listen, we cannot change the world, those that control the media, control the world. And our role was the opposite, we wanted people to find their individual selves and put their talents for use for themselves and us, today the media tells people who they are, what they like, and what to eat and wear. None of us can do this, point zero is gone, its simply a matter of time, but if you want to try, I can do what I can, in hopes of delaying the inevitable.

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Whats the differnce betwwen a Wheelbarrow and a sack of dead babies The wheelbarrow is not in my garage

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the farmer let him out, and he found a road to cross!

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What's the most confusing day in Mexico? Father's Day.

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how do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family

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why did the boy call the girl a bitch? Because she was beautiful.

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A teenage girl walks into a bar. She sits down and watches the TV up against the wall. The bartender walks by and says "Hello, do you have I.D." The girl says "No, I'm just here waiting for my ride." The bartender then says "Well I'm sorry to have to tell you this but you gotta be 21 or over to sit in the bar." The girl says "Okay, but is there anywhere I can wait that is safe?" The bartender asks "Why?" and the girl replies "Well, I've been hiding from my ex boyfriend. I just broke up with him an hour ago. He was very controlling and he is still not over me. So now I'm here waiting for my new boyfriend." The bartender says "What you have a new boyfriend already? Maybe that's why your ex was angry." The girl says "yeah, I know, oh look there's my ride. It was nice talking with you, have a good night."

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A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

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What's the difference between a chicken and a 3 legged dog? There are numerous differences. I will not however go into the biological explanations of these differences.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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