Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

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The boy said to the priest, may God be with you. The priest responded with, "And also IN you".

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One time there was a guy who jumped off a bridge and died

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

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What is the difference between john madsen and a gay person. There isn't because john is gay

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How do you get rid of herpes? You shoot up the cancer ward of a hospital.

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Why did the black guy not like oreos? because he is a very health concious person and knowes that too much of a bad thing can make you fat.

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Q: How many licks does it take to the center of a tootsie pop? A: At least one.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Henry threw it well.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

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Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

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why can't dead peaple have sex? because they're dead.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

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roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

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what do a toothbrush and an ice maker have in common? ....They're both in your house.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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How many plumbers does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Plumbers don't do that. Electricians do.

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http://media.photobucket.com/image/whale%20penis/marcus1v0/whale_penis2.jpg

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Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

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Whats worse than getting raped by a cow? Getting raped by two cows.

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A guy takes out his club and hits a baby seal with a fine for $50 for littering and threatens to smash the seal's favorite ceramic figurine with the club if he doesn't pay the fine. The man is a park ranger and takes littering very seriously.

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yay for the idiot that posted "whats white, sticky and yummy? milk". WTF dude? milk has never been sticky and good at the same time and its never going to be. infact, ive never known milk to be sticky, maybe after such a long period of being spoiled the milk becomes somewhat sticky, but your attempt at creating a perverted joke that wasnt in anyway funny or even close to being correct was so poor i feel the need to post this and hope you read it and decide returning to school would be beneficial to the rest of your life. I guarantee everyone who reads your post about milk being sticky is thinking something pretty similar to what i am.

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette are on a cruise together. A horrifying accident occurs, sinking the boat and killing all of them. Their deaths are mourned by their respective family members.

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What do you call a zebra with no stripes? A zebra with no stripes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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