Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

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what do you call a fat man standing in the middle of the street a fat man

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Man, It's so hot in here that the horses name is friday.

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Why do you never see hippopotamus hiding in trees? They are really good at it.

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what's the easiest way to tell time? a clock

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Have you ever seen a cowboy chasing boot?

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how do you make Chuck Norris laugh? tell him an anti-joke.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Im a Jew, Fart yourself.

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Roses are Roses Violets are Violets I am to Literal, That is a statement.

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What do you get if you cross a human and a cow? Arrested.

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Yo momma is so fat, that after boarding an airplane the flight crew respectfully asked her to deboard, as with her on board the plane would be exceeding the reccomended weight, and thus be unable to fly safely.

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Actually, Red Bull helps temporarily restore wakefulness when experiencing fatique or drowsiness.

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What do u call a beaner when he stands up 4 foot nothing

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What do you get if you cross a river with a cat? Wet.

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Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, And if one alcoholic should one day stroll along: There'll be no more bottles hanging on the wall.

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the awkward moment when your mom wakes you up and you realize she died six years ago

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Have ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither has she.

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Who is buried in Grant's Tomb? DeShawn

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn’t get to cross the road. Halfway through the crossing, it was hit by a car and turned into roadkill. Then a family of black people picked it up and turned it into fried chicken.

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A program that creates "pointless inventions" and posts them at the wrong sections.

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Q: What the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops