What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It thought they were playing follow the leader. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the little girl fall off her tricycle? She was hit by three monkeys and a refrigerator.

how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

Why did the turtle take so long on his run? Because he never went on a run he walked.

Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

Hey I just met you. And this is crazy. So get in my van. Cause I have candy.

What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

hi little boy you want some candy i dont know do you want some candy you creeper

What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

Your momma is so black that she probably has ancestors indigenous to Africa.

Q: What's worse than not having a good relationship? A: Starving Africans

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Why did the really unfunny man buy AntiJoke The Book??? It was a good deal and only $9.99.

What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

What do you get when you mix monster, coke, and and seltzer? Kicked out of stop and shop.

Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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