A man walks into a shop and picks up some items for his party. He walks out of the shop without paying for the items. The police are promptly called and the man receives a 4 year sentence in prison for shoplifting.

My dog dumps in my house she looks at me and says rut row

Deja moo: The feeling you've heard this bull before.

How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

What did the cow say to the butcher? At least I'm not a Jew.

Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

What do you get when you throw a white hat in the red sea? A wet hat.

Little Johnny walked into class one day. The teacher announced their would be a pop-quiz on the declaration of independence. Johnny passed. (ic3)

What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

Henry was struck by a train. He was mourned by his parents.

What's Red, Smells like Blue Paint, What tastes like the sea, and has been doused in the essence of the 80's? If you can come up with something, don't bother; This is a trick question. The space was to give you time to think. Forget your answer.

What did the Jew do before the movie? He turned off his cell phone.

Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella? For rain.

knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

A man walks into a bar he orders a drink

what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

a guy went to a bar and ordered a molotov cocktail. he died.

Was the worlds most expensive comedian any fun? Well, he was funny, but they where all cheap laughs. Moral: Expensive jokes are expensive.

Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

Roses are Red Lemons are Sour Pull Down Your Pants And Give Me an Hour

What are the biggest ants in the world? Ants under a magnifying glass.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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