How do you know when a blonde has been using your computer? If you're lucky some of his or hair will have fallen out and be left on the keyboard as evidence.

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american idol

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What's 2+2? Gonorrhea

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What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

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why was the fork in the wall? Why would a fork be in a wall?

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You wanna hear a joke? People that debase womens' rights.

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A plane filled with English tourists is on it's way from Holland to Spain. It crashes in France. Where are the surviors buried? Survivors aren't buried.

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Why was the baby crying? Because it was on fire.

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Whats red, black and brown? My anus after a Friday night

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Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

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What's just not right? Left

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to form the basis of an extremly popular jokewhich would grace the schoolyards around the world for centurys to come!

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What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

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1657 is a cool number, when a leprachaun sings it sounds like pie drinking an obese penguin (do you know what I mean....) :D

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What did one alien say to another alien? I miss Mexico.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a tire iron? I've never forcibly expelled three tire irons from my vagina.

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Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

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Why wasn't the little boy allowed to get a dog? Because the orphanage he lives at doesn't allow dogs.

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An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops