What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

A horse walks into a bar and Shits John Taffer is Pissed

What do you get when you stab a six year old with a pair of scissors and a machete? A very angry, potentially murderous mother out for revenge.

why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? He likes bungie jumping, and wanted to cheer himself up by doing one of his favorite hobbies

What's worse than the holocaust? Microwaveable jellied horse nipple

whats the difference between a black guy and a park bench? well a park bench is an inanimate object that people use to sit on and feed the birds at the park. and a black guy is a living being who is looked down upon in society.

When were in a zombie apocalypse I will make sure to save you for 40 days and then I will sacrifice you

What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

Why did the KFC worker dislike his job? He was paid lower than minumum wage due to the plummeting economy.

A man walks into a bar and is slowly tearing his life apart. maybe because he is drinking poisonous acid instead of beer

Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

Why did the gay guy walk into a straight bar To find the better looking guys

Bitch

What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

Q Why did the chicken cross the road A Nobody knows why because nobody is psych

What word starts with N and ends with R that you never want to call a black person? Neighbor.

Hey how is your wife and my kids

What do you get when you cross Dracula and a snowman. Probably a little startled from the man's Dracula costume and a little chilly because the weather is cold enough to support a snowman.

Sharing means caring, Caring is socialism

Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she's a woman

One man walks on a bridge, another man sees him but doesn't really care about him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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