A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

What did the cow say to the Businessman? Nothing. Cows cant talk.

whats a parkour kid? someone who jumps off things and is a pre-teen with adhd

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water, Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill came tumbling after. They both died of blood loss.

A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Doctor B: Doctor who? A: Doctor Johnson, i'm here to check up on you. How's the medication going? B: It's going well thank you, it's working. A: That's very good to hear. Hope you recover soon. B: Thank you!

What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

why did the chicken cross the road? it was suicidal.

What did the man do when he got home from work? Hit his wife.

Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

What did the black man say to the white man when the white man was drunk and naked on the roof dancing? Quit fucking around Brad and get off my roof or I'm calling the police because this is the third time this month.

what do you call an albino brown bear a polar bear

Why did the girl fall off the swingset? Because she got hit by a refridgerator.

Is your refridgerator running? good, because if it wasn't then your food would spoil.

When does a cat not land on its feet? When it has paws.

Hurr durr, I shit my pants.

I wouldn't consider the Titanic sinking to be a disaster, ????It is better down where it is wetter under the sea! ????.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall? Wally.

I have a really funny joke.

19 cats 33 hamsters 24 turtles and 23 dogs are all in a small cage, PETA is not happy.

What's red and bad for youur teeth? A brick.

tim tebow and mark sanchez will lead the jets to the superbowl

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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