Whats the difference between Qantas and Malaysia Airlines? Qantas only looses money.

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Whats green and red, in a ditch, and has cookie crumbs all over it. The girl scout i ran over with my car.

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dad said he had to drop the kids off at the pool what does that mean mom? honey it means dad has to take a shit beacuase shit looks like retarded black kids with down sydrome

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why didn't the chicken cross the road... because it got hit by a truck

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I've just bought a chainsaw, and I will now decapitate you.

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Roses are red Violets go poo My name is Dave How bout u

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Why did Jimmy's mom cry? She got stabbed in the arm and was suffering while bleeding to death.

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Q:Whats worse then hard nipples A:The holocaust

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Q: What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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Your mother is so fat that she is considered morbidly obese. In fact, she should seriously consider a weight loss diet to reduce her risk of heart disease and diabetes.

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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A black kid, a white kid, an Asian, and a Dane all take acid in a room. They have a profound experience and find a greater meaning in life.

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Guy 1: (to guy 2) Close your eyes, stand on one leg, spin around, and yell "I have never eaten a cucumber!". Guy 2: No. Guy 1: Ok.

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Two babies are playing in a sand box.. They both start crying because they get sand in their eyes

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How did the boy escape the burning building? He didn't. He burned and when to hell like everyone else.

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Q. What do you call a black pilot? A. A pilot.

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Two men walk into a bar, get drunk, and drive home. Unfortunately, they crash into a tree and are mortally wounded.

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A man walks into a bar He's an alcoholic and it's ruining his family

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Orange. Orange Who? No, this is Homeland Security. We have raised the current terrorism threat level to Orange, which means there is a high risk of terrorist attacks. Please report any suspicious behavior.

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How meny Jews can you fit in an ash-tray? None. There to big

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What did the dinosaur say to the koala? Nothing because the dinosaur is extinct and both of which cannot talk.

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That awkward moment when a loved one dies.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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Why are Pirates called Pirates? Because the word originates from the term Pirata which means 'sea attacker' in Latin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops