A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

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How often does the lesbian vampire group meet up? Never. Lesbians don't exist.

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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Why did the mokey board the westbound train? I said gray umbrella noodle head!

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:) Hey AMBY VALENT! Want to join our horsehead show below?? *Laughing track with that fat loud bitch that wont stop laughing making the actors stare at each other like douches* :/ Muuh, I dont really care im just some meh character anyway so yuh...' *Laughing track* ? ???? ORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA! :( Hey get outta our show here you China man! *OOOH! Track plays with some fa*ott whistling* ? ???? | Baka! *leaves* *Awww track plays* *Laughing track*

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What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

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So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

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One walrus says to the other, "Why are you shaking like that?" The other walrus says, " I've been addicted to ectasy for three years. It's ruining my life."

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Why did the frog die? Because I stapled it onto a boy's face.

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If a blonde and a brunette fell off a cliff who would reach the ground first? The blonde because she was fatter.

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What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

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Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

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why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

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A man walks into a bar. Oh, wait, no. It was a horse. So... A man walks into a horse

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How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice tits

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Your mom is so fat, she went to the hospital, and they intern, turned her exess fat into 12 babies.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

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A guy is at a party and he's really thirsty, so he goes to get a drink. He goes to get some soda, but the line is too long. He goes to get some water, but the line is also too long. He goes to get some punch, and it turns out there's no punch line.

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What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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A man is sleeping and is woken up. What does he say? Why did you wake me up

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An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

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What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

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What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket. What's blue and looks like a bucket? A red bucket in disguise.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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