What does Chuck Norris order at a coffee shop? Coffee.

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What would George Washington do if he was able to talk to all of America? Ask them to dig him up.

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How do you make a baby not cry? Do not throw a brick at it. ANTI-JOKE

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? It was my car.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face

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What happened when the Asian girl got a B on her report card? She committed suicide

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. You are a prostitute. I have a dollar.

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What do you call a black man with pantyhose on his head. A white guy in the dark with black pantyhose on his head

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Your parents shouldn't have met. I was thinking that as I contemplated suicide.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have five fingers The third one's for you

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock, knock Who's there? Not Susie

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Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

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Knock Knock Whos there Boo OWWW YOU ASS WAT THE F*%^ (crying)

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Q:Why did the man fall down the stairs? A:Because someone pushed him down.

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your mom is so fat that she had to start going to a gym to exercise and get her weight under control.

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A man walks into a bar and orders four shots. Before the bartender asks "If it really is that bad of a day". The man says "Yea I need this shit". The next day the bar is overwhelmed with police and investigators. The bartender had emptied a revolver in the tired business man's face and vanished.

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What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

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Your sex life.

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Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didnt. Why do we have to live in a world where people have to be so concered about why a stupid chicken decides to cross a road. Shouldnt we all be more focused on ways to get a better economy, or maybe end world hunger?

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A child walks into a bar. I swear those jungle gyms are too short.

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Why was 7 afraid of 8? Because 8-9-10.

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Why did the cop pull over a black guy? The man was breaking the law by going 82 mph in a 70 mph zone, which resulted in a 100 doller fine. Oh and the cop was a racist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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