A man has a parrot who repeats everything the man says. He constantly complains about his mother-in-law and everytime he says her name it follows with the word bitch. One day she makes a suprise visit and he greets her with a "Oh hello Doris" , he looks in horror to see if the parrot will call her a bitch but instead finds the parrot dead because he forgot to feed it for 4 days.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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what do you call a gay ginger boy ? Ronan.

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a blind person walks into a deaf person and the deaf person says "dadadader"

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Whats bent but straight for danielle? Joseph Plummer

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Why did Hitler Kill his self Answer- He got a gas bill By Lewis

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Knock Knock Who's there? Immigration. You're headed back to mexico.

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Q. What did the gay kid say to his group of straights? A. 10 dollars to the first one to tip over that little asian boy on the bike.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? The one at the bottom is alive. What's worse than that? He's eating his way out. What's worse than that? He came back for seconds.

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What did the sheriff call the death of a black man who was shot 14 times? -The worst case of suicide he'd ever seen.

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What do you call a growing family of micro-organisms? Cancer

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What's worse than Monkey Ball? Super Monkey Ball. What's worse than Super Monkey Ball? The Holocaust.

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Whats a blind catholics biggest fear? The priests power of chris compelling him

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An american, a french and a japanese walk into a bar. They are colleagues from the International University of Florida, used to go out together.

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Q: Why was the old man sad? A: Because he has a quarter super glued to the bottom of his foot

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A gay man watches football.

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My dad weights 350 lbs. He decided to switch to diet soda.

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A jew walks into a church. he wishes to be touched by God.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I look down My pants are brown.

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How do you kill a Chinese hobo Shoot him

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A small child walks past a man on the street: Fortunately, as the man hates children he is perfect height to let a massive fart rip in his face on the way past. His mum looks disgusted. They carry on with their day.

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Q: What's worse than a worm in you're apple... A: The fact that you have all-timers and can't remember...

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Joke below was made by Daniel Textor, he's a d i c k.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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