what is orange red and blue, has wheels , and can talk? i don't know that's why i asked you

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A horse walks into the bar and says "why the long face?" The bartender replies "hey! I was supposed to say that!"

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Hitler.

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How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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If you work at Penn State you might want to skip the annual "bring your kid to work day"

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Why couldn't the Asian man speak in chinese? He never learned chinese

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What's orange and rhymes with a parrot. A carrot

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old people are like slinkies...they arent really good for anything but brings a smile to ur face when they're pushed down the stairs...just think about it ;)

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What do you call a dog with 3 legs? Just because it has 3 legs dosnt mean you have to call it anything different

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Let's play twenty questions. Alright, but I have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

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What do you call a penguin in the desert? Most likely a dead penguin.

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I used to say "I used to be an adventurer like you but then I took an arrow to the knee" like you but then I took an arrow in the knee.

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Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? She was a mother catering for her child's sporting event.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Does this rag smell Like chloroform to you?

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Mine.

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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What did the apple say to the carrot? Nothing, apples don't talk

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what's the best way to remove leaves from a tree? take them off

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

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- Why an Asian crossed the road? - Because he wanted to.

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Why did dave not hug his wife? becuase he said she looked horrifying from the war in iraq.

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What did the kid say when the doctor said he had cancer Oh No

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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