why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

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Why did the really unfunny man buy AntiJoke The Book??? It was a good deal and only $9.99.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

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Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

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wanna hear a joke? womans rights

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why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer while the other is just a water melon.

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What's worse than a work in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Seeing the same joke repeated thousands of times on anti-joke.com.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

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what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

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Q: Why are Cats called Lolcat? A: They forgot to put "i" between l & c

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What's the difference between a book and a house? Their names

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

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What happened to the man who grew into the couch? He was surgically removed and forced to exercise daily. He is feeling much better now.

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why did the clown go to the graveyard? because he was dead

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What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

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Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

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knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

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Knock knock! Who's there? Girl Scouts selling cookies! I'm not legally allowed within 500 yards of you. Please get off my property.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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