Why was the cookie sad? It had just been eaten and is currently disintegrating in the hydrochloric acid of someones stomach.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ now I know my ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ no I know my ABC etc:

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is worse then rain on your wedding day? Getting married.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why didnt the black guy die on the bus fire? The fire was in the front of the bus!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is black and hangs on a rope next to a rebel flag in my back yard? A tire swing for my redneck kids to swing on.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

whats worse than getting ran over by a car seeing your mum having sex

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What is the difference between a mallard with a cold and you? One is a sick duck I forget how this ends, but your mother is a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

100% of the people who go to school die. What about the people who don't go to school? They die too.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What is BIG, STIFF, AND FULL OF SEMEN!!!? A SUBMARINE!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What should you never give to your friends as a wedding present? An old plastic bag full of rubbish.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They scolded her and sent her to her room.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

why did the man reverse time? because his girlfriend died,also this man was super

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Artists have unique minds and can rotate shapes within their mind. I'm going to masterbate.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you call a bug stepped on 47 times, then burned to a crisp? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A rooster lays an egg on top of a henhouse. Which way does the egg fall? Roosters don't lay eggs.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Man: Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains........ Doctor: You clearly have Alarming mental issues perhaps a psychologist would be the right person to discuss this matter further

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What is stupid and looks like you? You.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops