Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here!" The second muffin replies, "Yes, I'm in a lot of pain. Also, I've had a headache for quite a while now. I went to the doctor last Thursday and he preformed an X-ray but the results are not back yet. This extreme heat is likely worsening my already fragile physical health."

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What is a terrible tragedy and wears ice skates? Holocaust; The musical on ice

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say mustache? ...No. I wish you had said mustache.

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A man walks into a bar. He's blind.

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater.

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What do you call Morgan Freeman on a bad day? Samuel L. Jackson.

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three men walk into a bar. they are immediately rushed to urgent care due to blunt force trauma

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What did the blind, deaf and mute girl get for christmas? Cancer.

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Roses are rde, violets are bule, I am dyslexic, how about you?

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Why did the man cross the inerstate? Well, he only got half way till he got hit by a truck, but he wanted to, it was suicide. oh ya, it wasnt a man it was a chicken. oh well. They are both dead.

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Why did Jack and Jill fall down the hill? Because they were donuts

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whens your birthday? July 16th What year? Every year

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Knock Knock Come in!

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What did the man with paranoid schizophrenia say? I suffer from paranoid schizophrenia.

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ha do call a by with red heir a freckles? ginger

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An asian kid in a classroom starts to squint to try to see the board that is far away. A white man looks at the kid and asks, "Hey asian, is it hard for you to see that board?" The Asian replies, "Yes, yes it is."

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your moms so fat she has kankles

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I know animal testing is cruel, but my dog did really well on the SATs.

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Q. Why did the girl fall of the bridge A. Her dad pushed her

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what do you call a fish with no gills? I dont know what youd call that creature...but its no fish.

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Why don't blind people skydive? They do.

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Why does your mom moan and scream at night? She had a rough childhood, filled with all types of despair and disappointment.

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Q: Whats worse than having a dead car battery? A: Going to prison and getting raped by a black guy

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Turtles

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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