what has wheels and runs on gas? a car with feet

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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Why do cows say moo? Because it's a cow

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong WALKS on the moon. Michael Jackson rapes little boys

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Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? Who me? Couldn't be.

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A Jew walks into a bar. He immediately turns around and walks out because prices at this particular high end bar are much too high for his liking.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ed. Ed who? Ed Begley Jr.

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My Japanese girlfriend dumped me today...Oh well, theres plenty more in the sea

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What would you call Shaquille O'Neal if he was on the moon? Shaquille O'Neal, or any nickname you may have for him.

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Getting shot.

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What's under the first mate? The second mate.

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What do u call Lindsay Lohan fall from grace? Probably likely tragic and is also a very useful metaphor for The USA's projected path for global and economic superiority.

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Teacher- Pick the odd one out- Man, whale, bat, squirrel, frog Student- Whale. All others are found in Nebraska

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your mother is so fat, she possesses her own orbit

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I want some pudding. but I didn't have my meat. how can I have pudding?

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A women frantically calls the doctor and says, " Doctor, doctor, give me the news! I have a bad case of loving you."

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hashtags suck balls

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so a man walks into a bar and Cancer

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What's worse than getting murdered? Getting murdered twice? - Louis

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart. I am still waiting for a transplant.....

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I'm not racist. Racism is a crime, and crime is for black people.

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What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? (Because she was blind and deaf?) No, because she was a woman.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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