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How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

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How do you kill a beetle? Wait outside his apartment and shoot him

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Why did the boy jump off a cliff Because he was gay and committed suicide

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What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to give it a female name.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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Your mom is so poor that she collect food stamps is on welfare and lives in section 8 housing and cannot find a job that provides her a livable wage

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven they say nothing to eachother because they are muffins and cannot speak if they did they would most likely be taken by the US government and studied and assumed to be alien life forms but anyway the muffins were taken out later and presumably eaten

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Why did the Jew pick up the quarter on the sidewalk? Because he was going to buy a candy bar and was short 25 cents.

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What's white and can't jump? A fridge.

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If you were on an island with one wish what would you wish for? To get off the island

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What do you say when you see a black guy? Hello,how are you today?

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What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

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why did the chicken cross the road because on the other side his wife that he had loved for years was being tortured and he was trying to save her life.

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? gloves.

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A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

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i asked my friend about the holocaust... umm it turns out hes a jew yaaa sorry then i screamed califona fire asin tits then ran

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What's gayer than Justin Beiber? The guy getting a blowjob from him! Kelvin Yang.

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A Haiku It Is This One Is Kind Of Boring Now It's Time For Bed

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Your mum is such a slut, I'd reccomend she seeks psychiatric help, as her deviant promiscuity is clearly a phsical manifestation of some deep rooted psychological disfunction. We all wish her well.

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how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

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Four blondes began their road trip from NYC to Europe and promptly drowned.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

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What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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