What happens when you shoot someone? They die.

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what did Tim do when he got married? He kissed the bride Mecheoo LOVES ASS

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What does a black kid get from Christmas? a blunt

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Your momma's so stupid, she has a lower than average IQ!

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what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies?

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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb? NONE A YO F******G BUSINESS!!!

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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what do you call an anoying ginger? jimmy overby

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What do you call a Jew with 20 Pounds of Pennies? A rich man

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I'd love to submit an anti joke, but unfortunatley I don't own a computer.

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Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

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Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

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Why do all asians all look alike? Because they do.

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Ask me if I'm a human. Are you a human? Yes.

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What starts with S and end in H-I-T? shit.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Banana Oh good I thought you wouldn't make it.

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

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why didnt the guy go to work one morning he died in a car accident

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What is brown, creamy, and tastes like gravy? gravy.

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So you're flying around in your bathtub, how pancakes to shingle a doghouse? Airhockey, because pizza bagels can't cry.

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Hi welcome to yack in da box, can i hell you? Yes, could i have a jumbo jack? Jew wanna yumbo yack? Yes.

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What is worse than throwing your baby in the river? Letting Moses out of Egypt

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Why was the giant centipede full? Because it just ate half a dozen purebred golden retriever puppies by hiding all day in the poopy newspapers and emerging at night to eat the defenseless baby dogs in their sleep. BUM BUM BUM KSSSH!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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