Why are Mexicans so good at jumping, swimming and running? They aren't. You're just racist.

What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

What did the doctor say to the seriously ill patient? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

What do you get when you cross a computer with a whore? A:porn

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

A boy plays in his garden. Then he fall and his knee hurts a lot, but he doesn't cry. Do you know why? Because he's dead.

An asian walks into class to take a math test. He did not study and consistently misbehaves and promptly fails.

Adam eats ginger nuts the fookin chicken

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

what do you call a clown in makeup? a clown, clowns are supposed to wear makeup.

Why was the man lying under a sheet. Because he was dead.

whats red and brown and goes about 30mph? a squirrel in a blender.

What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? 45 pounds. My girlfriend was a fatass. Wasn't gonna make that mistake again when I found a woman to marry.

In Soviet Russia, you wouldn't have a likely chance of surviving because of Stalin's mass paranoia and total neglect for his fellow man.

A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve You, but don't start anything."

What is lil Wayne's real name? Dwayne micheal carter jr.

What's red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple? The Color Wheel.

"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

An American, a Canadian, an Afro-American and a Jew walk in a bar. They all order their favorite drink and go look for potential partners with whom they'd wish to engage in sexual relationships.

How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

What's got two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

A Muslim walks into a bar, and has a pint of lager because he has chosen to integrate into his host country's culture. He then leaves without incident.

What do you get when you cross a Minotaur with a snowman? A cold mythological creature.

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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