Why were you in an igloo? I don't know, why were you?

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Q: What did the Lone Ranger say when he saw his horse coming? A: Here comes my horse.

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Why did the donkey say "Shit sorry I had no idea" Because the batteries shouted: "Nobody told me about your actions here, sorry for the terrible coding format, I am new"

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Why did the Little girl fell off the swing? A: Because she had no arms. And why did she fell again? A: Because her parents laugh about it and ride her again.

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What happen when Sarah made but her nose in other people's business? Her vagina got set on fire by cole and derrek shoved your head up his ass!

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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Q: Why didn't johnny get any Christmas presents? A: Because he died in a house fire 3 years ago.

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why did the chicken cross the road? well... to get to the other side.

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.The chicken was very distressed and trying to get away from the angry mob that followed close behind it.The chicken was never seen again. If you see a distressed chicken please contact your local police station.

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Two cows are out in a field grazing. One falls over and dies because it was unhealthy and was ravaged with a deadly disease. The other cow, which does not understand death, continues to graze until the farmer moves it back to the barn.

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Why was john's balls itchy? Because he recently gained a severe infestation of pubic lice.

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Friends are just like trees. They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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A jew walks into a bar He receives a phone call and promptly leaves

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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

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Two cows in a field. One said, "Moo!" the other said, "Shit! i was going to say that."

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The diamond one below is hilarious.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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went to mass. remembered to say with your spirit.

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The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action

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Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

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What did the pear tree say to the farmer? Go harvest that corn over yonder.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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what will you do if you become a ruler of the world? Waking up, its just a dream GET REAL!

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Your mama is so fat, we are all seriously concerned about her health.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops