Why was the kid dizzy? He ran in a circle repeatedly.

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How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

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What's funny about your mom? Nothing, she died three weeks ago.

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ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE HERE'S A KNIFE KILL YOURSELF KANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why'd the littler girl fall of the swing? because a drunk driver ran through the swing, the little girl was killed. he was later charged with manslaughter.

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Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

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Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

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Q: Why shouldn't you walk under a ladder? A: Because it could fall on top of you. Be a reasonable human being and just fly OVER the ladder.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

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Yo momma's so poor, she needs to work 2 jobs to support her family.

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Hi, how are you doing? Good, yourself? Fine, thanks. Have a nice day. You too, bye.

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i like punching orphans in the face, you wanna know why? what are they gonna do? tell their parents???

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Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the ground

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Yo mama so short she often has to ask you to retrieve items from the top shelf of her cabinet.

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What's black and white and nailed to the floor? A skunk that's nailed to the floor.

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John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

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What does a Cuban do when he gets a flat tire? He pulls over and replaces it.

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You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

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what is worse than finding finding an apple in your worm? Finding your peanut shells in your peanut.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was stressed & having alot of financial, mental and physical problems so he crossed the road in hope to kill himself. And he did he got ran over by a car, may his soul rest in peace.

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Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

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What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops