Knock knock! Just kidding.

Why'd the kid stick ice up his nose? To keep his lunch cold.

Why is my penis rainbow colored?

What do you call it when a black man kills an Asian man? Murder.

What do you get when you cross a computer with a whore? A:porn

Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

What's the difference between the WNBA and the NBA? The WNBA features female athletes, as oppose to the males of the NBA.

Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up on its own? The kickstand was broken and the child whom of which owned the bicycle no longer had the need for training wheels.

Q: What did the homeless man get on his Birthday? A: Hypothermia.

What's the opposite of a joke? An anti-joke. You're reading one right now.

What did modern scientists say to Einstein? Neurtinos travel faster than the speed of light! :)

why did the boy drop his bus because he was hit by an ice cream

A black man and a Mexican were in a car. Who was driving? The cop.

how did the woman get her baby to stop crying? she hit him with a axe

What sound does a dog make? WOOF What sound does a cat make? MEOW What sound does a giraffe make? ...

In Soviet Russia, you wouldn't have a likely chance of surviving because of Stalin's mass paranoia and total neglect for his fellow man.

roses are red grass is greener get in the bed and suck on my wiener

A kid comes across an injured duck near a lake. Nevermind he doesn't see it he's really high.

Why did the chicken cross the dairy farm? Sex.

Two lions are walking down the street. One lion says to the other, "where is everybody?"

Q. bob had 93 chocolate bars and ate 74 what does he have now? A. diabetes

So this drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later she has a misscarrage

What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

What do you call an elephant in a phone booth? Stuck

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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