- Anti Joke

What's worse than a necrophobiac in a morgue? A necrophiliac. What's worse than a necrophiliac in a morgue? Seeing your family hacked to death by an evil axe murderer.

Q: What's blue and yellow all over? A: A baby at the bottom of the pool with a slashed floatie. Q: What's red and yellow all over? A: A floatie at the top of a pool with a slashed baby.

Why did the black guy not like oreos? because he is a very health concious person and knowes that too much of a bad thing can make you fat.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Enough.

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

I have a very serious problem with my narcolepsy. I occasionalolahdf;honainbirgnipqgierngiaqbhgpqruiph

What's twelve inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

What happens when you run over a mexican? The country gets one less illegal immigrant.

A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

Why did Johnathan drop his popsicle? He was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Johnathan

What's worse than having two girlfriends at once. Seven. Seven girlfriends. All across America.

How do you get a baby to start crying? Drop a brick on it. How do you get it to stop crying? Drop two bricks on it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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A clown walking down the steet, trips -Ryan Vallee

Why did the baby die? Because I refused to feed it.

What fires shots? A gun

Your momma's so fat: She regrets not making the most of her youth whilst she was still attractive.

the bully said, you're just small fries. the fries couldn't help it someone ordered a small!

Obama = ebola

Q: How many licks does it take to the center of a tootsie pop? A: At least one.

roses are red violets are blue this verse doesn't ryhme and neither does this one