How do you tickle a tree? you dont you are a schizo stop kicking leaves

How do you make a dog drink? Put one in a blender.

A German and an American walk into a bar. George W. Bush got hurt, but Albert Einstein didn't.

Why do Jews fast for Yom Kippur? It's part of their tradition.

What do you call a black man wearing tights? Rick

Knock knock, Who's there? Justin Bieber, LEAVE!

Knock Knock! Who's There! That's right! And now for our next song: "Magic Bus!" One TwoThree Four.....

What do you call it when you almost win? You lose.

Why did a little kid's mom let go of his hand? John Wilks Booth shot her

Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

Why did the black dude die? Because everyone must die at some point.

Knock Knock The occupant uses their peephole and realizes it is a familiar face then proceeds to let them in.

If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

what is the worst thing to find out about for wife she is your arm

Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

Hello! I am Harry Potter, and i will be teaching you pottery today! Yes, call me Mr. Pottery!

Yo mama so old when I slapped her on the back her tits fell off.

What happened when the chicken crossed the road? It entered a KFC and had the unfortunate suprise of having its head cut off.

A farmer accidentally trips his wife. She falls down the stairs and the farmer is quickly arrested for murder.

Why doesn't my mom make dinner anymore? she died in a fire on my birthday.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got run over on the way there.

Jesus walks into a bar, the bartender shoot the zombie

What do you call a Mentally Challenged Black Man? Whatever Name his parent(s) Gave him at birth.

Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. But Jack still couldn't out run that bullet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...