Whats blind and deaf? Hellen Keller.

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Why did Suzy have burns on her face? Because her little brother attacked her with a hot curling iron thinking it was a lightsaber.

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What's worse than eating half a worm? Eating somebody's brain.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Daisies are red. WHY IS MY GARDEN ON FIRE?

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so a black,Hispanic,chines,white and Asian man walk into a bar and they sat down had a couple drinks and had a good conversation and left as happy as could be

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am Jack Bauer, Where is the nuke?

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what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

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How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

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Now on breaking news!: Man found hanged upside down in a forest with 403 lethal knife-stabs in his back! Policeman: "We have concluded this is indeed the worst case of suicide ever"

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What is funny about civil and women's rights? Nothing, they are very serious matters.

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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Why do elephants paint there feet yellow? so they can hide in mustard bottles. Have you ever seen an elephant in a mustard bottle? exactly

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Q. How do you drowned a blond A. Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool

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Why'd the blonde jump out the window? To kill herself

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Why did the man stop running. He was tierd

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Q: Why did the son of the dad who went fishing with him die? A: Well, he was either eaten by a shark or drowned while being the bait before that.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I believe you've seen enough of these already.

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How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

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I walk into a bar...

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i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

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Q: What happens when a Jew with a boner runs into a wall? A: He breaks his nose.

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A Jew, black person, and Mexican jump out of a plane, which one falls first? Who cares they all died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops