What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

Once upon of time, there was an ugly duckling. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

How can you ruin someone's day? Tell them their mother has cancer. No really, I found out my mom has cancer a week ago.

Go to this website and this game is an antijoke to laugh at http://iamhelenkeller.com/

What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

Where's the soap?

Doctor Doctor! I think im turning into a carrot! Thats a side effect of the drugs Alice, We've just had your test results back. I'm sorry Alice, You've got HIV.

Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

There are two jews in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here" and the other says "AHH A TALKING JEW"

Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reality TV.

Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

There were three men walking across the road and it started to rain

Yo mamas so poor, she should probably find a source of consistent payment to support herself.

what did the man say to the doctor? how the hell would i know, ask him yourself.

there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes You should probably get yourself checked.

a pope and a catholic priest walk into a bar... the priest orders... then the pope says to the bartender "I'll have what hes having." so the bartender takes out a small child and says ...."are you sure?"

how many jews does it take to fit in a mid-size sedan? -5 comfortably.

Why'd the plane crash? Because the pilot was an orange.

whats got two legs and cant walk a paraplegic

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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