Why did the sloth cross the road? To murder your whole family.

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why didn't the kid win the talent show? He wasn't talented.

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What did the guy say to the mushroom?

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yo momma is so fat her doctor recommended a new healthy diet.

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What do yo call SQUIRAL!!!!

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Q: What do you call a gray box without a joke in it? A: I don't know but you'd better think of something.

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Jews for Jesus

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why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

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A priest, a Rabi, and a Monk walk out of the bar and go home.

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ha do call a by with red heir a freckles? ginger

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A straight-A star quarterback was about to throw the game-winning pass during the final game of his school's season. If he got this pass their undefeated record would have been completed for the last 50 years. Before he threw the pass, he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

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What's the difference between an Asian driver and a Belgian prostitute? Nothing at all: Marie-Edith Yang is proud of her mixed heritage, and earns a decent wage in a relatively clean brothel in the lovely little medieval town of Bruges.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Someone asks for his autograph to which he replies. "Sure"

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A dwarf walks under a bar.

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live babies

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What do you get when you mate an elephant with a rhino? Not much of anything except inter-species animal sex, considering the fact that the two do not share enough genetic material to create any sort of offspring.

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Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

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There once was a man named Joe. Joe had AIDS, and killed all his friends and family The End, now go back to bed, pussy

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What did the blonde do when she found out one is most likely to get in a car accident within 6 miles of the home? She drove more carefully in her neighborhood.

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Fat chickens enjoy stepping on doorknobs.

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Roses are red Violets are red Everything is red If you are dead... Or a potato

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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What's the difference between a baby and cheese? I don't like cheese in my sandwiches.

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Women's rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops