What is the difference between jam and jelly? Jam has chunks of fruit, jelly does not.

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q. whats worse than finding your girlfriend cheating on you a. the holocaust

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What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer.

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What is Jason? Black.

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Murray Harnett Smells like a dirty Burringbar Whore!

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The Theory of Relativity, proposed by the Jewish physicist Albert Einstein (1879-1955) in the early part of the 20th century, is one of the most significant scientific advances of our time. Although the concept of relativity was not introduced by Einstein, his major contribution was the recognition that the speed of light in a vacuum is constant and an absolute physical boundary for motion. This does not have a major impact on a person's day-to-day life since we travel at speeds much slower than light speed. For objects travelling near light speed, however, the theory of relativity states that objects will move slower and shorten in length from the point of view of an observer on Earth. Einstein also derived the famous equation, E = mc2, which reveals the equivalence of mass and energy. When Einstein applied his theory to gravitational fields, he derived the "curved space-time continuum" which depicts the dimensions of space and time as a two-dimensional surface where massive objects create valleys and dips in the surface. This aspect of relativity explained the phenomena of light bending around the sun, predicted black holes as well as the Cosmic Microwave Background Radiation (CMB) -- a discovery rendering fundamental anomalies in the classic Steady-State hypothesis. For his work on relativity, the photoelectric effect and blackbody radiation, Einstein received the Nobel Prize in 1921.

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A man is on anti jokes, he is not laughing.

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You know that you are going to fail horribly when... your purpose generally defeats the mission.

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What do you call a man with a convex isogonal nonprismatic head? Rhombicosidodecahedron head.

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Why was the farmer buried in a grave on the top of a hill? He had died and this would be his final resting place.

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What's the worst part about having sex with a two year old? -Hearing the hip bone snap. What's the best part about having sex with a two year old? -Hearing the hip bone snap.

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is this love , is this love , is this love , that im feeling , no bob im afraid its cancer.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police your son died in a car wreck.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Your Mom.

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What did the businessman at work do when he found out his wife was cheating on him? He stayed in his cubicle and continued to work, because he was a diligent, hard-working man.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He saw and ice cream truck across the street and rode towards it as fast as he could, sadly it was rush hour and he was hit by a speeding ambulance because he forgot to look both ways.

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A man walked into a bar. He said "ow".

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Why couldn't dracula's wife get to sleep? She had insomnia.

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Guess what? Chicken butt

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How many Somalians can you fit in a Shopping trolley? Well rather unfortunately there is a lack of Shopping Centers in Somalia due to its corrupt government and its general poverty in comparison to a 1st world country, needless to mention the civil wars. I would guess 7 though.

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Why was the clown murdered? Because it laughed at my cousin so he ran right into the icicle 10 times to the heart

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How does a blonde get pregnant? (I don't know) And you thought blondes were dumb.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Whats the funniest part about 911? Over 1,000 People Died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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