What do you call a man with no arms or legs on the doorstep? The Diabetes man

A mexican, an Aisian, and a black guy are fighting in a dumpster. Who wins? The Mexican, why? Home court advantage!

Q: How many teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they just sit in the dark and complain about it.

When birds fly south for the winter they fly in a V formation. one side is always longer than the other. why is that? Because there are more birds on that side

Girl 1: I just can't find the man who'll make the perfect husband for me. Girl 2: Maybe you're asking for too much. Girl 1: Yeah, probably.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

KENNAH CAMPIONS LAUGH

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Scientists are still unable to fully understand the brain functioning of chickens enough to comprehend their motives for doing such a thing.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

A man walks into a bar. He was the barman. [L]

Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

When my parents said that they chucked a flipper baby into the Atlantic ocean I assumed a baby seal, I later found out that happened to my disabled brother.

Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

What is small, red, and can't fit through a doorway? A baby with a spear through its head. Posted By: Lram

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a screaming goat

What did one alligator say to the other alligator? Ear

what happened when the shoe turned into a shoe.......... nothing, it was a raisin

A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

Why did the chicken cross the road? For a legitimate reason

What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

knock knock who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.

Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

What do you call an unconscious black man? An ambulance.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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