So there was this cracker sitting on a bench. A pigeon picked it up and flew off. Probably ate it afterwards.

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How do you fix a chimpanzee? With a monkey wrench

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and a whale? Comment your answer:

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a white man, an asian man, and a mexican man are on a plane and they realize how inefficient the airline was in filling the flight, seeing as there were only three men on board.

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these guys im about to shoot owen,john,henry,shawn

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What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries! -by Ross

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Women outside of the kitchen.

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There are two blonds in a car, the driver to looks to the other blond (carelessly taking in her surroundings) They crash and the passenger is grusomely killed to the point of not being recognized and the driver later commits suicide from the guilt and pending law suit.

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're a whore

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour hot soup on his head.

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To mama's so fat that her escape velocity in her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s

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Did you hear about the young couple that confused K-Y jelly with window caulking? All their windows fell out.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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A man walks into a bar.. and has a bomb strapped to his chest

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Knock knock who's there?... a stupid punchline because the door is imaginary and I am just wasting your time telling a knock knock joke

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why was the pen mad at the pencil? it wasnt. objects don't have feelings

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what are you mike bibby?

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Why did the man launch his rocket into the sun? He didn't. Overcoming the sun's orbital pull would require your rocket to travel ~7,400,000 mph, which is a velocity that is impossible for today's rockets to reach.

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And you honored it I see :P

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Q: A giraffe fell in a hole and died. Which was taller the Lion or Giraffe? A: The Giraffe was before it died

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What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

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One day a duck was swimming on the lake and sees an alligator. The alligator says "You will be my next victim." The duck says "Quack."

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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