The number 69 is? Just a plain old number that has just as much meaning as 68 and 70.

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A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

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Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

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antijoke is the best website.

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What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

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Doctor Doctor! I think im turning into a carrot! Thats a side effect of the drugs Alice, We've just had your test results back. I'm sorry Alice, You've got HIV.

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Why did the toddler fall over? He's an Iraqi child and has been shot in both legs, being readied for a public execution for fighting on the opposing side.

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Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

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Hi, how are you doing? Good, yourself? Fine, thanks. Have a nice day. You too, bye.

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Why do women live longer? Once their sexual and metabolistic hormones are moleculy different from men's, their metabolism is different and act on different organs and vice-versa. Therefore, they live longer. Still, in a worldwide average, more men born than women.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

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what's funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Pretty much anything because infant mortality is in no way funny

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A- a tv

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Why was the black Jew sad? He had to sit at the back of the oven

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why do elephants have such flat feet.....? from all those damn trees they have been juming out of....

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was suicidal.

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What happened when Stephen Hawking tried to go down the stairs? He fell and suffered minor injuries.

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In soviet russia, the cow milks you!

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how do you stop a black man from drowning take your foot off his head

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How do you unload a truck full of dead babies? With a pitch fork.

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Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

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why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

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roses are red, violets are blue, poems are stupid, refridgerator

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What is rainbow-colored, makes no sounds, and smells like a banana? A rainbow-colored banana

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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