She Explored My Body, Licked, Sucked, Swallowed! When Satisfied, She Left! . . . . Damn Mosquito!!!

Why'd the asian man cross the road? I dont know, who cares? Just leave the guy alone

What's small and doesn't turn girls on? A bottlecap.

Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no? sense Microwave

Why did the chicken have a sore neck? Because the farmer cut the chicken's head off, and the body ran around for three minutes until it finally bled to death.

What did the boob say to the bra? sup bra

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it!

Where do you8 find a dog with no legs? right where you left it

Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

A blonde, a brunette and a red head are having a discussion on current issues. The brunette says she would like to see improvements in the environment. The red head says she would like to see the economy prosper. The blonde says she has to take a poop.

What did one lawyer say to the other? Hello

Do you know why one side of the V formation that geese fly in is longer than the other? Because there's more geese on that side.

So a guy with alsimers walks into a bar........I forget the rest.

Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

Why couldn't little sally swim? Because she had weights on her ankles.

Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

Cripples are lame.

What's slippery when wet? A wet slipper.

Why did the President fall down? He was assassinated. -mattobrado

Did you hear about the Mexican boy scout that helped that old lady cross the border.

What does it mean when your dog goes to the bathroom on your floor? He hasn't been very well potty trained By: robobob123

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

Why arent guys and girls the same? Cause there different

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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