What do you get when you breed a dog and a cat together? A call from the RSPCA.

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Q: What causes earthquakes? A: Your mother walking.

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Q: Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench. A: A bench is an object and a mexican is a human being.

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Why did the chcicken cross the road? To get to the other side nl

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what are you talking about. Nets are terrible. Lakers are going to be the best.

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what would happen if american army lost their air supprt ? lmao

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What do you call a gay man having sex with a woman? Sex.

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Jovan

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what did the homeless man say to the stranger? nothing, he let he let his gun do the talking

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Roses are red Violets are blue We cant have sex I have ED

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What did the boy who was in a chainsaw accident yell to his mom when he was on a rollercoaster? Look ma, no hands!

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What did Hellen Keller say when she drove up to the stop sign? Nothing, she doesn't drive.

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RUN

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Q. Why did the lady scream when she saw her husband? A. Because he was dead.

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Did you fall on your head when you were a baby Oh, I very sorry.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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A black man goes down to Alabama in the 1960s; He gets lynched.

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A polish guy Is sick of being made fun of for his ethnicity, so he decides that he is going to act Italian thinking that no one makes fun of Italians. He stays home for weeks to practice this and one day walks out, up to a store and says"eh, get me some lasagna and zucchini !" the man at the store asks if he's polish.

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A man walks into a bar. Of chocolate. Yummy!

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hello there. I am Elder Young and I with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. What would you say if someone were to offer you peace and happiness through all of eternity?

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Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? it has no legs.

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Girl goes to see a sex therapist. Girl says, "Doc, though this has never been a problem, for the past 3 months I have been unable to reach climax. Can you help me?" Doc says, "Yes.". And after an intense 18 months of therapy the doctor helped the girl to discover that her inability to reach climax was related to issues of childhood sexual abuse. And after another 36 months of therapy the girl finally found the courage to confront and forgive her unrepentant abuser, as she realized that by not forgiving him, it was like drinking poison while hoping that he would die. And though the doctor did help her,as he had said, the girl never regained her ability to reach climax again.

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Yo mama is so old, she might die soon! - Louis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops