- Anti Joke

Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted better pay.

What's faster than the speed of light? Not a car

Why couldn't the boy write his name because he had no arms.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead

Why did the Democrat cross the road? Because the glorious leader ordered it for all minions

Knock Knock! F*ck off

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Cheese on toes

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was at a crosswalk and had the right of way to on coming traffic

Three dogs are barking at a wall. People walk by thinking "Why are these dogs barking at a wall?".

I have a really good knock knock joke. You start. Knock knock. Open the door see who it is and then slam the door in your face THE END

A fat man orders a pizza. Then after eating it, he gets a eart attack due to his high cholesterol and lack of exercise

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

What worse than a hurt puppy? Two hurt puppies.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

Knock knock. Who's there? The Postman Will you sign hear please he said Oh my toaster came

What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time

Q. How do you know when you've had too much too drink? A. Your dead(No because when your dead you can't think.)

Ding dong Who's there Electricity

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

A man walks into a bar. He asks for a beer. One of the bar tenders twlls him they are all out. He takes out his gun. He has 1 bullet and there are 3 bar tenders. He wants to kill them all. What does he do? A: Shoots 1 and pegs bricks at the other two.

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Who do u talk to when everyone is ignoring you? Nobody will talk to you so what's the point?

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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