How do you catch a predator? You throw a beartrap at a child.

Who would win, Chuck Norris or a T-Rex? The T-Rex, Chuck Norris would get ripped apart like any other human-being.

A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

Lol, she does not think anything, she knows. Its not unfaithfulness if you ask for permission and are granted so because the trust is strong and mutual.

Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

why couldnt the little boy watch two and a half men? because charlie sheen left and the other guy had surgeery and now has 2 penises

Whats funnier than watching the kid next to you on the computer? Nothing because he is still trying to figure out that i unplugged his mouse!

A man dressed as a woman gets hit in the nuts they fall to the ground in pain

womans having rights.

Whats better then free candy from a guy in a van? Trying to find his lost puppy so his kids don't cry.

Your mother is so retarded. How retarded is she? Very retarded.

How do you get an annoying baby to shut up? Hit it with a bat

Why did Maggie shit herself? Because she saw her son.

What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Doesn't matter. He was hit by a semi truck.

An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

Diarrhea

Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...