(A man goes to visit his neighbor) Knock! Knock! ...................... ................... ................ ............ he walks back home

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Why do bears go to school on Sunday's? They don't, bears don't go to school.

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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What happens if you an 3ft size olive, a glob of red paint and rainbow colored glue on a table and rub your arm in it? You get olive, red paint and glue on your arm.

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What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

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what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his mother at the hospital who is dying of cancer.

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A guy walks into a bar. He goes to the hospital with a severe head injury and dies.

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Two biscuits were sitting in an oven. One says to the other hows it going, the other says nothing because he knows that biscuits can't talk.

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What do you call someone who kills a black man? A murderer

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Does Anti-Joke have a purpose?

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There once was a man from Nantucket He decided to sail to Portland Now he lives in Portland.

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I walked into a Mcdonald's and ordered a Big Mac. I regretted it later.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? "Justin Bieber" And you let him in because he's a young talented singer.

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Why is purple the best color. Cuz icecream has no bones

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What do u call a dumb Asian. An american

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Why did the pregnant Mexican cross the border? Nobody knows. She was shot down on site.

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Sam murray got home after school one day, he siad hello to his father and possibly played some Avatar on the D.S

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For Chuck Norris every street is one way his way.

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Anti-Joke is a sticky wicket.

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If a hen lays an egg in the middle of a roof, which way would it fall? To the east, as there was a brisk wind in that direction.

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What did the millionaire say to the hobo? Hi there.

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The saying "When Pigs Fly" Can easily be canceled. Just tie a rocket and wings to it and let it go.

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whats red and green and has 8 wheels. a stick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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