What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

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Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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Two black guys walk into a bar the bartender says get out

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

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A black guy and a white guy both get pulled over by a cop for speeding. The white guy is promptly released with a stern warning, whle the black guy is thouroughly questioned and has his car searched for drugs, with the probable cause being that the black guy has bloodshot eyes, reeks of weed and has a bong in his frontseat.

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Why did the blond fall down? She died.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Jews are human beings. Pizza is a type of food.

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roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

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What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

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joe galasso from plainview ny

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A man walked in the kitchen with a gun. He made a sandwich.

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Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

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HOW TO RE-AD : FOR DUMMIES. (HELLEN KELLER ADDITION)

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What did one ginger say to the other? W are both gingers.

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I was hungrey then i saw a man puke. Im still very hungrey. Then i threw up. Im not so hungrey

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Person 1: Why can't a T-Rex clap? Person 2: BECAUSE THEIR ARMS ARE TOO SMALL! Person 1: No, because they are extinct dumbass

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

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What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON. And Michael Jackson was a child molester.

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jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

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How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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