Knock knock. Who's there? The Postman Will you sign hear please he said Oh my toaster came

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Give one reason for not visiting a hotel. Basil Fawlty is the manager.

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Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

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What do you do when a burglar breaks into your house and tries to kill and rape you and you family? Nothing, he as an AK-47 and shoots you all dead and then has sex with your corpses.

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Yo mom is so stinky that when she gets in a room every one leaves the room

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Why do Asian men love noodles? Noodles are delicious!

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Q:what do you call someone who spends 7 hours a day playing video games? A: Someone who takes pride and joy from gaming

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A man walks into a bar. His family has died in a tragic accident and he is trying to drink down the pain.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the batmobile? 'Get in the batmobile Robin'

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How did the Mexican cross the border without getting caught? He didn't; he was executed immediately.

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wanna hear a joke? i dont like kids wanna hear a lie? im typing with two hands wanna hear a another? my hand isnt on my weiner

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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I will slam your FACE into the BOOK if you don't stay out of MY SPACE

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Why did they choose Madonna to perform in the halftime show? Because she might die soon.

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What did the players of the all black NBA team say to the white rookie? "Congratulations for making it to the NBA! Your hard work and dedication has certainly paid off."

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Your mom is so stupid that she failed out of high school and now has two jobs to support her family.

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George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

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Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Imaj. Imaj who? Haha, you're a Jew.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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CHUCK NORRIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!$$$$bOoBiEs

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What do you call a man who tripped on a rock? A man who tripped on a rock.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was at a crosswalk and had the right of way to on coming traffic

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don't take life to seriously nobody gets out alive

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops