Q: What's blue and yellow all over? A: A baby at the bottom of the pool with a slashed floatie. Q: What's red and yellow all over? A: A floatie at the top of a pool with a slashed baby.

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roses are red violets are blue this verse doesn't ryhme and neither does this one

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What's worse than having two girlfriends at once. Seven. Seven girlfriends. All across America.

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A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

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What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

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What color is an orange chicken? Fried rice

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My title of old was Satan. You humans killed my brother, ending God the holy trinity`s stay on earth, the Gods Omega. Moral: And yet you call ME? THE ANTICHRIST?!? I OFFERED HIM WATER! YOU OFFERED HIM TORTURE AND DEATH!

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Why was the girl angry? She's PMSing. Give her a banana and stay away.

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Why did Santa go to a rap concert? Because Santa was a rapper

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What's the thing that freaks guys out the most? When you're about to have sex with a girl and it turns out she had a penis and it's bigger than yours

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Q: Why did Jimmy not have balls? A: A terrible, terrible sand paper accident.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

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Why did you laugh at this joke. Because it was funny.

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What do you call a lawyer without a brain? -Dead

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What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan? One baby in 10 trashcans.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a mexican? The skin pigmentation and most likely the size of their penis

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joe paterno doesn't walk into a police station

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What do you call a person with cancer A hospital patient, what did you expect? Oh. Of course you expected Chewbacca.

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Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent get brutally murdered.

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yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

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Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he was hungry. The teacher would stupid to say it was a piece of cake

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What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

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What did the Rabbi say when the Priest asked how his family was? The Rabbi breaks into tears as he explains his family was killed in the Holocaust.

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A: Rock! B:Paper! C: Siccorz! D: Shoot! D: Jimmy, you alright buddy? I didn't mean for that bullet to hit you man..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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