Why is a zebra named gorge fat? Because it ate Mcdonalds

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What's red and green? A frog in a blender!

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

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is this love , is this love , is this love , that im feeling , no bob im afraid its cancer.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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How do you stop an assassin? Kill their target

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Popsicle!

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A man walked into a bar. He said "ow".

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Whats the difference between Justin Beiber and Polio? Polio was cured.

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knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant

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hi bye

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whats brown and falls out poop :) - haha

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What do you think about whats happening in the middle east right now? You're an idiot.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

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What's worse than being human? Nothing... No I literally mean nothing at all. Like not being anything?

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What is the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? One is food the other, fuel.

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Why did the plain crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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There is an Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman and they are climbing up a mountain, when they reach the top and decide to climb down again.

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Q. A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car. Who's driving? A. The police officer

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Five guys one rape.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows. Chickens aren't capable of knowing why they do things.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here!" The second muffin replies, "Yes, I'm in a lot of pain. Also, I've had a headache for quite a while now. I went to the doctor last Thursday and he preformed an X-ray but the results are not back yet. This extreme heat is likely worsening my already fragile physical health."

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some one knocked on tims door, at the same exact time, someone died in africa

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a guy walks down a street when he sees a bomb he walks away

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops