Whats better then free candy from a guy in a van? Trying to find his lost puppy so his kids don't cry.

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Lol, she does not think anything, she knows. Its not unfaithfulness if you ask for permission and are granted so because the trust is strong and mutual.

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Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

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What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

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There's a black and a mexican guy in a car. Who's driving? The chauffeur.

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Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

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A man dressed as a woman gets hit in the nuts they fall to the ground in pain

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How do you catch a predator? You throw a beartrap at a child.

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How do you get an annoying baby to shut up? Hit it with a bat

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School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

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Why did the bunny hit the drum? It didn't because it did not have the mental capacity or physical capabilities to do so

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An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

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womans having rights.

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some dude: weed is bad Other dude: then why do they prescribe it to people are you dumb or are you stupid

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Diarrhea

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If you eat a brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundae, your tastebuds will likely turn purple and move to France, where people don't eat brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundaes.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

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Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

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A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

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Why did Maggie shit herself? Because she saw her son.

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Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

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How is an elephant like a grape? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

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A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

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Your mother is so retarded. How retarded is she? Very retarded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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