Q. what happend to the guy who walked by an alley in new york? A. he got beat up by a robber wich took hes money, cellphone, keys and his abillity to walk.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is deceased, therefore rendering her incapable of movement, which is required to drive a vehicle.

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what do you call five mexicans pushing a truck up a hill? Five mexicans stuck in the middle of nowhere looking for an auto mechanic.

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David Cameron

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What's black and white and red all over? Half a black face and half a white face after going through a blender

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a fat kid walked up to me today at school and claimed he could do more pull ups than i. i found this very funny because i have known this boy since i was two months old, and he witnessed the day where i lost both of my arms to cancer.

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What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

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What's the difference between a fat boy and a thin boy? Fizzy drinks!

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bike? I don't enjoy riding bikes.

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a guy walked into a bar, ordered a drink, sipped it slowly thinking of his waisted youth. then he finished his drink and went home to his wife of 34 years

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Yo momma is so stupid that she walked off a cliff.

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What did the fruit say when it was about to be sliced in half? Nothing, fruits cannot talk, duh.

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What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was mentally retarded and didnt know any better.

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whats white a smells like paint. whtie paint.

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''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

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whats nun plus nun two nuns haha!! from jarod :}

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Why was the cat in the bag? Because it's owner was abusive and put it in there.

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

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B==========D-------------------------- im pissin man! god!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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