Did you hear the one about Steven Hawking into a bar? I havn't either, but its probably a hoot.

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What did the the man, the dog, and the psychiatrist talk about? The man's childhood experience losing his pet as a contributer to his symptoms of psychosis.

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Chuck Norris and Bane recently had a fight on a bet. The result was Bane won easily as he is the much bigger and stronger man, and Chuck Norris lacks the skills he once possessed as a younger man as he is now 72 years old.

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Why did the old man throw the clock out the window? Because he didn't want to go to a store that could repair it, so then he thought that it was better off on his yard where it could compost.

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Penis-biter

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A man walks into a store. He purchases what he was intending to, walks out, and gets on with his day.

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How do you have fun while stuck in traffic? Play bumper cars!

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Girl you must be Jamaican...because you're black and annoying.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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DAAAAAAAAMN! I AM BEHIND THE SQUARE WHEEL AGAIN! AND THAT SHIT IS POINTY! PRETENDING TO CARE IS SUCH A HASSLE! Anyway, I hope you know I was joking (otherwise you would totally be,not as smart as I thought) but yeah lets see, I am the fourth most pointless MAN, after "The square wheel", "My wife" (:)) I guess some guy just married the wrong wife huh?) And the the fucking wheel is a billion times more manly than Justin Bible or whatever you called that... Thing, and that wheel is made from a female tree! What? HAVE THE LAST COMMENT? I DO NOT GET HAVE! I GET TAKE BY FORCE! Well as far as comments and go, and sex of course.

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What do you call flashlight in an Asian kids room what ever the brand is

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh wait... I'm blind.

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whats the same about a red crayon and a blue crayon? there both the same color except for the blue one

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what do you call a gay ginger boy ? Ronan.

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Whay lawrence pearson ir r8 gay

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what happened to the girl that didn't forward the threatening chain text to ten people? nothing.

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That awkward moment when a sentence doesn't end the way you thought it gay unicorn

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Customer: Waiter, waiter, there is a fly in my soup! Waiter: Sorry madam.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What chicken? That one! Grandma, that's a hobo. Put your glasses on.

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Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

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:)Knock Knock :(Whose's there? :)None ya :(None ya who? :)None ya dam business.

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What was the women doing out of the kitchen? Watching the movie 'Birth of a Nation' at her father's house

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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