Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I didn't use protection So here's your baby

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Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

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What's worse than a bug in your soup? Getting shot in the stomach.

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Q. have you seen Helen Keller house A. niether has she

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What do you call cheese that you don't own? Cheese.

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A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

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What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

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Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt says thanks.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

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Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

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Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

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A blonde, a redhead and a brunette were on an island. There were loads of other people too - the UK is a pretty popular place to live.

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Where did the paralytic go for a vacation? No where he can't move.

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What do you call a black man reading a book? An avid reader that happens to be black

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Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

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Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

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a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

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Why was the Asian terrible at driving? He was drunk.

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What happens when you lay a diamond in the water for two hours? It gets wet.

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Why did the Black man cross the road? To get to Pop-Eye's since KFC is too expensive nowadays. HELL-YA

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What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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