Why did Jim get hit by a train? Because he was standing in the tracks.

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Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

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What has Whitney Houston got in common with a spider? They're both black and they can't get out of the bathtub

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what's the difference between a virginia, and steve keen? a virginia is,nt a knob

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What were the pilots' of Malaysia Airlines Missing plane favourite programs? Lost...

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Why did the boy die of Cancer? Because I took some radioactive chemicals and hen I feel like it I beat him with it.

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Two blondes walks into a tavern, which is kind of funny, since the second one should have seen it.

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What did the starving african child get for his birthday Ebola

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What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

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What did the whale do when he was angry? He beached himself, causing a major ecological disaster and costing the beach community thousands of dollars to return him to the water.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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Your momma is so fat, her doctor recommended exercising more and eating healthier.

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Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

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Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree? No

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist bastard..

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Why did the chicken cross the road? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - I lied, it was a goat.

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whats worse than dieing in an airplane? jumping out of the airplane to save yourself and emediatly getting shredded by the massive engine you did not have the wits to see.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

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A Christian, a Sunni Muslim, and a Shi'a Muslim walked into a government building. Turns out, they were Lebanese, so this was a normal occurrence. Thus, to draw any humor from it before first taking into account the weaknesses of your own government would be both unwise and unfair.

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what did the homeless man get for Christmas? nothing.

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have you seen hellen kellers new treehouse? no well neither has she

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A cat ran into the road...I hit it

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Charlie, Charlie the drunk guinea pig! OUR BEST FRIEND!!! Angel Charlie: I'm already dead yah poof!!! Butt cancer killed me.....

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What did the retarded kid get for chrismas? Nothing the orphanage could not afford to give presents to all of the retarded children

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops