Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

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There was once a boy named Aladin. He was very poor until he found a magic lamp. When he rubbed the lamp, a genie poped out of the lamp. He said... "I will grant you one wish, master" Aladin thought about this for a long time, until eventually he said... "I wish for all the chocolate in the world" "Very well, master" And the genie granted his wish and Aladin had all the chocolate in the world Unfortunately, because he ate so much chocolate, Aladin died of heart & liver failure

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A Wii.

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how do u have sex with a really hot girl who is not interested in you? Rape her in a dark ally

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Once there was an English man, A Scottish man and an Irsh man. They were all in a scenario where each of them had to undetake a task. The English man and the Scottish man undertook their task without any problems, but the Irish man was confused resulting in a hilarious outcome.

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A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

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Whats funnier than throwing a baby off the top of a building? The sound it makes when it hits the ground.

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What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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Why did the aisian man get pulled over? Because he was going over the speed limit .

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wat did one chicken say to the other bock bock

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What worse than seeing a worm in your apple? Half a worm in your apple.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

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Golf.

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Who is it?

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin that someone shot with red paintballs.

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How do you become a superhero? Eat 10 buckets of KFC.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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Roses are red Violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead live in the same neighborhood. They are Desperate Housewives

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whats long, hairy, and has one eye? my cat fluffy, he has cancer.

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why did suzie fall off the swing? because shes autistic and her mother likes to abuse her.

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Q: What would have been the easiest way to stop the second world war without killing anyone? A: Paid Hitler for his art.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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