Santa Clogged my toliet

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Knock knock, come in.

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Why did Sally go to McDonalds? Because she felt like it

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What happens in the end of the original "Pinocchio" Italian fairy tale? He is hanged.

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P0P T4Rt

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Why did the snowman melt? It got tired of everyday life and decided that it would be best if he disappeared from society... His name was Dave...

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I you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

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How can you tell if someone is gay? It depends, sometimes they can be flamboyant or not. Actually, one could be straight and still be flamboyant, that's what makes the world less boring. Everyone is different, there's no surefire way of knowing, unless of course they tell you that they're gay.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

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Yo mama so fat she was diagnosed with diabetes and now has to regulate her daily intake of foods.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Life is like a box of chocolates, It doesn't last too long for fat people.

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Your mother is so fat, that she's working really hard to get back in shape so that she can support her family.

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Went to the corner shop - bought 4 corners.

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What is wrong with racism? A lot of things.

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whats the difference between a pizza and a jew -a pizza is food

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What did the 5 year old girl ask Santa for Christmas? A pony.

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Q: What do you call a unicorn on a mountain? A: Freaking sick.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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Why don't seagulls live in the bay? Because then they'd be bagels

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

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Oh...okay, good.

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Who was the dinosaurs favorite NBA player? He didnt have one. Dinosaurs became extinct far before the NBA was established.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops