A man runs into a bar and yells "Ow!!" He is hospitalized due to severe trauma to the head and spine.

The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.

How do you tell identical twins apart? You can't. They look identical.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Scientists are still unable to fully understand the brain functioning of chickens enough to comprehend their motives for doing such a thing.

How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

A blond, a brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They all die of starvation.

Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

on a scale from 0 to 100, how childish are you? 69

What glows in the dark and is really annoying? A glow in the dark chimpanzee

So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

What did the star say to the asteroid? Nothing, astral bodies can't talk, you dipshit.

Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

What shouldn't you say to a dementia patient? You already said that.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a mountainous mound of slain human offspring? There is none, the second is conferred to the subject of a conversation using a highly advanced vernacular.

An aspiring lawyer walks into a Bar. He will find out if he passed in a few months.

What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

What's Brown and Sticky? A Stick

The chicken didn't cross the road. Therefor, there is no why.

roses are red violets are blue maskrosor are gula

drugs.

Why do people waste time reading these jokes. Because they like anti jokes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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