knock knock who's there ?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

whos on the right track? lady gaga

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Did you here about the guy who kidnapped Liam Neeson's daughter? Well, he died

thumb_up thumb_down -9

how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

One day a baby hit himself on the head with a stuffed animal. I lied, it was a brick, so he died.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Your face Godammit!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the kid fall? He got pushed off of a building

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what did the black guy get from churches chicken? fried chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the black man say to the white man? Hey, I like your shirt.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q. How do you kill 5000 flies? A. Slap a afraican in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How did the black guy survive the bus crash? At the time of the bus crash, it was a segregated community, therefore no black people were allowed on buses.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

knock knock who's there your moms dead im sorry

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Two lions are walking down the street. One lion says to the other, "where is everybody?"

thumb_up thumb_down -11

-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

roses are read, violets are blue. i have alzheimers and Jill came tumbling down.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

roses are red grass is greener get in the bed and suck on my wiener

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It's an obscure number you've probably never heard of.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

why did suzie fall off the swing? because shes autistic and her mother likes to abuse her.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops