A Chinese man, a Mexican man, and an American man are all on a plane in-flight when the pilot screams over the intercom, "We are two pounds over weight! The plane is going down unless you all throw off useless things that have no value in your countries!" The Chinese man throws out a pair of chopsticks and an egg roll and says, "I have too many of those in my country." The Mexican does the same with a taco and sombrero, repeating, "I have too many of those in my country." The American looks around his items pondering what things are too common in the USA. He locks his eyes on the Mexican. The other passengers are shocked as the American throws off a hamburger and a football.

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chuck norris won the world series of poker using his superior knowledge of counting cards and calculating probability.

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Two construction workers are working on the final floor of what will soon be the worlds tallest building. The first turns to the other and says: "Hey tom can you throw me a three quarters hex wrench? i think my set is metric." the second guy turns around and says: "yea, here you go."

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Man: Would you like to see someone Man 2: Sure Man: How bout the inside of an ambulance

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How do you make a hobo cry? You steal his trash.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown I should probably water My garden soon.

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A man stops another man on the street in Manhattan and asks "How do I get to Carnegie Hall ?" The other man gives him direction, including which subway stop to get off at.

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Q: what happens if a black guy says hi person? A: he says hi person

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What did the dog say to his owner? Bark.

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a very large and muscly guy walks into a bar and finds a scrawny white guy he asks him if he has ever been in a fight with someone bigger then him the man says no the large man then leaves the bar and they both continue on with their day

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A man walks out of a bar. Gets in his car and crashes because drunk driving isn't safe.

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If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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Q: There's a Brit, Kenyan, German, and Colombian in one room. Where are they? A: Public School

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what are you mike bibby?

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What's the difference between an orange? Two typewriters, because vests don't have sleeves.

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your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

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What do you call a purple apple? Bruised.

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What's the difference between an apple and a baby. An apple is a fruit. A baby is a human being.

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Your mom is so fat because she eats too much and is most likely incapable of controlling when to stop.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're a whore

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A gay man named pat played on a gay website with a child named Charlie

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(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

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In Soviet Russia a lot of people were killed for voicing their opinion against Stalin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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