why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the house. knock knock. who's there? the chicken!

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THe Election

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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who is really lanky? james cornish

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

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Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

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What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

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What do you call a bunch of Cubans on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico? A guy who just so happens to own a boat and is on a fishing trip with his buddies. -Mitch Hastings

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What did Jay Z say to his long lost friends? Allow me to reintroduce myself, my names Jay - Z

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What do call a black politician? Not Barack Obama, unless it's Barack Obama

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How long does it take for a black woman to have a shit. 9 months.

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whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

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How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

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Whats the difference between a penis and a vagina? Pancakes,

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Rose are brown, Violets are brown, Who keeps pooping in my garden?

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

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CAOIMHIN JUST BE QUITE

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Knock knock Who's there A gorilla A gorilla who? A gorilla is a ground-dwelling, predominantly herbivorous ape that inhabit the forests of central Africa. The eponymous genus Gorilla is divided into two species: the eastern gorillas and the western gorillas, and either four or five subspecies. They are the largest living primates by physical size. The DNA of gorillas is highly similar to that of humans, from 95–99% depending on what is counted, and they are the next closest living relatives to humans after the chimpanzees and bonobos.

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What did the black man say tovtye chinese man? Hello sir how are you today?

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Knock Knock. Who's there? You Know. You Know who?.......GOODBYE!

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What did George Washington tell his men before they got on their horses? Men get on your horses.

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What look likes a rocket, uses Mc Donalds wifi and takes off from Fairlawns Avenue Kevins House not instigating it was all Taggart

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops