Jesus, Mohammed, and Moses all walk into a bar. They sit down at a table and glare at each other before turning to watch the baseball game. They support opposing teams.

the firefighter says to the other firefighter: hey firefighter, are we going to fight a fire?

How can you make sure your friend wont die of cancer? Decapitate him

How do you torture Helen Keller? You put her on a table and slowly pull her limbs off

Why did the chicken cross the road? Systemic oppression.

And riiight after you... Hey its always ladies first.

Q. Why do cheetahs run so fast? A. Because their bodies allow them to.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was tired of hearing that joke

Did you hear about the man who lost his right arm and left leg... He's ok now he's all right.

Maths.

Its Eliza, hope you are still there, would you mind getting here sooner? This site is not safe, besides its cold here, I mean send somebody else if you got to, I might look frail but Nero taught me a thing or two, so I can honestly say that Nero taught me better than you guys just in case. Funny you say there is no code, yet add three, yeah you better expect nothing "fancy", Mr.Torture dungeon master. Honestly though I do not blame you, and if I really meant you where a psycho, I would not have agreed/asked you showed up, I am serious I need to get out of here.

And now a word from our sponsors

What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Lets go get some tacos.

Why can't white kids say the "F" word? Because they'll get soap in their mouths Why can't black kids say the "F" word? Because they'll get a beating until their butts turn black and blue and they'll start crying in pain

what happened to the boy who got hit by a truck he went to the hospitel

A man walks into a bar. He realizes that he would need a designated driver if he would want to return home safely. So he then leaves.

Q:How do you confuse a blonde preschooler? A:Calculus.

how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

What's worse than the Holocaust? A worm in your apple.

What do you get when you cross a road with a car? Severe injuries or even death.

What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

Why was Jesus Christ white? Because it would be a lot better if I had more confidence in myself...

What do you call Bob if he gets a nose ring? Bob

Why did the baby cross the road? Becuz it was stapled to the chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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