Knock Knock! "Use the friggin' doorbell!"

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What did a husband do when he came home to find his wife murdering their children? Nothing. There is no excuse for domestic violence.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Q: What did one Christmas ornament say to the other? A: I didn't know they could talk. Get me that ornament so I can chat with him!

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How many Polacks does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to change the lightbulb, one to hold the ladder.

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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haha black people :D

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Why did the baby cross the road? Becuz it was stapled to the chicken.

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if a tree falls in A Forest, would Robert Smith hear?

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why was the mother sad? her sons school was bombed by terrorists. there we no survivors

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How do you get a bent nail out of a board? You carefully pry it out with the back of the hammer.

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what did the homeless man say to the stranger? nothing, he let he let his gun do the talking

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Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

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An alligator crawled into a bar Animal control is promptly called and he is released in a nearby lake

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What would Martin Luther King Jr. do if he was alive today? Scream at the top of his lungs as he tried to punch out the top of his coffin.

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why is the sky blue? because your mother blocked your computer to meatspin.com

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If a plane crashes on the boarder of Canada and The U.S.A- Where would they burry the survivors.

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Guys are like a sax. If no sound comes out, you're probably not blowing hard enough.

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How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

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Your family tree is like a cactus, its full of pricks. ;P

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I f*cked your mom You have aids.

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what did one dog say to his sex partner? woof woof

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what do you call a baby with a stamp on his nose.? Kentucky won the national championship this year

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops