Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Whose there? Obviously not Suzie.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A paraplegic walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

two flowers in a meddow recently bloomed a cow came over and ate them, and the cow died of herpes the next day

thumb_up thumb_down +16

I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

thumb_up thumb_down +16

You wanna hear what's totally out of this world? The moon

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you fit 10 babies in a bowl? With a blender. How do you get them out of the bowl? You don't, you've already been arrested for multiple cases of infanticide.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? Four because snakes have no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

drugs.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

thumb_up thumb_down +16

I was going to tell a joke about your mom's vagina, but that's overused.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Did you know Helen Keller had a playground in her backyard? Neither did she

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the orange say to the lemon? "Hello"

thumb_up thumb_down +16

If life throws you lemons, you might be dislexic

thumb_up thumb_down +16

If life throws you lemons, what do you do? Well unless life throws you water and sugar also, hen your lemonade is gonna taste horrible.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

catastrophic anthropogenic global warming

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Blonde: Where's the ice? Asian: In the freezer.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Jon waits in his driveway for a bit then rides off to a lemonade stand but doesn't stop because the stand is surrounded by police who have arrested the kids at the stand for selling spiked lemonade. He continues past the stand and goes somewhere else (probably Subway).

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree??? Because it was dead.....

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops