How many policemen does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they just beat up the room for being black

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a supermarket... They buy food, put in their cars, drive home and cook dinner.

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If I was in a room with Osama bin laden and george bush, and my friend. And I had a gun with two bullets, I'd shoot my friend twice.

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Two muffins are in the oven They didn't say anything.

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Like this if you want people to stop asking to have their jokes liked.

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How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

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In soviet Russia, your dead because it doesn't exist anymore

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Why did old Mary fall off the cliff? There were no brakes on her wheelchair

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What do you call a deer in the wild? a deer

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So three men walk into a bar and buy a round of drinks for everyone. As they do this, three kenyans die of dehydration while their families weep at their feet.

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roses are red, violets are blue, Hitler killed 6.6 million jews.

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what do u call a dumbass phone cia cias phone

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Why did the boy get coal in his stalking. Cause he wants to be a geologist and that's what he asked for.

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Whats fluffy, multicolored, and dances like a disco santaclaus? i don't know.

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I heard a joke one time about a Rabbi, a Priest, and a little boy. It wasn't funny.

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You know who else sucks dick? My aunt Jane. She was forced to become a prostitute after she got fired from her job.

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What's worse than the WNBA? The Cleveland Cavaliers.

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what did the boy say to his mum when he got home from school nothing he has no tongue

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Whats worse than your house on fire? an orphanage catching on fire. Whats wosre than an orphanage catching on fire? A bunny farm catching on fire.

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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Why did the student have a staring contest with his teacher? Well, the teacher was actually unaware of the competition.

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What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing becasue a mute is a person who cannot speak and a deaf man ould not hear the jumbled mumblings anyway.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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