Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

A baby seal walks in to a club

Why did the woman die? She was hit by a bus.

One penguin says to another penguin, "It looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other penguin says, "Yea, I have to go to dinner party later."

A black man killed someone

what is the square root of pi? crust^2 + Cool Whip

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "For Christ's sakes, Grandma, put your pants back on!"

Why was the boy sad? Because his dog was brutally murdered and the man responsible painted his bedroom walls in the dogs blood.

why do women have small feet. so they can stand closer to the sink

Why did the baby cross the street? It was stapled to the chicken

a Mormon knocked on my front door three times, and i took three seconds to answer, whe shook hands for three seconds. how many dead kittens can fit in my blender?

Whats the difference between a duck? Yellow bills.

what is white and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? a refrigerator.

Women rights..

An antijoke

Why did Donald Duck go to college? He didn't, he's a fictional cartoon character.

9/11 isn't funny. 19 Muslims died that day.

A kid is Jackin off and his dad walks in and says if you keep jackin off you will loose your sight. the kid says dad im over here.

what do you call a fish with no gills? I dont know what youd call that creature...but its no fish.

What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

There once was a man from Peru Who fell asleep in a canoe He got a slight case of sunburn which improved later after applying some ointment.

yo momma is so fat her doctor recommended a new healthy diet.

Q: Whats worse than having a dead car battery? A: Going to prison and getting raped by a black guy

Asians...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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