How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Hurr durr, I shit my pants.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the mushroom go to the party? Cause he was invited.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

The number 69 is? Just a plain old number that has just as much meaning as 68 and 70.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Did you hear the one about the nascar driver who couldn't pass his road test? No. It's true, he couldn't pass his road test.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

WOMENS RIGHTS

thumb_up thumb_down +11

These jokes don't have punchlines.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck could chuck as much wood as a wood chuck would if a wood chuck could chuck wood.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A black man walks into a bar and he orders a margarita. The bartender says that the margaritas are exceptionally delicious in this bar. He was right.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the red apple say when it saw a black man an irish man, and an asian walk into a bar? nothing apples cant talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Bitch

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what is long, white, and used almost everywhere? there are a lot of things that fit this description, so it would be highly illogical to make a guess.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: Why were there four married men in one room without their pants on? A: because it was the mens bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually, 6's fear was totally irrational, and thus unexplainable. This sort of fear is generally referred to as a phobia.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

whats black and white and red all over? this joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: Why did Suzie fall out the swings? A: She had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.....

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops