An Atheist sneezed. Everyone around him said, "God bless you." He thanked them and continued on with his day.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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The man who invented the teleprompter has died at the age of 91. When President Obama heard the news, he was speechless.

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Why did the accountant die?A terrorist put a bomb under his desk.

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Q. How can you tell if your arm is broken? A. Break it.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: I didn't get to ask. He got hit by a car.

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Sometimes while i am play my music loudly in my apartment my neighbor knocks on the wall He is slowly losing his grip on reality and believes the wall is a door

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why did the elephant fall out of the tree? it was hit by a fridge. why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was sellotaped to the elephant.

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What do you call six white guys on a bench? Six white guys at the park

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What is the difference?

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whats funnier than a black person dieing nothing that is so cruel

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Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

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you know whats not funny white boards.

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a man makes a bad joke

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What did the bank clerk say to the robber when he demanded all the money in the drawer? "Okay."

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How do you have sex with 9 giraffes? you don't because that's weird

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How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

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Then I contracted bronchitis from the smoke. Unfortunately I don't not have time to visit a doctor to mend this debilitation. In fact, nobody does.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

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Roses are red Violets are blue. most poems rhyme but this one doesn't!

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How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth? With a blender. How do you get them out? Nachos (make a dipping and snacking motion).

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Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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Who is the most vile man in Britain? Jerry Carr, the guy who works at the casino.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops