Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a d!ck you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now

yada yada

How do you make an idiot in suspense?

Humans and dolphins are the only species who have sex also for enjoyment.

Why did the dog have no legs? Because its previous owner had cut them off.

When life throws you lemons, you probably have dyslexia

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana Yoshimoto. A popular Japanese author of the book, Kitchen. She is incredibly talented and it would be a great honor to have her in your house, so you should open your door.

What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The first is a person of the Jewish Faith and the other is a popular item of food.

What did the little boy want to be when he grew up? A cone

Your mom is such a big whore that she sleeps with your dad.

What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

girl. have you seen my duck man. yes he is with me right now girl rely you have him man. yes in my diner girl. d.i.c.k. man.f u

A guy walks into a bar

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chicken is a funny word, and the road is a plot device.

What did Osama Bin Laden say to his barber? ????? ??? ?????? ??? ?????, which, in their native language means, I would like to get a haircut.

Charmander is red,Squitle is blue,If you were a pokemon i'd choose you.

A man goes to his doctor and asks: ""What is wrong with me doc? One moment I think I am a teepee, the next moment I a, a wigwam." To which the doctor responds: "I have told you several times sir; you have stage IV pancreatic cancer."

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There are two kinds of people in the world: Those who can count and those who can't.

The worst part of waking up, Is no Folgers in your cup.

A dinosaur walks into the bar, everyone panics in fear and confusion because it is a dinosaur and it's weird.

it was dark outside so u know what i did....went to sleep

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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