What do you call a used garden tool? A dirty hoe (not ho)

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family

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Why don't blind people skydive? They do.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Somebody call animal control, there's a horse in the bar." The horse is then taken away and made into glue and dog food.

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What did Jesus say to Moses? Jesus isn't real. Moses replied, "Do you think I'm stupid? I'm talking to him!"

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What's the difference between an Asian driver and a Belgian prostitute? Nothing at all: Marie-Edith Yang is proud of her mixed heritage, and earns a decent wage in a relatively clean brothel in the lovely little medieval town of Bruges.

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knock knock go away

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Were you born yesterday? Because I've got an erection...

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American healthcare.

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Why was the mom sad cause she had an abortion

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What do you call a women out of the Kitchen? Nothing because they shouldn't be

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Why did Napoleon cross his legs? Because he had to go to the bathroom

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YO momma is so fat she suffers from cardiovascular illnesses.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

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Q:why was the man on a two seated bycicle by himself? A:his wife had recently died and he wasn't ready to let go

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you, me and i need to stop doing meth!

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What's in there? Get outta there...

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What part of the cape were you on? Cod.

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chuck norris is a little b|tch

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Womens rights.

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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Your mum is so fat, she has a larger bmi than someone with a healthy bmi

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What did the young girl with leukemia say to a stranger? I am afraid

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? - Getting raped by an giant scorpion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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