What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Sharing means caring, Caring is socialism

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What's long and black The unemployment line

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people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

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I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

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A Jew, a Catholic, and a Muslim walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What'll you have?" The Jew says, "I'll have a whiskey straight." The Catholic says, "I'll have a vodka tonic." The Muslim says, "I can't drink it's against my religion and I really shouldn't be here."

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Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

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What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

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What did the man with one eye say to the woman with one leg at 2 p.m? Good afternoon.

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Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

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A man in a state penitentiary drops his soap. He then picks it up and continues his shower.

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Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

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Why did the McCann's parent's leave the window's and doors open? Because Portugal is a very hot climate, And they expected the place they were staying to be safe as lot's of tourist's stay there throughout the year.

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Is Barack Obama a dentist, a teacher, or the president of the United States? A dentist. He just happens to have the same name as the president.

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Q: What did the black kid get for Chirstmas? A: Your bike

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How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

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Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

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time to spruce up!

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So, there's three blondes. Two of them walk into a bar. The third one missed it.

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Q: What lives in holes? A: Jerks.

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9/11

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A pogo stick. Just kidding. Cancer.

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Q: what did Don Draper do after he saw an attractive woman at the ABC store? A: went home and thought about her while drinking his scotch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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