Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

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roses are red violets are blue i have shit in my mouth so screw you

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knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

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the sky is green no it is not

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Nero, I can barely stay awake, can we chat more later today though? I would really enjoy that, and sleep before that.

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Why couldnt the girl braid her hair? She had cancer

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop? zero if you bite it

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Why did the fish fly It didn't

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Why is the boy lying down on the floor? The chandelier fell on him.

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what did the girl say after her boyfriend proposed? she said no because they've still got a lot of stuff to deal with before they even consider getting married and he seriously needs to get a job and dump his other girlfriend.

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That Rachael chick needs to get back in the kitchen

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What do two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

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Why did the clown fall out of the tree? He got shot.

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How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

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Why do people make fun of Laquesha? Because she's white.

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Yo' Mama's so old that her age is over the average age of most people.

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My dad died on Mothers Day, my mother was happy. Actually Iied, we were all sad.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

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why do police kill so many young black men in America? it's a difficult question that deserves a thoughtful response. many complex issues are at play, but we also feel a sense that something must be done. we cannot ignore some of the forces at work here, yet we cannot all personally take responsibility, either. or maybe he wanted to steal his girl. that shit really happens. THAT SHIT LEGIT HAPAPNES.

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On a scale of 1 to 10, 7 being the highest, what is you favorite color

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was stressed & having alot of financial, mental and physical problems so he crossed the road in hope to kill himself. And he did he got ran over by a car, may his soul rest in peace.

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Why didn't the jew eat pork? He was vegetarian.

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Two muffins are in an oven. Neither of them talk due to the fact that they are muffins and are inanimate, therefore denying them the ability to talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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