Christ is a conspiracy

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A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

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Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from ebola

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

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What do you call 5 black people being killed in a car crash? A terrible incident

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What do you call a mexican with a driveable lawnmower? Rather wealthy.. He must have a secure job to pay for a home with a lawn, and a lawnmower.

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there once was a man named china who got stuck in yo mamas vagina he escaped through her butthole minus her butt mole and then died a horrible and painful death

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Q: What's blue and yellow all over? A: A baby at the bottom of the pool with a slashed floatie. Q: What's red and yellow all over? A: A floatie at the top of a pool with a slashed baby.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

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Why do Asians get 50% off on movies? They don't.

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pobody's nerfect

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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Why did the man soil himself at his daughters wedding? Because he has an enlarged prostate and has trouble sitting down for long periods of time.

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

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What fires shots? A gun

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How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

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A guy punched himself. He then said ouch.

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knock knock who's there? the paperboy the paperboy who? i lied, i'm a serial rapist, you should have looked through the peephole

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'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

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Why did the man cross the road? Because he couldn't get his dick out of the chicken

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What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

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What happened to Grant when he did a cart wheel? Chuck had sex with Victoria

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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