Is Carly smart? No.

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Justin Bieber had sex with a woman.

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What is worse then failing a test? Cancer

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? - Getting raped by an giant scorpion.

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Have you heard the one about the drunk cleaning lady? I haven't either but I bet it is good. That is a pretty good premise for a joke.

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What do you call a old guy watching little kids in a pool? a life guard

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why did my girlfriend fail her test? she was pregnant :'(

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I was having sex with my girlfriend the other night and she called me a pedofile. i told her that was a pretty big word for a 9 year old.

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they make me sick. i hate them all with their big noses. they should all be rounded up and............... Oh I'm sorry, i thought this was anti-jew.com

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Why was Brother Jim so loyal to god? Because he had a harpoon through his anal cavity.

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride his bike? His family had to sell it in order to put food on the table

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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What do you think about whats happening in the middle east right now? You're an idiot.

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What's worse than having a friend in a car accident? Laughing at their funeral.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here!" The second muffin replies, "Yes, I'm in a lot of pain. Also, I've had a headache for quite a while now. I went to the doctor last Thursday and he preformed an X-ray but the results are not back yet. This extreme heat is likely worsening my already fragile physical health."

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The government makes a good decision

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Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because Santa doesn't exist.

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What do you call Morgan Freeman on a bad day? Samuel L. Jackson.

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Why don't seagulls live in the bay? Because then they'd be bagels

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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A guy walks into a bar. He order three drinks and hands them to the lady behind him. It's because she is an alcoholic.

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Jess Burns

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What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

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the cow goes moo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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