Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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a man walked into a bar and said ow

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A little gir gets stung by a bee. Her parents see the bump She now geting meletedin Rehab because her parents saw her shoot up heroine.

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I Love Hitler.

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A man goes into a store to buy some bread, He asks a woman behind the counter for help. She says " We have white, wheat, or rye. What kind would you like?" . To which the man replies, " It does not matter, I rode my bicycle.

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How did the blonde die? She got slurped up by a 1,000-foot anteater. How did the 1,000-foot anteater die? He got slurped up a 10,000 foot anteatereater. How did the 10,000 foot anteatereater die? It doesn't matter. The Earth just got slurped up by a one-trillion-foot planeteater.

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professor x walks over to wolverine with good news, he falls and dies of a severe concussion

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your fat

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Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? A black Russian.

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Knock Knock Come in.

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroying his family.

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GUY 1: Mann, I just got done working out, check out my forearms!!! GUY 2: You only have two silly!!

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if life gives you lemons, make lemonade. unless you only get one lemon, then it really hard to make a good glass..and for that matter, who said you had a juicer? it would be really hard to just squeeze the juice out of a lemon. on top of that, what kind of situation am I in that I would need lemonade? let's say if life gives you lemons, determine the best use of them based on need, local weather and economic status

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What do you call an epileptic in a bowl? James, if that happens to be his name.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why did the black kid fail in school? Because of the achievement gap.

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Whats Orange,Leathery gets passed around by sweaty dudes and the next name will start with an S Snooki

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why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno.

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ASSCHEEKS

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Living through the Holocaust and finding a time machine to take you back to the beginning of it again.

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A man cheats on his wife and ruins his marriage of 24 years.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ..To get to the other side

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Why did Suzy drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops