Flowers are colors Love me

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A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being molested by a giant octopus.

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Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

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Racial equality.

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. The rabbi says "ow my head"

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What did the cat say to the chicken? Meow

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a guy went to a bar and ordered a molotov cocktail. he died.

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Q: What's blue and smells like grass? A: Blue grass.

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Why did a girl get an STD? She had sex.

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What's sad about Justin bieber getting thrown off of a cliff Nothing

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Roses are red Violets are red I'm bleeding quite profusely and should probably go to the hospital.

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What have you got there? Hitler's gas bill... Oh.. don't show him that, he'll be furious Whys that? He can't read.

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why was six afraid of seven? prison changes a person

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Q. Why did the television set turn on? A. Because someone pressed the power button.

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If life's a box of chocolates, I'm the dominant male.

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What do you get when you cross a dog with an anteater? An animal unlikely to survive beyond infancy.

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Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

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I met her back in the 80s when she was a man.

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Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

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Knock Knock? Whos there? Not Madeleine McCann.

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roses are red, violets are red, ive been shot in the eye with a pelet gun, please ,please help

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YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

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Why didn't Superman save the people from 9/11? Because he was a quadriplegic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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