How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

What did Steve Hagen say to Steve Walters? "We have the same first name."

Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was shot in the head. Plus the fact that it was his first attempt on a bike made it highly unlikely to succeed anyway.

knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

My title of old was Satan. You humans killed my brother, ending God the holy trinity`s stay on earth, the Gods Omega. Moral: And yet you call ME? THE ANTICHRIST?!? I OFFERED HIM WATER! YOU OFFERED HIM TORTURE AND DEATH!

Why couldn't the blind man see his friend? He was behind him.

When an anvil and a feather are dropped off a building the anvil will hit the ground first because it's heavy

What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

Roses are red, Violets are red, Grass is red, HOLY SHIT THE GARDEN'S ON FIRE

Why did the woman cross the road? Better yet, why is she out of the kitchen

Why did the Salesman leave the leper colony? He had to wish his daughter a happy birthday.

1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's There? *runs*

A Jew ran into a wall with a boner. He broke his nose first.

Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. sama bin laden, is coming for you.

What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan? One baby in 10 trashcans.

When lives gives you lemons you might just be dyslexic, because life cannot actually give you lemons

Knock knock Who is there? Your mom Your mom who? STOP WITH THIS GAME AND JUST OPEN THE DOOR!

I am black. And i will beat your children. At checkers. They can be the red .

the economy.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted ti get to to other side. why did the medic cross the road? beacause there was a seriously injured chiken on the side of the road, it had been hit by a fat man on a jog

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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