"What was the hardest thing about that kid getting killed by that bus." "What?" "My dick"

Q : Why did the girl fall off the swimset ? A : Gravity pulls smaller masses towards larger masses, so the girl being the smaller mass, got attracted to the bigger mass, AKA the Earth, and that's why she fell.

What do you get when you cross an octopus with a camel? Nothing, inter-species breeding is impossible.

What did the businessman at work do when he found out his wife was cheating on him? He stayed in his cubicle and continued to work, because he was a diligent, hard-working man.

Why do black people smell? So blind people can hate them too.

What did the young girl with leukemia say to a stranger? I am afraid

Why couldn't dracula's wife get to sleep? She had insomnia.

What do you call a old guy watching little kids in a pool? a life guard

I like jokes.

A man cheats on his wife and ruins his marriage of 24 years.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

There once was a man from Nantucket, but he's dead.

What do you call a black man in an expensive car? A licensed driver.

Why was six afraid of seven? Well, seven has a huge drinking problem. He killed a man in a bar fight once. He is also very intense about his boxing career. He works out so hard that he is huge. He has enormous anger problems as well. Seven isn't the only one with problem though. Six is a Vietnam veteran and has been easily scared ever since he came home. The psychiatrist says he has a bad case of paranoia. Just something about seven reminds six of the soldiers that killed his friends. Also seven ate nine, and cannibals are SCARY!

Why was the Asian man told to open his eyes? He was sleeping.

son, you're adopted.

I love you very much.

Every 60 seconds in Africa. A minute passes.

your matriarchal component is so overweight that her body mass index is over the desired level for her height and age

youre gay

Knock Knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave's crying because his grandmother has alltimers and now can't remember his name

what is the square root of pi? crust^2 + Cool Whip

What's red and puts out fires? A fire truck? Oh, you've heard this joke before.

What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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