What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

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Q: What's worse than biting into and apple and finding a worm? A: being severely malnourished, thus physically inept to do most simple tasks

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whats orange and cant talk? an orange

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Whats worse than a truck full of dead babies? A live baby trying to eat his way out.

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How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

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What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

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What's more exiting than watching football Escaping through the underground railroad

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What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

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How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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Chris: Hey, want to hear a sad joke? Joe: No, those are mean and offensive.

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What did the politician say to the other politician? We are both politicians.

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Day turn night. Dreaming is now true . Turn on your flashlight, slenderman is behind you.

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How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

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How does a black guy in debt make money fast at the bank? He applies for a loan and conscientiously works hard to pay off the loan in turn, which he was lucky enough to get at a low interest rate.

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a man walks into a bar. it was a metal bar. his balls hurt.

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because black people are usually stronger than chicken. If they weren't, chickens would probably eat fried black people.

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What's worse than one cat stuck in a tree? Getting raped

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah's witness.

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3 men walk into a bar, and the fourth guy behind them had the sense to duck under it.

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A. why'd the chicken cross the road? B.a dog got hit by a bus.

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Why was the Irish Cop happy to see the Mexican family killed in a accident? Because the Lopez family were a family known for generosity and selflessness. It came as no surprise to anyone who knew Steven Lopez and his beloved family that they were all organ donors and not only that but Shelly Lopez, Steven's oldest daughter had blood type O negative (the universal donor). Officer McO'Brianiganly's wife is dying in the hospital in need of a kidney transplant, doctors have given her just weeks to live. Now, thanks to unfortunate events for la familia Lopez., Officer McO'Brianiganly and his wife can live a long happy life together, just as they always imagined.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops