Roses are red, Violets are violet.

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:( You are right Nero, I am terribly sorry, when I see you, I see the brightest man I have ever seen, should you ever turn against me and stop underestimating yourself, there is nothing I could do.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar? Actually it's my cookie jar, and my cookies. I stole nothing.

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what do you call balls on richards chin? a dick in his mouth

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What happens when a unicorn gets her period? You know it's a girl.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

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I saw GESUS and SHE's BLACK

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I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather did. Not screaming in terror like the rest of te people in his car.

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Did you hear about the blind man who got stuck by a bus? Poor guy never saw it coming.

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What did the man say when he saw his t.v. floating in the middle of the night? I must be seeing things. By logic, televisions don't float. My weary eyes must be playing tricks on me and I should probably go back to sleep.

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A man commands his dog to sit. However, his dog is poorly trained, so does not.

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How do you make a man cry? you torture him

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Why did the black guy get hit by a banana He was low on potassium and his friend threw the banana too hard

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An Asian walks into a bar and says, "1???????????"

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Once upon a time a was born

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When did the ball-room finally close? Closing time.

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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Q: What did the serail rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

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What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

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What's worse than a worm in your apple That one time I rapped and killed your mom, oh and happy birthday prick

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? "Justin Bieber" And you let him in because he's a young talented singer.

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Why did the man get a penis Becuse he was gay Add on He died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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