Q: Why is Little Johnny in the hospital with a bullet wound and a broken arm? A: I shot him of his bike.

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

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How many Anne Franks does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, cause she's dead.

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What happened to the pig? It got turned into bacon like every other pig.

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How do you kill a dwarf? You put rope around his neck and attach the other end to a concrete slab. Proceed to then through him in the ocean.

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Where was sally during the bombing? Everywhere!

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Would you like to go to my jinga party, if you do save the date 9/11?

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Hook a finger from each hand in your mouth, now pull so your lips are tight and try to say "I was born on a pirate ship" I'm sorry, I can hardly understand you.

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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What more orange that a lime? Most things.

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The man said to his wife love hurts. the wife then progressed with punching in the face.

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roses are blue viloets are red this poem doesnt make sense microwave

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How did Pablo get into America from Mexico? He drove here!

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You're mama's SO stupid that when she applied to college, they were happy to help.

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Hitler walks in to pizza pizza, the manager asks how many? L

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Why did the bunny cross the road? Because it waited until a car was driving by and then got run over.

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What did the homosexual get for Christmas off his boyfriend? A lovely present off his loving partner.

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What did the little Jew boy get for Christmas? nothing he is a Jew, he doesn't celebrate Christmas.

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Little Johnny was walking through the park... only he had no legs. Little Johnny was raped later that day... while he bled out from him having his legs cut.

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What do a squirrel and a grape have in common? They are both purple except for the squirrel.

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Q: If a tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it, does it still make a sound? A: Yes

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor Adams. You called me about your father's stroke.

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Knock knock It's open, come in

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But officer, I did come to a full stop!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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