Fat people

What do you call a man who never farts in public? A private tooter!

Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. -Are u a grapefruit? NO!

what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

how do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The fridge is on its side, the door is torn off, and the ruined food scattered all over the floor. Not to mention there is an elephant in your kitchen.

roses are red, violets are blue, my son is gay, f**k my life...

How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

This Haiku is strange There is a dinosaur WOW Snuffleupagus

How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

Why was the black girl happy? She got a raise.

roses are gay s is justin beber s are u justen beber eats crap

roses are red violets are blue i like movies get me a taco

How are a chicken and a grape similar? They're both round. Except the chicken.

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

When Harry met Sally, she slapped him twice without reason, walked away and kept on with her day.

why was the little boy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

What happens when your school teacher gives you homework over the break? You give your teacher homework too!

what did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? "Grggglgluglguggarglegerrrllggglge"

Jovan

oooooooooooooo yeah write there thats the spot what i was talking about my car

Rock a by baby, In a tree top When the wind blows The cradle will rock, When the bough breaks The cradle will fall And down will come baby Dying on impact.

Why did Lindsay Lohan talk to her car? Because she's insane

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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