Why was the cookie sad? It had just been eaten and is currently disintegrating in the hydrochloric acid of someones stomach.

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Are you from Africa because you sure look likes you've got Ebola

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Why was the little girl crying? Because she was hanging upside down from an oak tree.

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Why did Jim get hit by a train? Because he was standing in the tracks.

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

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your mom is so black that it can be assumed she is of african descent

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Man don't you hated when birds shit all over your car! Man I'm glad cows don't fly!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, STDs are contagious. Careful who you screw!

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What has Whitney Houston got in common with a spider? They're both black and they can't get out of the bathtub

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look im not better than you, your a ten im a two your a queen im a fool you got looks i got scares u got talent i got beuty to its a win win

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Why did little Sammy die of boredom? The WNBA was on

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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Teacher- Pick the odd one out- Man, whale, bat, squirrel, frog Student- Whale. All others are found in Nebraska

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What did the apple say to the grape? Nothing, fruit are incapable of speaking

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A sad guy walks in to a bar and the bartender asks, what's the matter? The guy responds, I just found out i'm deaf

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Roses are shut the f*** up. Violets are shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up.

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What did the german speech therapist say to his mute patient? There a few methods we can use to help you obtain the power of speech.

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roses are red violets are blue do i care? no.

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"knock, knock" "who is there?" Gestapo

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen? a school bus, if you consider children to be seamen

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what is red and bad for your teeth? a brick

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what did Tim do when he got married? He kissed the bride Mecheoo LOVES ASS

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whats the similarities between an xbox and michael jackson? there both made of plastic and they both get turned on by children

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Did you know that Obama wasn't born in the United States*? *the contiguous United States

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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