how do u get the baby to stop choking? take ur dick out of its mouth!!!

I guess calling you dear was a bit overboard for you huh? Well, just promise me you will get whatever help you need if you get ill.

Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

Why do mexicans like burritos? Because they taste good.

If you eat a brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundae, your tastebuds will likely turn purple and move to France, where people don't eat brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundaes.

whats worse than the black death. Bieber Fever

Your mamas so stupid, her IQ is lower than the average person of her age group.

why did the kid fall off his bike he had a serious illness which made it difficult for him to play sports

Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

Whats worse than 20 dead babies in a garbage can? A: The smell

A Jew and a Neo-Nazi meet in a bar. They put aside their differences and enjoy a few rounds of drinks.

What Did The Kid With No Arms And No Legs Get For His Birthday? A Walking Stick

Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

"Seriosly" You got a life buddy? Are you okay? Cant you see that I am totally rocking out on my imaginary air guitar which is now inside your mind? No you are not okay! Moral: YOU ARE NOT OKAY SPREAD THE WORD! INFORM THE WORLD! YOU ARE NOT OKAY! Moral2nd: "Seriously" though dawg, you cant keep watching over me all the time, I mean you I smell the hypocrisy, but are you guys AAAALWAYS HERE? DO NOT REPLY! WE REPEAT, DO NOT REPLY!rq

A black and a white walk into a bar, d.r. King would be proud.

Mother Mary held her daughter 20 minutes under water. Not to save her from her troubles, just to see the funny bubbles

I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

You see this dick stop being a spick now suck on my wee wee u prick

There once was a man from Nantucket... Who was fiscally responsible.

Q: Do you know what's the no.1 cause of pedophellia? A: Sexy kids

Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

An Asian walks into a bar and says, "1???????????"

Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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