Why did the boy fail the math test? He has a learning disability.

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What do you get if you cross a river with a cat? Wet.

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What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't a Ferrari in my garage

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a man walks into a bar and buys a drink

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? The extinction of the human species.

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Your momma's so old she might die soon.

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What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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What is the worst joke ever? This one.

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My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

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a guy walks in to a bar in iraq. 10 people died because of it

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from ebola

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What do Barney and a butchers knife have in common? One of them is purple

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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What's the richest fish in the sea? The one you threw a quarter at.

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Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

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What is small, yellowy-white and emits a kind of cheesy smell? A lump of cheese

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How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

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roses are red violets are blue this verse doesn't ryhme and neither does this one

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how do you crash a party? You dont because that would be rude.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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