What's black and white all over and has a mouth? A Zebra

Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

One day Rebecca Black was driving down the street in a brand new convertible Luckily a policeman pulled her over after observing that she was far too young to be driving a car. Underage driving is a serious offense and should not be endorsed in music videos.

The teachers cat is a fat cat and his name is ... why do even whant to know you stalker

Why did the jew go to the doctors? Because he had a severe headache.

Q: How long does it take to dig to China? A: 5 mins. I hire a bunch of mexicans

yo mama's so dumb, she had to retake the 11th grade.

A gay man goes out with a butch lesbian and develops a loving relationship, years later they get married and have kids, adopting them from the local orphanage and lives happily ever after.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says, "Boy, it sure is hot in here!" The other muffin says nothing because it is a muffin.

Yo mama so fat, she was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes and has been instructed by her physician to exercise and regularly monitor her blood glucose levels.

Knock, knock! Who's there? Mary Mary who? Mary Smith.

We're no strangers to love You know the rules and so do I A full commitment's what I'm thinking of You wouldn't get this from any other guy I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling Gotta make you understand Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you We've known each other for so long Your heart's been aching, but You're too shy to say it Inside, we both know what's been going on We know the game and we're gonna play it And if you ask me how I'm feeling Don't tell me you're too blind to see Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you (Ooh, give you up) (Ooh, give you up) Never gonna give, never gonna give (Give you up) Never gonna give, never gonna give (Give you up) We've known each other for so long Your heart's been aching, but You're too shy to say it Inside, we both know what's been going on We know the game and we're gonna play it I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling Gotta make you understand Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you

shut up elliot

There is a bus driving down the street, suddenly a man jumps out of the buss and splatters on to the sidewalk, why does he jump out? the buss driver was asian

(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

How many fat people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three. One to hold the ladder, another to screw it in. The third one stands to the side, just in case it breaks.

Who is married to Uncle Joke? Antijoke.

why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

Why did the black man walk into the catholic church? He was catholic.

your mom is so ugly, when she throws a boomerang it doesn't come back

What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? They're both purple expect the rabbit

what did the banana say to the orange? nothing because a banana is a fruit

what do you call the quadriplegic man who went water skiing? Skip

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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