You're so ugly, when yo' mama dropped you off at school, she kissed your forehead and called you beautiful.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A bar walked into a bar. Bars can't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why was the man shot in the head twice? He wasn't because he died after the first and it is nearly impossible to survive a gunshot to the head.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What would Jesus say if he was alive today? “Nehwê tzevjânach aikâna d'bwaschmâja af b'arha.”

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it? Nothing, scientific research has shown over thousands of years that grapes cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse does not say anything because its a horse and horses cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? A gameboy

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what did Harold Camping say to the little girl and boy? "You and your parents are going to die today"

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I can't hear you. I have carrots in my ears.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q: knok knok A: Im home

thumb_up thumb_down -20

how many drunk drivers does it take to drive home one and only one, if more than one drunk driver tried to drive home at the same time in the same car they would surely crash and not make it home.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q:Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? A: Neither did she

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why was the little girl crying? Because she was hanging upside down from an oak tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

CJTheBEST Sticks and stones, May break my bones, Because i have osteoperosis

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A white horse walks into a bar and orders a bitter. The bartender says "Hey, do you know we've got a drink named after you?" The horse says; "Eeek! A talking cow."

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q: Why did the kid get Christman presents in August? A: Because it was cheaper than chemotherapy.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Chuck Norris once stared in a show called Walker: Texas Ranger.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Guess what Timmy got for Christmas, Nothing, Timmy has no parents, he's an orphan.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Even though I can't tell Because I am color blind

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what's the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? dolphins aren't ghosts!!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A man walks into a bar. His family has died in a tragic accident and he is trying to drink down the pain.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why was it really gross when the blonde dove into the swimming pool? Because the swimming pool was full of phlegm!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What really killed the dinosaurs? ME!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops