What did the white person say to the black person? Nothing, the black person was sleeping.

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What do you get when you cross an octopus with a camel? Nothing, inter-species breeding is impossible.

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What is worse then failing a test? Cancer

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Three kids were waiting in line at a camp. One said how long is the wait. The other two said i hope its long. They were waiting in line for the gas chambers at auchwitz

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what did the apple say to the banana nothing, bananas cant talk

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Whats Orange,Leathery gets passed around by sweaty dudes and the next name will start with an S Snooki

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"hey you know that graveyard down the street." "yeah." "people are dying to get in there."

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Bob: The whale is a creature that isn't naturally capable of creating any kind of technologically advanced unit of operations? Spectator: Was that actually a question or a statement? Bob: To be candid, occasionally my mind registers the practically indelible impression that I am not competent enough to effectively articulate my relatively subtle thoughts of philosophical value. Spectator: What'd you attempt to explicate? Bob: Hello, contemporary. Spectator: That's definitely considerably better than, "Benevolent greeting to you, fellow indigenous inhabitants of the magnificant, planetary cynosure, Earth Prime." You've managed to improve! Bob: I shall try to emulate those simpletons of this planet in order to garner new allies. Maybe next time I should just stick with some traditional routines that many people currently practice on a daily basis. Now, it's time to examine some "test subjects" so to educate myself further on the nature of my numerous classmates, purported facillitators etc. Spectator: Bye. Bob: See you next time! Wow... I amaze myself with my ability to efficiently adapt to my circumstantial situations. I mean, I am a ninja student who has developed new skills at communication! Wait... nevermind. Bystander: man, were you just soliloquizing... and personally enjoying it? Bob: Ehhh,... No? Bystander: Was that a statement or a question?

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Today I exchanged money for Meth. There is no joke here. I'm a drug addict

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That's unfortunate.

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I wanted to burn some calories, so i lit a fat kid on fire

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Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: The holocaust

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A man saw a dinosaur. He probably watched it on the television because dinosaurs have been extingt for a very long time.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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What do you think about whats happening in the middle east right now? You're an idiot.

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if this joke was a potato, it would be a good potato

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I was going to write a joke about how I have alzheimers but than I forgot it

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A ship sinks in the middle of the South Pacific, only one man survives. He swims over to a deserted island.

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Why was the Asian man told to open his eyes? He was sleeping.

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Q: why did timmy fall over? A: he was hit by a plane

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

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What's a four letter word that ends with "rape"? Stop.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here!" The second muffin replies, "Yes, I'm in a lot of pain. Also, I've had a headache for quite a while now. I went to the doctor last Thursday and he preformed an X-ray but the results are not back yet. This extreme heat is likely worsening my already fragile physical health."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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