How do you tickle a tree? you dont you are a schizo stop kicking leaves

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i asked my friend about the holocaust... umm it turns out hes a jew yaaa sorry then i screamed califona fire asin tits then ran

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

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what did batman say to robin to get him into the car? Get in the car

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Why is bobsledding the coolest sport? Because this is my subjective opinion.

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What is the difference between john madsen and a gay person. There isn't because john is gay

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Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

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Q: What did the police officer tell the man without a shirt on? A: Put a shirt on.

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling rap music, watermelons, grape soda and fried chicken? A poor business model

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What did robin say to batman before they got I the car........ Get in the car.

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Q: Where does Cher sit? A: I have no idea.

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what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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How many people are in the world? More than one. -David Papile

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There are two types of people in this world, those that can't count

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My zombie busting team: Tank: The Terminator Mechanic: Tony Stark Demolitions: Superman Medic: Gandalf Bait: Justin Bieber

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A pretty funny pick-up line that probably doesn't work: "Hey, do you work at Little Caesar's? Because you're hot and I'm ready.

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What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

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Whats the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? The Porsche isn't in my garage

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Do you know what the worst part about inbreeding is? - It's runs in the family!

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A horse and a penguin and a kangaroo come into a bar and order drinks from the bartender, who later gets fired for taking acid while working.

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What did goldilocks say to the three bears? she was savagely murdered before she could say anything.

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What's twelve inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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