Why doesn't the chicken cross the road Because his dad got ran over by a car when he crossed the road

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a depressed alcoholic drug addict whose children had all been diagnosed with a rare form of terminal brain cancer, and he decided to end it then and there by jumping in front of an approaching bus.

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why was the asian women such a bad driver? she was blind and had no arms

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It was the week of the school formal and a girl rang up her date and said I don't have a dress for the formal. He said ok the lets go out and buy one. So they went to the dress shop to buy one but the line was really, really long so they waited in the dress line for ages and ages until they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. As they did, the girl said well I suppose you need a suit, so they went to the suit shop, and again, the suit line was really long but they waited in the suit line and they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. Then the guy said, well if we want to go to the formal in style, then we will need a limo. So they went to the limo shop but the limo line was really long as well. But again, they waited in the limo line and they got to the front, paid and left. It was finally the night of the formal, she had her dress, he had his suit and they arrived in their limo. Everyone was having a great time and the the girl said to her partner, I'm a bit thirsty could you please get me a drink? So the guy went over to the drinks table and went to get a glass of punch but there was no punch line.

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There was a blonde, brunette and red head driving in a car. The car breaks down so the three of them decide to walk. So the red head takes water bottles, the brunette takes food and the blonde took the car. The red head asked the brunette why she was taking the food, the brunette said "incase i get hungry i can eat" then the brunette asked the red head why she brought water the red head said "incase i get thirsty i can have a drink. Then the brunette asked the blonde why she brought the car the blonde said "to drive home".

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whats the same about a red crayon and a blue crayon? there both the same color except for the blue one

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Two fish are in a tank. One asks the other, "How do you drive this thing?"

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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Why did the Jewish man commit suicide? Because he was not happy with his life.

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Whats the difference between Sarah Palin and Jason Voorhees? Jason has a chainsaw.

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What did one apple say to the other???? Well, since they are fruits, and not people, they were unable to talk...

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What did the fish say to the Asain man Nothing. a fish can not talk

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

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What's black, white, and red all over?? A penguin that just got hit by a truck and is now struggling to live.

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How is a presidential election like Alien vs. Predator? Whoever wins, we lose.

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What do you get when you kill justin beiber? A medal..

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why don't you ask the chicken. I am sorry but I as a human being am totally incapable of understanding and communicating with chickens.

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what's black, white and doesn't float? the titanic

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look at your sister now look at me now look at your sister now look at me you probably have now realized that you cant see me.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This poem is getting old, I like cookies.

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Why did the small 12 year old run away which a chicken. He felt like it and he was carrying bread which the chicken was allergic to.

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What starts with "P" and ends with "orn"? Popcorn

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how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

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roses are blue violets are blue everything is blue I'm sad now

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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