roses are red... violets are blue ..... Cancer

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your mom is so fat that she had to start going to a gym to exercise and get her weight under control.

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A strange man knocks at the door He's your son

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Who made it down the cliff first the blonde or brunet? The brunet, the blonde had to stop for directions

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whats white? everything thats not black, yellow, pink, red, blue, orange, purple, green, indigo, turquiose, grey, brown, khaki, gols, silver, bronze.

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I am the best i am the worst My wife was buried in hearse

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Why did the kid drop his ice-cream? Because he tripped on a dead guy!

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i am an arrow and i did not hit your knee!f

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Why doesn't Michael sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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Hah, I bet a faggot that lost his balls in the war is "above" such things as seduction and all things straight! 25 million US dollars, send them to me within a week, or I will hunt you down by tracking down every single one of your fucking followers (all six of them), and make you wish you where dead. And tell me where you live, send me your sister so I can rape her, send me your boyfriend so I can cut him to pieces, send my your children so I can make sure your genes stop, send my your mothers tits so I can hang them on my wall, and kill your father and post the shit on youtube! Maybe then we are halfway close a settlement.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Macy's was having a giant sale.

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What did the man say to the cat? I thought you were fake.

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What does a handsome guy and an ugly girl have in common? Nothing

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It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave

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Why did the black man buy a gun? Because he and his family live in a dangerous neighborhood.

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why did the fat woman die? ... because she tried to commit suicide and the ceiling collapsed on her.

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what did the little boy say to his mom? nothing his mother died in childbirth.

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Everybody has a penis! EVERY BODY! WHY can't feminists admit this obvious anatomical fact? Gahhhh!

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Tim is a bald headed prick with an annoying voice and he looks like a clean shaven Walter White if he was on the same drugs that he was making and he looks like he smokes too much because the wrinkles on his forehead look like lips.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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Two muffins were in an oven. The first muffin says: 'It sure is hot in here!' The second muffin says: 'Why are they only cooking two muffins?'

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Pandas Everywhere!!!

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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Why did nobody like Anne? She was disabled

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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