Q: how many babies does it take to paint a house red? A: It Depends on how hard you throw them

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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A man walks into a bar. He then takes a step back and notices that his head hurts.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

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Why did the clown have a heart attack? He had long term heart problems.

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What sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler.

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Many people believe that dogs are mammals. They're right

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Whats the difference between a man and a cat. There both different species.

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Sidney Crosby walks into a bar. Except its a metal bar like a pole so he gets another concussion.

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What's red and has four letters? A stop sign

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Abortion

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What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

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How do you tell a clown his fly is open? Say sir your fly is open. Then beat him with a pipe until you cant tell what used to be his face.

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How do you make a pool table laugh? You cant it is'nt a living thing which means emotions.

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A kid walks into a bar. He leaves wasted.

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A lion, a tiger, and a bear walk down the side of the road. This is what I observed last week in a suburb of Columbus, Ohio.

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What do a Nazi and a Democrat have in common? They are both members of a highly supported political faction.

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What characterizes a good joke? The lack of a punch line.

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Why'd the cop pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

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Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

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Why did Johnny fall off his bike? His father never taught him how to ride one as he was an abusive alcoholic who abandoned Johnny's mother when Johnny was 3, so he is not very good at riding bikes.

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Why was Jesus Christ white? Because it would be a lot better if I had more confidence in myself...

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What's the difference between an elevator and a Mexican? An elevator helps society

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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