What's long, dark, and smelly? The unemployment line.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than finding The Holocaust in your apple? Most things, because that's impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a pack of wolverines and decided the best idea was to run away, and this decision just happened to involve him crossing a road.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a black man and an Asian working in a field? You politely ask their names and then use them; their colour is of no consequence.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

it was all Tagart

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: Why didn't Little Jhonny go to school today? A: There was no school today.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why would a man mistake a watermelon for AK-47? i dont know. The man probably has mental issues.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Mary had a little lamb Little lamb Mary had a little lamb That Mary wanted to blow Because Mary was into beastiality

thumb_up thumb_down -2

apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Dislike if you are a prostitute

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: Why didn't Dwight D. Eisenhower play with the silly putty? A: Because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man walks into a bar. He is knocked unconscious, and passers-by rush to his aid.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the little boy fall down the tree? He didn't. He jumped.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Can Anti-Jokes censor curse-word tenses? Fuck Fucking Fucked Fucks

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How did the black man fall of the cliff? He was gazing over and realized he had Prostate cancer and fell off the cliif.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock, knock who's there? Not your Dad, because he left and created a better family.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A house comes around the corner.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops