Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

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ha do call a by with red heir a freckles? ginger

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An asian kid in a classroom starts to squint to try to see the board that is far away. A white man looks at the kid and asks, "Hey asian, is it hard for you to see that board?" The Asian replies, "Yes, yes it is."

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I know animal testing is cruel, but my dog did really well on the SATs.

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Q: What do you call a group of asians riding their bikes while carrying large bags of merchandise filled with an ample amount of video games? A: Obviously, a few enviromentally-friendly entrepreneurs who managed to make enough of a profit via their established buisness to the extent that they could buy what they required and get some other desired items as well.

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Q. Why did the girl fall of the bridge A. Her dad pushed her

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Q: Why did the girl fall of her swing? A: She was hit by a rogue fridge. Q: Why didn't she get back up? A: She was quite badly injured.

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? One walks on the moon and the other f*cks little boys.

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what do you call a fish with no gills? I dont know what youd call that creature...but its no fish.

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Turtles

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Q: Whats worse than having a dead car battery? A: Going to prison and getting raped by a black guy

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Why does your mom moan and scream at night? She had a rough childhood, filled with all types of despair and disappointment.

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A man and his son are in a store, the man says to his son, "That candy bar has your name on it." The son replies, "I wish that you didn't name me Butterfingers." The dad answers, "I wish that you were never born."

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What did the first muffin say to the second? Nothing. Muffins can't talk, you idiot.

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whats worst than reading youtube comments? Panic at the disco

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What's brown and sticky? ...poop....and refried beans

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A man was walking down the street and witnessed a car crashed. He was traumatize.

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What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? Mentally confused.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? About 3:26 PM Eastern Standard Time.

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roses are white violets are green if you you sit on santas lap he will stab you

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How many babies does it take to fill a ditch? Six if you pack them in really tight.

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How do you stop a puppy from barking in the front yard? Put him in the backyard.

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Why was the mom sad cause she had an abortion

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Murray Harnett Smells like a dirty Burringbar Whore!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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