Why wasn't the little boy allowed to get a dog? Because the orphanage he lives at doesn't allow dogs.

Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

1657 is a cool number, when a leprachaun sings it sounds like pie drinking an obese penguin (do you know what I mean....) :D

when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

knock knock who's there? the police, we have a warrant for your arrest.

Why doesn't the man like iced tea? Because he likes it hot.

Why did the Fly die? Cause it died the average life span is 30 days.

'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

whats worse than loseing your dog? getting raped by a clown.

Double-whammy

Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, Jack sat on his candle, and burnt his ass.

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven has an extra penis

3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

blargen fa-diddle nachen!

A man in a wheelchair walked into a bar. No he didn't.

Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

What did the douche bag get for Christmas? Your girlfriend.

Why did suzy not eat her breakfast? because i stapled her to the table.

whats wores than eating a vag. a gaint vag eating you.

kid: dad! a kid called me gay today! dad: son, im 100% ok with u hurting that kid! kid: i cant! hes too cute.

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? All of them.

What did the traffic light say to the car? dont look at me am changing.

An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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