Q. What is the worlds biggest lie A. I have read and agree to the terms of service ?

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Why was the Jewish man celebrating cinco de mayo? Because he likes other cultures and Mexican food Except pork

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Why did Johnny play piano with one hand? Because he lost his other one in a mining accident when he was 10. Johnny lives in rural Perú so he had to support his 6 younger brothers and sisters by working in a child factory.

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why couldnt hellen keller drive a car? because she was a woman

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I can still remember the last words my brother said before he kicked the bucket. "Hey you guys,how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

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What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

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And then Jesus turned the water into wine. Some did not approve of this miracle "masta, whut is da reezon you did aint make this into tha coolaid? Bible files: Directors cut.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

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Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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What is black and hangs on a rope next to a rebel flag in my back yard? A tire swing for my redneck kids to swing on.

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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

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How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

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What's worse than cancer? Nothing.

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yo mama is so fat, she's obeise

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? To get to the other side!

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What do you call a really bad band? One with a poor guitar player, a bad bass player, sloppy drums, obnoxious vocals, and all of the songs sound the same. Or Nickelback.

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Q: When do u know when your sister is on her period? A: Your dads dick tastes funny.

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When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

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Q: what is blue and has no legs A: A crippled boy painted blue

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know you have to ask the chicken if you speak chicken

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what happend when the magic man touched fire? He got burnt screamed in my ear and died.

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A mormon walks into a bar.

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Why couldn't the woman give her sister a present? Because she just got eaten by zombies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops