What do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? A Cog

Why did the asian lady buy the large shirt instead of the medium? Because the medium didn't fit

Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i know where you live now I'm coming for you

Why did little Billy not eat all his carrots? He does not care about his vision.

Your mamma's so dumb, she's had problems functioning in society, due to illiteracy problems, and a general incomprehension of her surroundings and own thoughts.

Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

What did the black guy say when after he jumped in the pool? Wow, its kinda chilly.

Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

Q: Why did the child fall? A: Because I shot him in the leg.

How dou you find the population of mexico? Take a census....... By throwing a dime in the street!

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

What do you call a dragon with no wings? a dragon with no wings :(

Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

Why did the rabbit cross the road? He was attempting vehicular suicide after being told yet again that he was "silly" and "Trix are for kids."

why was six afraid of seven? prison changes a person

So there's a black man riding a bike down the street. A police officer pulls him over to tell him that his back tire seems to be flat. The black man says thank you, and continued riding his bike. Later, he would repair his tire.

What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

what do you call a white man who appears to be standing on water? a surfer

What happened when the man turned on his TV? It was tuned to the Discovery Channel

A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You take a survey of all citizens that live in the country of Mexico, find the wealth of each individual person, and whoever has the most money is the richest person in Mexico.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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