what do you call a black guy with a nice car? most probably a rapper or professional athlete, however there is also a great chance that he is a doctor of philosophy and well educated.

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What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

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What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

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Your mother is so heavy that she decided to try out nutrisystem

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One walrus says to the other, "Why are you shaking like that?" The other walrus says, " I've been addicted to ectasy for three years. It's ruining my life."

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roses are green violets are green i was drunk last night

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so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

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What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? - "Get down"

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What is the difference between my dog and my girlfriend? I love my dog

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Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

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Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

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Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

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A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

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How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

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whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

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Why does Snoop Dogg have an umberella? For shielding himself from the rain.

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Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

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I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

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Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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