How many Jews does it take to bake a turkey using an oven, I don't know but it only takes one Jew to stuff one.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the dog say to the other dog? Ruff, hi, ruff ruff, we are both dogs ruff ruff, ruff ruff, ruff!!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

yo mama's so dumb, she had to retake the 11th grade.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Scrooge McDuck dives headfirst into his pool of gold coins... He breaks his neck from the impact of the landing and dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Hey I Just Met You , And This is Crazy But Don't Text. My Phone Cuz You Stalk Me Daily #Taste_MyCarmel

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the black man quit his job as a rapper? Because he was an admirable father and husband and was willing to sacrifice his passion to provide for those he loved.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist bastard..

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Doctor: Knock knock. Patient: Whose there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor. Patient: Interrupting doc... Doctor: Your son has AIDS and will die soon.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

roses are red violets are blue i fucked your mom so did you

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why don't jews believe in Jesus Because jews believe Jesus Christ was not their savior

thumb_up thumb_down -17

kieran is a homosexual

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why do black people have white palms? Genetics.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the difference between a duck and male black prostitute? The duck is says quack

thumb_up thumb_down -17

a grasshopper walks into a bar the bartender says hey we have a drink named after you the grasshopper says what dave?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I banged your mom so hard that she got a urinary tract infection.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Did you hear about the monkey in the tree? Oh no wait. It was a lizard.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferarri? I don't have a ferarri in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: Why did the kid get Christman presents in August? A: Because it was cheaper than chemotherapy.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops