Bob: The whale is a creature that isn't naturally capable of creating any kind of technologically advanced unit of operations? Spectator: Was that actually a question or a statement? Bob: To be candid, occasionally my mind registers the practically indelible impression that I am not competent enough to effectively articulate my relatively subtle thoughts of philosophical value. Spectator: What'd you attempt to explicate? Bob: Hello, contemporary. Spectator: That's definitely considerably better than, "Benevolent greeting to you, fellow indigenous inhabitants of the magnificant, planetary cynosure, Earth Prime." You've managed to improve! Bob: I shall try to emulate those simpletons of this planet in order to garner new allies. Maybe next time I should just stick with some traditional routines that many people currently practice on a daily basis. Now, it's time to examine some "test subjects" so to educate myself further on the nature of my numerous classmates, purported facillitators etc. Spectator: Bye. Bob: See you next time! Wow... I amaze myself with my ability to efficiently adapt to my circumstantial situations. I mean, I am a ninja student who has developed new skills at communication! Wait... nevermind. Bystander: man, were you just soliloquizing... and personally enjoying it? Bob: Ehhh,... No? Bystander: Was that a statement or a question?

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wat?

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Why do black people smell? So blind people can hate them too.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Living through the Holocaust and finding a time machine to take you back to the beginning of it again.

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P0P T4Rt

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Why was the clown murdered? Because it laughed at my cousin so he ran right into the icicle 10 times to the heart

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How did the fat kid stop the bus? He didn't...

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Why was Brother Jim so loyal to god? Because he had a harpoon through his anal cavity.

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Im not racist i love black people i have 5 of them.

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride his bike? His family had to sell it in order to put food on the table

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Hair

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I was going to write a joke about how I have alzheimers but than I forgot it

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Q: why did timmy fall over? A: he was hit by a plane

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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How did the old man climb the hill? He didn't.

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your matriarchal component is so overweight that her body mass index is over the desired level for her height and age

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding cancer on your back

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62

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what do you call someone that ran into a wall hurt

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Dying of terminal cancer.

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Q: What's more gross than uncooked hamburgers? A: Afterbirth.

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his dog was brutally murdered and the man responsible painted his bedroom walls in the dogs blood.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems, nice tits

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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