What did the old Hispanic man say to the young black woman in the Laundromat? I don't know cause I goofed in school and didn't pay attention in spanish class.

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What did one cat say to the other cat? Nothing.

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What did Ben's Graandma get him for Christmas? Nothing, she died on Thanksgiving!

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teacher: what is your name? student: some people call me attractive (mx)

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

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Roses are blu Violets are red Im colored blind

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Q. What do you call Lebron James on a roller Coster? A. A man who makes a lot of money and decided to take his family out on a family fun day to an amusement park.

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Why is it bad luck for a black cat to cross your path? I'll tell you in Heaven

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What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

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"Mommy! Look, I found a turtle!" "that's no turtle." "Oh..."

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Fact: Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people one will always disagree with the other nine.

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A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

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My name is Corey, and I am Dickbang Majestic. Q: Who is Dickbang Majestic? A: Corey is.

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what can keep u alive for many years- -not being shot

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Why didn't Superman save the people from 9/11? Because he was a quadriplegic.

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on a scale from voldemort to nigel thornberry, how big is your penis?

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What do you get when you cross a dog with an anteater? An animal unlikely to survive beyond infancy.

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Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

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Jerry: Why arent you talking to me Seth? Seth then explains using sign language that he was born mute and is offended that Jerry keeps forgetting. Then Jerry uses sign language to say" **** off i have alzheimers!"

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What worse than a baby nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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An albino and a jew walk in to a bar. They both order the same drink and chat for a few minutes before the albino must get home to his wife. The jew leaves shortly after, tipping the bar tender a generous amount for his superb service.

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Why did the blonde woman decide to get plastic surgery? Because she was self-conscious and unhappy with the way she looked.

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What's worst then finding an worm in your apple. Finding a colony of flesh eating bugs after you toke a bite.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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