What do u do to blow off steam? I simply go to the top of the empire states building, poor gasoline in a bag, put a baby in it, light it on fire, and through it off the side. problem?

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emma brown i did tap that shit -jackson edwards

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Snapple Fact #1 -slaves made life easier

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What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

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Knock Knock Who's there? After no response, the man chuckled as he realized the sound of his TV mimicked that of his door knocker.

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a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, and died of cancer

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hi little boy you want some candy i dont know do you want some candy you creeper

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What did the kid in the wheelchair get for Christmas? AIDS.

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A man told his daughter not to give his dog coffee. His daughter turned and told him that she was his nurse and his alzheimers is getting worse.

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Someone just commented on my joke! ... oh wait it was myself

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

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How many baby's does it to paint a wall red? It depends how many you throw.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Everything's grey, I'm a dog.

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Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it looked both ways and saw no cars coming.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

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What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

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How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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