Why didn't Joey play with the other kids on the playground? Answer: He was dead

Q: Why didin't fat billy take the last peace of pie? A: cuz he was not hungry

A man is on a military operation, he dies and has a funeral.

Sarah lost both arms in a car accident Knock knock Who's there? Not sarah. Roses are red Violets are blue Wow. Clever Knock knock Who's there? Still not Sarah, as she is in a serious condition at her local hospital, and so is fighting for her life.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the koala.

Knock Knock. Hello Frank! How'd you know it was me? There is a window next to the door.

A priest, a rabbi, and a muslim cleric walk into a bar. In Syria. Dead children.

How do you fit a giraffe into a refrigerator? You cut it into pieces.

Why did the chicken cross the road So he could get back to the farm and lay more eggs

Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

If quizzes are quizical, what are tests? Testicals

What happened to the boy that got raped? He later died of depression

Its a bird!! Its a plane!! No, its a bird.

Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

How did the man lose his arm? beacuse of the five year old with a knife obsesion standing right beind you at this minute...

Two guys walk into a bar.... OUCH

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

Why did Suzie fall off the Swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

I like my coffee like my women, without a penis

How do you say hooker in Chinese? ?

Three men were on a plane. Oh wait. You probably already heard this one.

A rabbi and a priest walk into a supermarket... They buy food, put in their cars, drive home and cook dinner.

knock knock whos there **gunshot ...man that gun show next door is annoying

How do Chinese people name their kids? They could look up a baby-names book, consult their family history, or make one up

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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