If pro- is good or favored and con- is bad, then why do people favor the constitution and stay away from prostitution?

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

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Your Mother is so ugly that men tend to avoid her.

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Me: Hey frank, wanna die? Frank: No, why? Me: (Kills Frank) Frank: Dude why did you kill Frank?

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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But that just reinforces the negative stereotype that women don't have penises.

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What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

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Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of African decent to sit in towards the front of the bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of European decent.

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What did Sally want for Christmas? Nothing, she is Jewish.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Why do the following sentences never have anything to do with the roses and violets?

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I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

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If life gives you lemons, you're setting up a bad joke

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Parkinsons, ;oshgfs;jgbRHG

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i went to the bar. soon after i entered the bar i got kicked out. why? becuase i'm seventeen.

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How do u know what a ass is. You no once you meet adam mac.

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Jimmy: Knock Knock Nick: Whose there? Jimmy: Joe Nick: Joe Who? Jimmy: Joe Mamma Nick: No shes dead.

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Jon waits in his driveway for a bit then rides off to a lemonade stand but doesn't stop because the stand is surrounded by police who have arrested the kids at the stand for selling spiked lemonade. He continues past the stand and goes somewhere else (probably Subway).

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whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

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If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound? It depends on how sound is defined

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What's green fury has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you. A pool-table

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What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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