Will I be watching The Voice tonight? no.

The New York Giants

Why should you never attempt to rob Chuck Norris? Because he will beat you up as he knows self defense.

Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? There was no cross walk.

Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

Roses are red Violets are blue Thats what they tell me because I'm blind

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

Why was Reed sad? His mother has a penis

Why isn't eating an Olympic sport? Because that wouldn't make any sense.

1: Hey whats better than bacon? 2: What? 1: Nothing. Nothing is better than bacon.

what did Tim do when he got married? He kissed the bride Mecheoo LOVES ASS

Why did andy fall down Because his friend pushed him over

A child walks into a bar. I swear those jungle gyms are too short.

What did the chicken say when it layed the square egg? Ouch.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? (Because she was blind and deaf?) No, because she was a woman.

Where did Suzy go after the explosion? - Everywhere.

"knock, knock" "who is there?" Gestapo

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him and got better.

roses are red vilotes are blue i thought i was bent but then i met you

Carlos was on the computer writing anti-jokes. They all scuked.

Q:Why did the man fall down the stairs? A:Because someone pushed him down.

What do you call a black man running faster than a white man? Usain Bolt

Roses are shut the f*** up. Violets are shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up.

What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut... A Heart Attack.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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