How do you take money from a Mexican? You don't because they have none.

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If rocks were people, what would you call a bunch of marble rolling down a hill? Rocks don't have the ability to be people.

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Two chemist walk into a bar. The Bartender ask them what they want. The first chemist says he wants H20. The second chemist laughs and says he wants H20 too. Then he dies.

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my egg roll

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How do you paint a wall red? Throw a baby at it.

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hey! have you seen that clown at Walmart that hides from gay people?

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Roses are red, but there are also pink, white and yellow varieties Violets aren't blue, they're violet, hence the name I've got OCD And my poetry skills are also lacking.

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What's Rupert bear's middle name? the

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What's brown and smells like poo? Poo.

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You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

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What do you call a black man with no job? Unemployed

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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I had friends on the Death Star.

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Q:Whats big, red and eats rocks? A: A big red rock eater

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What did the boy with cancer get for his birthday? Roses on his tombstone.

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What is worse than stubbing your toe. Being shot

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Why can't Dave drive? Because Dave is an orange.

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Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

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whats the difference between a thousand dead babies and a porshe? i dont have a porshe in my garage

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How does a black man get to his parent's house on Christmas? He drives

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A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

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why was 6 afraid of 9? because 7 ate 9 and 6 is afraid of ghosts

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A black man walks into a bar and he orders a margarita. The bartender says that the margaritas are exceptionally delicious in this bar. He was right.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i know where you live now I'm coming for you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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