A fully grown cow walks into a man's house and says to him, "Hey, how have you been?" Traumatized by the vivid circumstances, the man falls to the floor and begins sobbing relentlessly until he passes out onto the floor from a violent mental breakdown.

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What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

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Hickory Dickory Dock, Three mice ran up the clock, the clock struck 1, and the other 2 escaped with minor injuries

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A bra walks into a dyslexic man.

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Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

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Two clarinets were locked in a case for 20 years. They both play well.

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

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Shltskc gw? G

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

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What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

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Two black guys walk into a bar the bartender says get out

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You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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"Why is Barney purple and green?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way"

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Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

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What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

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What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

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What did the Chinese man say to the Japanese man Nothing as they have never met

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What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with a live one crawling out.

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What do you get when you mix monster, coke, and and seltzer? Kicked out of stop and shop.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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