why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

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Obama Getting Re-Elected.

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Q:How many pieces of paper can one tree make? A:Trees cannot make paper, people make paper from trees. So the answer is none, a tree can't make any paper whatsoever.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Dog. Dog who? I have a dog.

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A man walks out of his house and sees a......BIRD!!!

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How does a yeti say hi? Raaawwwrrrr

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Why did the Jewish man bend down to pick up a penny? Because he had dropped it and required the penny as part of his payment for his food.

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What did the Christian say to the Muslim. Nothing. He understood his right to have a opinion even if his religion is against it.

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why couldnt the baby walk through the door? because it had a javeline through its head.

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You know why no ones tried to kill Obama ? Picture him in an escalade!

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Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I f*cked your mom You have aids.

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Whats better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table has legs.

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What did the black man say to the white man? "Hi"

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Why did the girl trip in the middle of the street? She tripped over the kid who dropped his ice cream because he got hit by a bus.

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper... used to clean up a crime scene.

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A sixty Year old man walks into a bank to rob it. He tells the bank teller, "Take the money and put it into a bag!" The teller told him, "Sir I don't have a bag." So the old man turns around and walks out.

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Why did a 36 year old Asian man stop in the middle of raping someone A: He realized that what he was doing was immoral and that it could scar someone for the rest of there lives and that he could serve a sentence of up to 35 years which would mean he would miss out on the special offers that QVC has to offer during this time

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Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Hello? Prankster: Hello is your regrigerator running? Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Yes... Prankster: Oh good. I was just calling to make sure. Have a good day!

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Why did the baby crawl onto the road? because a sick bastard put a bottle of milk there knowing that a bus would be going through that route soon.

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Q: What do you call a person with no arms and no legs ??? A: Stumpy

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oooooooooooooo yeah write there thats the spot what i was talking about my car

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because death was certain if it didn't.

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Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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