Why did I lose a card game to a cat? Cause he was a cheetah!

How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

What do Michael Jordan and Michael Jackson have in common? The same first name.

You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

A turtle walks into a bar. The bar tender says "what will it be?" the turtle doesnt reply because its a turtle and the bar tender is sent to a mental hospital for talking to turtles.

Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

I started writing poetry the other day: POETR That's coming along nicely.

if you are reading this your wasting your time

one time, there was this anti-joke.com joke set-up. It was just like a normal joke set-up. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

How did the clown crash his car? A horrible tornado chrashed through the town.

What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre.

What did the farmer say when the potatoes were ready for harvest? The potatoes are ready for harvest.

"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

Many people dont know this about me, but I'm not very famous.

wanna hear a joke? womans rights

What's the difference between Tom and Jerry? One is a cat, and the other is a mouse.

What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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