What did one lawyer say to the other? Hello

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Your mom is so old that her organs are starting to slowly fail and she must be put on life support or she'll die.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Your mom is so fat that her doctor told her to go on a diet.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

The boy gets shot in the face, he then dies of childhood obesity.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

cccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccorn

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the horse say to it's owner? It didn't horses can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was suicidal.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why is did the blonde cross the road? She was trying to catch the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the Rabbi say when the Priest asked how his family was? The Rabbi breaks into tears as he explains his family was killed in the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Hamsters are a lot like cigarettes. They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo "who"? Boo Radley. I live down the street.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How can you tell if a duck is under your bed? Look under your bed

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the cow say to the butcher? At least I'm not a Jew.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why do Jews fast for Yom Kippur? It's part of their tradition.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock! Who's There! That's right! And now for our next song: "Magic Bus!" One TwoThree Four.....

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo mama so old when I slapped her on the back her tits fell off.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did a little kid's mom let go of his hand? John Wilks Booth shot her

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops