Q: How do you make a fireman cry?? A: Drown his wife

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Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

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You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

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What is White on Top and Black on bottom? Micheal Jackson.

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Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

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A Blonde, a Jew, a Rooster, and a Mexican walk into a bar and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

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Q: Whats the difference between a trash can full of dead babies, and a porch? A: A porch isnt in my garage.

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Why couldn't the pirate play poker? Poker is a tricky game - maybe he'd never been taught how to play.

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What's worse than a dog peeing on your new flower garden? A terrorist attack.

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Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

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Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

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What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

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A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

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Oh my god it's the twinkie mobile!

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Q: Whats horny and likes your leg? A: My dog.

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, walls are inanimate things therefore it cannot talk.

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

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An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

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How do you get a baby to stop crying Cut its head off

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your mum

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why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops