How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, others don't

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What's worse that tripping over on your way home from work? Finding your entire family murdered

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A man in a state penitentiary drops his soap. He then picks it up and continues his shower.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Not Sally."

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What's funny about your mom? Nothing, she died three weeks ago.

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A man says to his wife, "Honey, sex just hasn't been the same lately." "That's probably because of my yeast infection," replies his wife.

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What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? You aren't married to a girlfriend.

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Why did the black man jump high? He was on a pogo stick

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NEVER

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Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Nothing.

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If little Timmy buys 80 candy bars and eats 67, how many candy bars does he have left? Diabetes. Timmy has diabetes. So he was disowned.

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RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

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The elephant moonwalked. On the moon.

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Q: Why were there four married men in one room without their pants on? A: because it was the mens bathroom.

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my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

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What's wrong with you? I have no idea.

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people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

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Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

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have you seen stevie wonder's harmonica? neither has he.

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i asked my friend about the holocaust... umm it turns out hes a jew yaaa sorry then i screamed califona fire asin tits then ran

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I recently sent 10 puns to a joke website, hoping that one of them would win a competition. Unfortunately, they were deemed offensive.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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