Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

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Man: What is the meaning of life? God: Buffalo wings. Lots and lots of buffalo wings.

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What did the Dad say when his daughter murdered everyone Tea you're grounded

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Why did the turtle fall out of the car? It forgot to buckle up

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A panhandler came up to me today and said he hadn't had a bite in weeks, so I gave him some change.

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What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

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In soviet Russia...things are different

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What's red and every where? A bloody soldier who just stepped on mine.

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Roses are red, Violets are Blue Last night was amazing, I have Aids

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Asians look like they have down syndrome.

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Did you hear the one about the deaf guy and the rhinoceros? Neither did he.

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your mum

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Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

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Why didn't Sammy Robertson make the world series catch to win the series in 1977? Because Sam, like many many discouraged teens in America, didn't follow his life long dream and later became a janitor at his hometown middle-school.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys something.

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What happened to the guy who took more lineage then he should have? He went to sleep.

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin right before they got in the b\Batmobile? A: "Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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How many omish people did it take to screw in a lightbulb.

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Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

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Boy:U a dime Girl: she said ur a quarter Boy:-_- dumb B***h

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Jesse uses a prescription shampoo called " greasey poop" because he feels like his hair doesnt look greasy enough. He cries himself asleep every night because he wants a slim body like the rest of the cool kids, so he eats his pain away, which digs him an even deeper hole. the life of Jesse zigenbein is quite tragic to say the least. Please donate 10$ to the "eat ourselves to sleep" campaign

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What has nine arms and sucks? Four children with two arms snacking on a lollipop, and one child with one arm snacking on a lollipop.

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Why was Timmy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What do you call a zebra eating Cheerios? A zebra eating Cheerios.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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