"Knock knock," said the guy about to deliver a knock knock joke.

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What happens when you cut a body in half? An erection.

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What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

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What's Michael J Fox's favorite toy? While, a magic 8-ball might first appear to be a good guess. Let's be honest, those things really lose their luster after the first couple times. More likely it's something like a sports car or big screen television.

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A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

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Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

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What did the star say to the asteroid? Nothing, astral bodies can't talk, you dipshit.

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What's Brown and Sticky? A Stick

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A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

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Why do people waste time reading these jokes. Because they like anti jokes.

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What shouldn't you say to a dementia patient? You already said that.

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How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

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The chicken didn't cross the road. Therefor, there is no why.

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a mountainous mound of slain human offspring? There is none, the second is conferred to the subject of a conversation using a highly advanced vernacular.

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roses are red violets are blue maskrosor are gula

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An aspiring lawyer walks into a Bar. He will find out if he passed in a few months.

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“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

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What happened after Jimmy fell off the cliff? He died.

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what did the man say to the other man? hey

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You know what sucks? A vacuum.

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How do you rape someone? No, its a question. I don't know the best way to go about this.

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A man runs into a bar and yells "Ow!!" He is hospitalized due to severe trauma to the head and spine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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