I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because someone was chasing it.

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a retard? NOTHING!!!!!!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cannibal. Cannibal wh... As the man opened the door, he was eaten. And they lived happily ever after. The end.

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An Amish walks into Best Buy

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Whats the funniest part about 911? Over 1,000 People Died

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What happened when a fish rode a bike? It fell off and injured itself.

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What did the baby said to her mother? Nothing because she aborted him

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding cancer on your back

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A three legged dog walks into a saloon. He is quickly removed, as it was an establishment for humans and not for dogs.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Tie her up and force her to watch as you brutally murder her entire family.

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What do you call a Mexican mixed with a platypus? a pineapple

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Why did the groom have cold feet? Because his socks were slightly damp resulting in evaporation and the cooling of his feet, as well as the cold weather in December.

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Why did Billy fall off the Empire State building? He didn't fall, he jumped. He decided to commit suicide due to his lack of friends, caring parents, low self-esteem, and self-concious issues. Billy really needed a therapist.

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whats the difference between a pizza and a jew -a pizza is food

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Haikus are easy They are simpler than you think Just don't run out of...

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A black guy walks up to a drug dealer. He asked the drug dealer for directions and went on with his life.

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You are the third derivative of the position function.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "For Christ's sakes, Grandma, put your pants back on!"

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Q: What's more gross than uncooked hamburgers? A: Afterbirth.

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There were a boy with cancer, and when a said "were" is because he is dead now

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A father of 4 commits suicide. his kids celebrate shortly after.

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What did the 5 year old girl ask Santa for Christmas? A pony.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops