Knock Knock Who is there? *bang* The following story depicts the life and death of Bob:___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________then he opened the door and was shot in the face.

What do you get when you cross a shark and a squid Nothing thats impossible

What's the deal with airline food? Food tastes different on an airplane. The atmosphere dries out your nose, the air pressure numbs 1/3 of your taste buds, and low humidity levels give you cotton mouth. These factors cause the food to taste worse than it normally would.

A duck walks into a bar and says, "Put it on my bill"

what did katness save her Life? because peter hates her and katness is peaches and peter dies in the titanic because it is gay shut up becky

why do elephants paint them selves green ..... to blend into snooker tables. have u ever seen an elephant on a snooker table .... thats just how good they are.

How do you post a Tasmanian devil? Recorded Delivery

a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

A black man and a mexican jump of a building to see who hits the ground first. Who wins? Society.

What has eyes but can't see? Helen Keller. What has ears but can't hear? A field of corn.

Why not zoidburg? Because Zoidburg is a alien from another planet and the human population is probally afraid to talk to him do to the potential danger of alien contact.

charly ate an apple. the apple was filled with poison and charly died.

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? I don't hammer the watermon

how do you get a nun pregnant? have unprotected SEX with her, resulting in expulsion from her convent

Why was girl happy on the day she found out she wasn't pregnant? -It was her birthday.

How many Mexicans can you fit in a Smart car? None. It's too damn small!

Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

What's black and blue and made of poo? A drowning black guy, holding some blue poop

roses are red, violets are blue, dandelions are yellow, tulips are pink, sunflowers are black and yellow, my dick is 13 inches long.

Yo momma's so old, she lives in a nursing home and is on various medications that she needs to take to stay in optimum health.

will you like this joke my sources say no

What does a cookie and the twin towers have in common? They both crumble.

A boy walks into a bar. He wakes up in a hospital 3 days later with a bruise on his head. He asks the doctor, "What happened?" The doctor replies, "The bartender smashed a glass on your forehead."

Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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