What isyellow and can't swim? a bulldozer

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Fact: Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people one will always disagree with the other nine.

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Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Certainly not Jimmy.

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Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Mary.

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Yo mama's so fat that she needs substantially larger clothes than most other people

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What's black, white, and red all over? Something that's black, white, and red all over.

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there's a worm in my lime at least it doesn't have scurvy

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How many dead babies can you fit in a tire? It depends on the size of the tire.

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on a scale from voldemort to nigel thornberry, how big is your penis?

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Why did the guy go to the store? He really doesn't want you to know every detail of his life.

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Whats the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? The Porsche isn't in my garage

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Knock knock! who's there? Doctor Doctor who? No, this is your actual doctor, you have cancer.

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What is the difference between john madsen and a gay person. There isn't because john is gay

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What did the fat girl mean when she said, " last night was amaziing?" that pizza pie you shared was very well crafted and baked

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Q. What is worse than a worm in your apple? A. Hitler

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A Jewish man gets on a train. He sits down and a hour and a half later he is dropped of at his proper destination.

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I have a very serious problem with my narcolepsy. I occasionalolahdf;honainbirgnipqgierngiaqbhgpqruiph

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What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

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Whats circular and black? a black circle.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He did it for fitness.

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Why did the guy lose the race? Because he had explosive diarrhea

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was simply wandering around and happened to walk from one side of the road to the other.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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A guy said a racist joke and he got beat up now he is in the hospital for what he said.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops