Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. A.Knock knock B. Who's there? A.Not Susie

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What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheelchair

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Why didn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell off a cliff? She was wearing Mittens

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How do you confuse your algebra teacher? Tell her to prove that she exists.

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What is brown and sticky? Maple Syrup.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the kangaroo die? Because two stapled koalas fell on its head.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a bus.

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What's orange and fluffy? Orange Fluff

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Sorry, I need to take care of business up here, it is for the best that we do not communicate for a while, suspicions are going to be flaring up all over the place You better keep your head low, the place with the code-name "The Kings Throne" was under attack, but as you might know, its not what it used to be, you should all leave Point Zero in 3-4 hours when the dust has settled. Personally I suspect it is someone from the past, yes rivals, but according to the information nobody that knows who "The Nero" is, so as you can already tell, you and I are in equal danger until this is resolved. I promise to call you someday

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Why did the man punch NUGE in the face? Because he got angry that NUGE was being such a BA person and he was jealous of NUGE'S style and he just got dumped by his ugly as poop mom which was eating Anti Chicken.

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Where did Sally go when the bomb went off? Everywhere.

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Did you know that Claire Seiter likes to drinkapplseiter? No. Oh well she does..

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Why did the scientist go to the hospital? because he was experimenting with dangerous chemicals, and they exploded in his unsuspecting face. He doesn't have skin now.

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What do pebbles and Batman have in common. They're both pebbles. Except Batman.

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How did Sarah Palin see Russia from her house? She didn't.

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Knock Knock! Whos There? Little boy blew! Little boy blew who? Micheal Jackson....

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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Bill Gates, Jeff Bezos and Elon Musk die and find themselves standing before St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. Actually, that's just speculation. No one really knows what happens when you die. Most likely your consciousness simply stops, and you cease to exist, an eternity of oblivion. But most people can't face this possibility so we have made up comforting stories to attempt to ease our collective fear of death.

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A man commands his dog to sit. However, his dog is poorly trained, so does not.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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When did the ball-room finally close? Closing time.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

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Once upon a time a was born

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops