Two stoners walk into a bar. They didn't drive there because they were high and wanted to enjoy a cool, evening stroll.

Why'd the girl fall off her bike? She rode over a curb

What's small, white, and it killed Bruce Lee? Aspirin.

Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

whats white and black, and red all over, kiren poping jacob cherry

Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

You know what a thief's kid receive on christmas? Your bike!

Do you believe in magic? cuz i do.

Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupter. Interrupter who? Interrupter Jones.

why was the black man on the bus? cause he needed to get to work

WHo owns a white van? JOSH!!

Who didn't allow the gorilla into the ballet studio? Whoever was in charge.

Why would a dog sniff another dog's butt hole? Because that is what they do.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

whats the difference between kroush and a bucket of shit? the bucket

What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

why did little suzy fall off the swing? she was stabbed by a drugaddict

What's worse than finding The Holocaust in your apple? Most things, because that's impossible.

Mary had a little lamb Little lamb Mary had a little lamb That Mary wanted to blow Because Mary was into beastiality

I put the STD in stud now all i need is U

Why is there a rock in a boy's foot? He wasn't weraing shoes.

Why did the duck cross the road? It followed the chicken.

Comes a giraffe on a scooter to the hospital and asks: 'can I have some flour?'.

Fight fire with with fire! That would be impossible, it'd just make the fire bigger. And probably kill you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...