What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Nothing, you heartless asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

a man was walking out side to get the news paper what happened next he picked up the newspaper

thumb_up thumb_down +16

I saw a stray dog the other day So I petted it and got on my way.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock Knock Whos there Cameron oh

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Three men were lost in a desert when a genie appeared and granted them each a wish. they died of dehydration shortly afterward, never realizing they were hallucinating.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

thumb_up thumb_down +16

whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Little Jack Horner sat in a corner, Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you wake a sleeping bear? Kick it.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Whats worse than a truck full of dead babies? A live baby trying to eat his way out.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

thumb_up thumb_down +16

catastrophic anthropogenic global warming

thumb_up thumb_down +16

a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the chicken do? He crossed the road.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Yo mama so short she often has to ask you to retrieve items from the top shelf of her cabinet.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Yo mamma's so stupid, she couldn't get a high paying job and had to settle for working full time at McDonalds, just to get your family through the week.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A black man walks into a bar full of white people. And then... He orders his drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

I saw 2 jews talking. I threw in a penny and watched them fight to the death. I did the same with 2 catholic preasts exept I threw in a baby boy

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock, knock. Now before I asked "Who's there" I first opened the door as then I can see who's there without having to ask them through the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Whats old and has been alone for years. Your dead nan

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a homeless man in Beverly Hills? Charles, Someone who unfortunately had to drop out of school at a young age to work to support his dying mother. Hence, later in life, after his mother died, lacked the education to be enrolled in college forcing him to pimp to make enough money to eat and pay for the rent in his one bedroom appartment in his hometown-Mississippi. But times were tough in Mississippi and not many people could afford a whore. This forces him to go all the way to California where he found more people there were willing to pay for a whore. Business was good and soon enough he had enough money for a decent condo. But Charles still morned the death of his mother. Eventually he couldn't take the daily pressure of being a pimp and thought of his mothers death, so he turned to heroin. Soon all his money was fueling his addiction and before he knew it he was on the street, with no one to help him and no where's to go. Every night he goes to sleep on his cardboard box with the memory of his late mother in the back of his head. Sometimes Charles wonders what he could of been if he didn't drop out of school, but he knows that what he did was the right thing.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

alert("Hello");

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops