How do you confuse a bus driver? Go invisible and throw bananas at him

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What did Nick Comado say to the black person? Hello I live at 317 North 12th Street, Beech Grove, Indiana, USA. PLEASE come murder me and my family

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

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Q. What happened to the girl who locked her keys in her car? A. I raped her.

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What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

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WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

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Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? Everywhere

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My Friend Philip had his lip removed today. he is just Phil now.

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What's white and black and red all over A nun with a spear throug her head

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Q: What's worse than burning your tongue on hot chocolate. A: Getting shanked by a homeless man

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A snail buys a car from a dealership, and then asks the manager if he could paint a large S on the side of the car. The manager agrees, and the snail drives away. From the parking lot, the manager sees the car go straight on to the highway and get hit by a truck. Unfortunately, snails cannot drive.

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Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" the horse, confused, looks at the bartender with a bewildered look, neighs loudly, and runs out of the bar knocking over a few tables and chares.

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What happened to the guy who took more lineage then he should have? He went to sleep.

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Chuck Norris has appeared in several action films.

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What's the difference between a chicken and a 3 legged dog? There are numerous differences. I will not however go into the biological explanations of these differences.

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How many omish people did it take to screw in a lightbulb.

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Three drunk llamas wearing sombreros are walking down the street. They walk in silence, lost in their own thoughts.

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Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? You apparently are not a fan of lemons what so ever, so you then throw them away, not knowing what to expect.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the farmer let him out, and he found a road to cross!

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Why couldnt the boy hang out with his friend? because when he called his friend to ask him to hang out he had badd cel phone service. so he went to the other room to call him on his landline but unfortunately his parents have had a rough month at work and therfore could not pay the bill and having there phone lines cut off. this left his only option to mail him a letter asking if he wanted to hang out. he spent about 4 hours writing the 10 page letter asking his friend if he wanted to hang out. when he was finished writing the letter, he went to the drwer to find an envelope and a stamp. unfortunately no envelopes or stamps could be found. so the boy had to walk down town to the post office to pick some up. he had to walk bc since his parents have been having a rough time at work, theyve been working extra hours to help put food on the table and give their son the educaion he needs to become succesful in his life. wen he gets back from the post office with the supplies he needed to mail the letter, he put it in the mail box and put the flag up. but the mail had alreeady come that day so he had to wait tilll monday for the letter to be deliverd since tommorow was sunday and everyone knows that the mail does not come on mondays. when the mail came, the mailman took the letter and eventually deliverd it. he knew it was deliverd bc he traveld online but since there was no internet connection because of his parents failing to pay the bill, he had to go to the library to use the computer. the boy waited a week but his friend never wrote back. so his only other option to find out if his friend wanted to hang out was to simply walk over to his house and ask him in person. since the boy was a little impatient and hess been waiting several day for an answer, he decided to run over instead of walk. as he was approaching his friends house, instead of walking all the way around the road to walk on the cross walk he figured it would take alot less time to just cross the road right then and there. as he stepped onto the road a huge bus sped right by him, almost hitting him. this startled the boy. the boy walked up to his friends door, knocked, and the boy answerd. he asked if he wanted to hang out and his friends said no, pushed him into the street, and the boy was hit by a drunk driver. the boy was rushed to the hospital where they barely just saved his life. although his life was saved he was forced to live on life suppport for the rest of his life. 3 months into being on life support, the same friend came to visit him in the hospital. his friend says, u wanna no why i didnt wanna hang out with you? and the boy said yes. so his friend says "well...." the friend then pull the plug on the boys life support and the boy dies

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Why don't you want to shout "Hi" to your friend Jack on an airplane? Because he's deaf and will not hear you.

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Whats the differnce betwwen a Wheelbarrow and a sack of dead babies The wheelbarrow is not in my garage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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