Knock knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave was beginning to get very scared of his best friend at this time, so he ran away panicking.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

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Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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Showcasing you? Really? I am tired too, yeah its daytime here as well, sleep well then. Hey, by the way, when you where like posting a lot of weird comments, where you trying to impress me?

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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emma brown i did tap that shit -jackson edwards

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What's worse than getting raped by a bear? Getting raped by two bears.

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What do u do to blow off steam? I simply go to the top of the empire states building, poor gasoline in a bag, put a baby in it, light it on fire, and through it off the side. problem?

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was dead. Why'd the other monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was stapled to the dead monkey!

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Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

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What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

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There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

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What did the dog say to the Jewish Rabbi? Bark

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Q:What did the deaf kid say to the blind kid? A: nothing deaf kids can't talk they can only have conversations with their hands,which would be pretty useless at this moment cause the blind kid can't see his hand guestures

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Why did the young boy drop his bus. He was hit by an ice cream.

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When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

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Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

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What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

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What did John name his dog? Doggy

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ken. Can I some and use your toilet, I really need a shit.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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You know why they call me Scuba Steve? Because I Scuba Dive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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