why did my BFF hate me?i called her an idiot on all the holidays including her birthday

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a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite. He died the following day.

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Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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What do you call a seedless pumpkin? A pumpkin.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Doesn't matter get in the van.

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It lost it's grip on the branch and was unable to break it's fall before reaching the ground.

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what did the grandma do after she was pushing up daisies? washed her hands because gardening is a dirty activity

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Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

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So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue In Soviet Russia Poem tells You -Ben

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An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

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why did the mexican work for a lawn care service I don't know why don't you ask him

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

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What is yellow outside, black inside, and makes you laugh when it falls? A school bus full of black people falling from a clif

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a ginger named corey walks into a bad and gets pistol whipped after raping his classmate

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9/11 my birthday

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Why did the child say he had been a ubused. Answer: because he had been.

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ACT 2 CHAPTER 4 GEARS OF WAR 3 TICKER EASTER EGG.... MICHAEL VICKS HOUSE

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Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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