Why did the chicken cross the road? He had escaped from his farm and didn't understand the laws of jaywalking.

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Well... My reputation is still kinda exaggerated apparently. What you experienced is called astral projection, some people claim it is the same as lucid dreaming, I beg to differ, the difference is vast. You basically just admitted that people believe much more in you, than you believe in yourself, without believing hypnosis does not work, people are like "bah its just suggestions", its true, but underestimating the power of suggestions is a pretty bad call.

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A Duck, a Mexican guy and Helen Keller walk into a bar. The bartender asks "What do each of you want?" The duck doesn't respond because is is a duck. The Mexican guy doesn't respond because he doesn't know English that well. Helen Keller does't respond because she is dead.

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What did the cannibal say after he ate the clown? I am not sure as the tragic situation occurred while the clown was hiking alone.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

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whats green and lives in the water

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Knock knock whose there alzheimers alzheimers who get in the van

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What did little Timmy get for Christmas after he was diagnosed with leukemia? A gift card to Bed Bath and Beyond because he was interested in redecorating.

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why did the chicken cross the road because on the other side his wife that he had loved for years was being tortured and he was trying to save her life.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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What's twelve inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

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Why did Steve Jobs die? Because he had cancer

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Obama lin Baden.

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How many seals does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Depends on how high the ceiling is.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally murdered 6's entire family.

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Why did the ANTI-JOKE book cry? -It wasn't funny

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What's the richest fish in the sea? The one you threw a quarter at.

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Why couldn't the little seven year old girl paint her finger nails? She fell in front of a train.

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What do you say when you see a black guy? Hello,how are you today?

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Whats a black and white and red all over? i dont know...who spends their time researching this kind of stuff

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his soon to be butchered family.

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Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

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Why is Michael J. Fox so go at dance? Because he took lesson as a child

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How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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