Your mother is so heavy that she decided to try out nutrisystem

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A woman stopped making sandwiches.

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Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

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roses are green violets are green i was drunk last night

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What is the difference between my dog and my girlfriend? I love my dog

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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A blonde, a redhead and a brunette were on an island. There were loads of other people too - the UK is a pretty popular place to live.

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Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

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A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

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Why did the horse say moo? Because it's a cow

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Why did the Black man cross the road? To get to Pop-Eye's since KFC is too expensive nowadays. HELL-YA

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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A guy is at a party and he's really thirsty, so he goes to get a drink. He goes to get some soda, but the line is too long. He goes to get some water, but the line is also too long. He goes to get some punch, and it turns out there's no punch line.

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? Because he got hit by a bus.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? The lawyer is a human being whose profession is to give legal advice and assistance to clients and represent them in court or in other legal matters while the catfish is a freshwater or marine fish with whiskerlike barbels around the mouth, typically bottom-dwelling. -BG_Shank_A

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Q. How do you wake up a sleeping rich man? A. By splashing acid in his face

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How many Jews can fit in a Volkswagen beetle? Four, although five is possible if you are not afraid of getting a ticket.

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What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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Roses are red My parents are dead I am Batman.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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Your momma is so black that she probably has ancestors indigenous to Africa.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops