Why didn't the little girl show up for school? Because she was dead.

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How much weight can an ant carry up a mole hill? Ice cream has no bones.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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How do you kill a turtle? You can't, it has a shell for a reason.

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whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

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What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

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roses are red violets are microwaves i have amnesia what ma name iiizzz 'SHAWTAY

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i get tired of this shit let's have some grey goose

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Nero, sure you are okay?

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What's black an white and red all over? Two dead babies, one African American and one Caucasian split in half by a chainsaw.

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What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

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What is the key to a good anti-joke? A disappointing or intellectual punch-line said in a calm and passive tone.

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Why was the bartender's baby crying upstairs? Because it was being raped.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Still the Holocaust

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Yo mumma so poor that she dosent have any money

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Roses are blue, Violets are purple, I like chicken. Do you like chicken?

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What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

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What's a fry cook's favorite day? Saturday. It's his day off.

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What does china and an 80 year old body builder have in common? They're both asian. I forgot to mention that the body builder is japanese.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the little girl only walk half way across the street She fell into a man hole and died

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whats hairy and crys your mom

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What did the man do with the naked baby girl? He put some clothes on her and proceded to lay her down for a nap.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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